Enigmatic
by AlexandraBastian
Summary: Erudite born Jacquetta wasn't particularly the brightest girl in her faction... in fact she was the worst at everything, the Erudite hadn't seen anything like it before. Join Jac on her journey into the unknown, mysterious ways of Dauntless, and the varying feelings she finds for the people around her, including her enigmatic instructor, who constantly has her on her toes.
1. Chapter 1

**_Erudite._**  
_Characterized by great knowledge; learned or scholarly._  
Something that I certainly didn't have much of... At all. I'd tried my hardest, tried to keep up with the other children that were calculating all kinds of sums, coming out with numbers that made my head pound. It had been hopeless.

And it's here, as I'm climbing up the side of the railway with the Dauntless members, that I realise how much of a good decision I'd made._ I was destined for Dauntless._

My parents had realised that I had a bleak future in Erudite when I was about ten. They'd prayed that I'd be able to figure it all out in the end, they'd given me god knows how much tutoring, but I'd constantly failed. It wasn't until I'd completely messed up in a lab experiment at school by mixing two chemicals that weren't even supposed to be on the same desk, never mind in test tubes together, that they knew for a fact that I wouldn't ever make it as an Erudite. They'd tried their hardest to convince me that Amity would be a good place for me in the future, they'd spent the last seven years trying to make sure that I'd have a secure place to live my life. Unfortunately for them, my heart had been set on something much more wild. I wanted to join Dauntless, and that was where I was going to go whether my Parents and my Aptitude test agreed or not. My parent's faces had dropped when I dripped my blood into the dark, sizzling coals, and it hadn't been a very nice last look at my parents. My Father'd had a grimace present on his features, and my Mother had looked incredibly confused... But I was certain that they'd get over it. They couldn't protect me forever.

I stand beside the track and catch my breath as the sound of the train horn fills my ears. I knew what we were supposed to do. We were supposed to jump on whilst it's still moving. I'd watched the Dauntless after school enough to know that. The door of each train car is open, waiting for the Dauntless-born initiates to jump in, and they do, until only the new initiates are left. I take a deep breath, then start running alongside the train, before throwing myself sideways. I cling onto the handle of the door for a few seconds before managing to yank myself up and into the car.

I stand up properly and catch my breath again, smiling to myself. I hadn't even thought about it, I'd just jumped. I bit down on my bottom lip and turned to look at the view of the city. I felt the wind rush through my long blonde hair, and I couldn't help but smile again. It was then that I heard a squeal, and turned to see that a small Amity girl was still on the outside of the car, clinging on to the handle tightly. I stepped to the side slightly, and held onto the door, before reaching my hand out and pulling her in.

"Thank you so much!" She panted, pushing the mousey blonde hair out of her face.

"No problem." I answered, smiling at her.

She smiled back at me, showing a row of straight pearly white teeth. She had light blue eyes that sparkled slightly, and her hair was fairly long and wavy, the front of it pinned back. "I really thought I wasn't going to make it."

"Don't think. Just do." I told her, without even realising what I'd said. I guess it was what I had been telling myself on the run up to this day.

She nodded. "You're clever. I like you."

I laughed. "You're the first person to ever tell me that!"

"What?! You're a Erudite, how have you never been told you're clever?!"

"I _was_ an Erudite." I corrected. "And you don't want to know why, but let's just say it's the reason I didn't stay."

She nodded again. "Okay." She smiled some more, and I saw the Amity in her, she seemed very optimistic.

I stared back out at the city, closing my eyes after a few seconds, letting the wind blow into my face.

"I'm Talulah." The Amity introduced herself.

I opened my eyes and twisted my head to look at her. "Nice to meet you. I'm Jacquetta.. But call me Jac."

"You too, lovely name."

I opened my mouth to speak, but was cut off by the shout from one of the other initiates. "They're jumping off!"

I turned my head to look back out of the car, and just like we'd been told, the Dauntless-born were jumping out of the car onto a roof. I knew that we were pretty high up, and my heart pounded at the thought of jumping off of the moving train onto a rooftop, what if I didn't make it?

_Don't think, just do. _I thought of the advice that I'd given Talulah just minutes ago and took a deep breath.

"Oh my, that is a big drop..." Talulah spoke, peering downwards at the edge of the car.

"Remember what I told you?" I asked her, grabbing her hand and pulling her towards the door further up.

"Your name?" She replied, confused.

"No. Don't think..."

"Just do!" She finished.

I nodded. "Well..." The space between us and the door was clear, so I started to run. "Run and jump!"

I tugged her along with me, and at the time I found appropriate, I leapt from the car out into the open. I felt like I was suspended in the air for hours, holding my breath, the wind billowing into me, when really it was just a matter of seconds. I landed on the tips of my toes and palms, with a thump, before losing my balance and rolling over the gravel, scraping my hands.

I snapped my head up to find Talulah, to see her lying just next to me, panting heavily. I smiled and wiped my hands on my blue shirt, before standing up and offering my hand to her.

She let out a relieved giggle, then took my hand and hauled herself up. "I can't believe I just did that! And I'm alive!"

I smiled again, and looked up at the Dauntless-born's creating a group over the other side of the rooftop. My smile dropped as we started to walk towards them, and I spotted a Dauntless man, older than the others, with deep creases in his dark skin and gray hair at his temples stood on the ledge. I got a sinking feeling in my stomach, and I had no idea why. "I have a feeling that's not the only dangerous thing that they want us to do today." I mumbled, just loud enough for Talulah to hear it.

"What?" She quietly questioned, but I didn't have time to answer.

"Listen up!" The man spoke, looking at the group in front of him. "My name is Max! I am one of the leaders of your new faction! Several stories below us is the members' entrance to our compound. You have to jump from here. If you feel that you cannot do it, you don't belong here. Our initiates have the privilege of going first."

"Is there something to catch us at the bottom?" A Candor boy asked.

"That would be telling."

I bit my lip and watched as Max stepped down and stood beside another Dauntless male. He also looked older than the rest of the group, but still fairly young. He was at least six foot tall, smothered in tattoos, and his face was pierced in so many places that I couldn't count. The two of them muttered something to each other quietly, before they looked up at the group.

"Come on. Someone's got to go first. We don't want to be here all day." The one next to Max spoke up. His eyes swept over the group and settled on Talulah. "Amity. You first."

Talulah and a boy that was stood a few feet away from us looked up in a panic. They were both Amity's.

"The girl." The man spoke, although I already knew that he meant Talulah.

She glanced at me, the fear evident on her face. I looked down into her eyes, and I knew that she was silently pleading with me to help her. She didn't want to go first, none of us did.

"Today." Max spoke, still stood next to the one that chose Talulah.

I watched as Talulah stepped forwards, and her bottom lip started to quiver. I couldn't let her go first, not when she was that petrified.

"Stop!" I ordered. All eyes moved up to look at me, and I swallowed nervously. "I-I'll go first... I want to go first."

The one next to Max stared at me for a second, his dark eyes sending chills through me. "Okay. Go then."

I slowly walked up to the edge and looked down. The building we were stood on formed one side of a square with three other buildings. In the center of the square was a huge hole in the concrete. I couldn't see what was at the bottom of it, and that scared the hell out of me.

They wouldn't let us all jump down there without the knowledge that we would land safely... Would they? Unless it was a trick, and I was the fool for being to eager and wanting to go first... _Don't think, just do. _I remembered my previous words, and had a feeling that I'd be using them often.

I took a deep breath, then stepped up on the ledge, trying to breathe steadily. _It was a long way down..._ I stopped thinking about it and looked straight ahead of me, I couldn't back out now and leave Talulah to jump, that was cowardly.

Without another thought, I bent my knees and jumped, stretching my arms out either side of me. My stomach lurched as I fell, the air around me blowing my hair everywhere. Yet again, I felt suspended in the air forever, before the hole surrounded me and I dropped into darkness, suddenly hitting something hard. I gasp in shock, as I bounce back up, then down again, each time getting smaller until I'm lying flat.

_It was a net. I landed on a net._

* * *

I look around at the other initiates, some of them still catching their breath, everyone's cheeks flushed from the air hitting them during the fall. A muscly, tanned, Dauntless guy had helped me down from the net, before Talulah came next, and announced that I was the first jumper. Whilst we were waiting for everyone else, I'd stood to the side with Talulah, watching the guy talk to two Dauntless women, that didn't look much older than us, and looking to see who had dropped next.

Max and the other guy dropped last, much more gracefully than the rest of us who had either screamed or had arms flailing everywhere, before the Dauntless spoke.

"I'll leave you to it." Max had told the ones that were already waiting down here, then turned and walked down a tunnel beside us.

"I'm Four." The one that had helped me off of the net announced. "This is Lauren and Isla."

The two of them took it in turns to lift a hand in a kind of welcome gesture when Four said their names, and smiled.

"And this is Eric." He introduced the one that had been on the roof with us, and he nodded, the grim expression on his face not changing at all. "Dauntless-born go with Lauren and Isla, you don't need a tour of the place."

Lauren beckoned them towards the tunnel, and they all headed off, soon disappearing from sight. I looked at the left overs around me. There was only seven of us left, no Abnegation, two Amity, three Candor, and two Erudite - including me, although I'd never seen the boy before.

"Most of the time I work in the control room, but for the next few weeks, I am your instructor." Four spoke again. He also led us down the tunnel that the others had gone down. We walked for about a minute, before he pushed a set of double doors open. "This is the Pit."

It is an underground cavern that is absolutely huge. Uneven rock walls rise several stories above my head. Built into the stone walls are places for food, clothing, supplies, leisure activities. Narrow paths and steps carved from rock connect them. There are no barriers to keep people from falling over the side. It was amazing.

The Dauntless are everywhere, children running around, adults chatting and joking. The chaos was mesmerising.

Four led us to the Chasm next. It is a large ledge, with a river at the bottom of it, and just by leaning on the rails at the top, I could feel small sprays of water.

"A jump off this ledge will end your life, without a doubt. It has happened before and it will happen again." Eric called out, and I turned to look at him. Some how I had managed to forget that he was here.

"You've been warned." Four said, looking at us all sternly.

I shared a glance with Talulah, and her eyes widened slightly, before she looked back over the railing.

"Lets go and grab something to eat." Four spoke again, and led us down another tunnel.

I glanced back at the Chasm, wondering if people really had killed themselves by jumping off of that, or if they were trying to scare us. _Why would anyone want to jump off?_

I walked a little quicker, so that I was a few steps behind Four and could talk to him easily. He looked much more approachable than Eric.

"Four?" I called.

He glanced over his shoulder at me, and slowed his steps so that we were walking side by side. "Yeah?"

I turned my head to see Eric at the back of the group, looking at some Dauntless that just walked past us, before turning back to Four. "Was he being serious about people jumping off of that?"

He nodded. "Yes."

I shuddered and he noticed.

"It's not a nice sight, and it certainly doesn't keep the spirits high, so I'd suggest not to do it."

"You've got no worries when it comes to me, I'd like to live." I mumbled.

I saw a smirk appear on his face, as if he had a funny thought. But as soon as it appeared, it disappeared in the same second.

"Turn right." He instructed, and I did as I was told and saw a gaping hole in the wall. Beyond it, was a dining hall, full of people and food. When we walked in, the smell made my stomach rumble, and I couldn't wait to grab something to eat.

I turned to look at Talulah and she smiled, also spotting the food.

"Help yourselves!" Four called out, then wandered off.

Talulah and I stood and looked around for a second, taking in the sight, then decided to find somewhere to sit. By this point, the rest of the initiates had already sat down and started eating, so the only available seats we could find were by a few of the older Dauntless members. As we got closer, I recognised one of the women as Isla, and the one next to her looked familiar too.

I sat down opposite Isla, and started to pick at the food, deciding what I wanted to eat.

"Don't fill yourselves up too much, the deserts here are the best."

I looked up to see Isla smiling at me.

"Dauntless cake is amazing." The woman sat next to her joined in.

I smiled. "I'll have to try it then!"

"You have to, without a doubt!" Isla said. "You'll love it."

I plopped a french frie in my mouth and looked up at the woman next to Isla. "I recognise you." I told her.

"Well I should hope you do, you only saw me a few days ago, Jacquetta!" She cried.

And then it registered. She did my Aptitude test. "Oh of course!" I said, my eyes widening a little. "Lu, right?"

She nodded. "It's good to see you here."

"Thank you." I grinned at her, then turned my head to see Talulah quietly watching us. "Oh, this is Talulah by the way... I don't know if you've met."

Lu shook her head. "No we haven't. Nice to meet you, Talulah."

"You too." Talulah smiled and engaged in a conversation with her.

I stuffed another french frie in my mouth and looked around the room, watching other people interact. It was then, that the table at the end of the room caught my eye. Max and four others were sat there, eating and discussing things. I realised that it must be the Dauntless leader's table, as no one else had dared to approach it.

I looked along the row, taking a mental note of the leaders, and almost gasped when I saw the one on the end. _Eric?_ I hadn't the slightest clue that he was a leader. He looked too young... Way too young. How had he progressed up the ranks that quickly? Unless he didn't and had been offered the job by chance, or immediately. _Oh I didn't know.._ But I wanted to find out.


	2. Chapter 2

Eric took control of us after we'd eaten. He showed us to our accommodation, a fairly big room with ten small beds (that didn't look particularly comfortable), and a bathroom which we all needed to share. Personally, I thought this was a bad idea... After all, we all hardly knew each other, but I guess other initiates had to do it in previous years, so I'd have to suck it up and ignore my thoughts.

Eric had stood by the door, explaining the rules to us, but I hadn't really listened. I was intrigued as to why he, _a Dauntless leader_, was responsible for a bunch of initiates.

"We've instated new rules this year, which we hope to develop next year, to improve the training process."

"So you're cutting some of us? What does that even mean?!" One of the Candor boys, James, questioned.

_Wait.. Cutting?! _I'd missed too much of the conversation.

Eric stared at him as if he was stupid. "It means you're out. You won't be joining Dauntless."

I frowned.

"I thought we were already part of Dauntless though?" The Erudite boy, who's name I had learned to be Freddie, questioned.

"Not unless you pass the initiation." Eric stated, looking bored of the conversation. "If you place lower than fifteen in the first stage of training, then you aren't cut out to be Dauntless. Simple as."

I could have sworn I saw a glint in his eye as he spoke, and I almost shuddered. He was an incredibly dark man.

"So we'll be made Factionless?" James asked.

"Well where else will you go? Mummy and Daddy can't take you back."

I swallowed deeply. So if I didn't do well in these tests, then I'd be made homeless... _Great_. Definitely what I signed up for.

"You're free to do what you want now." Eric checked his watch. "I'd suggest getting showered and an early night. You'll need to prepare yourself for tomorrow."

I sighed and looked back at the beds. I'd let everyone else choose before I did, I couldn't be bothered with any arguing over who's sleeping where.

As everyone dispersed, I was summoned by the dark lord himself.

"First jumper." Eric called, and I turned and slowly approached him.

"Yeah?"

"It was good what you did on the roof today, but you aren't going to be able to protect your little Amity friend forever. You need to concentrate on yourself, or you won't get very far."

I frowned. "I wasn't protecting Talulah, but it's unfair for her to be made do something that she doesn't want to do."

"We all have to do things that we don't want to." He replied. "The sooner you learn that, the sooner you'll succeed."

"Right..." I nodded slowly and looked over my shoulder at the beds.

"Go and get some sleep, initiate. Trust me, you'll need it."

* * *

I awoke to the clanging of metal the next morning, the sound making my ears hurt slightly. I groaned and sat up, rubbing my eyes as the light filled them.

Four was stood on the stairs, making a ruckus to wake us all up. "Morning initiates. I want you in the Pit by eight o'clock. If you're late, you'll lose points before you've even managed to gain them."

I frowned and rubbed my eyes again, then looked up to see Four's retreating figure. I flopped back onto my pillow, my hair splaying around me, a yawn escaping my lips. Surprisingly, I'd slept well, dreaming about running with the Dauntless, dressed in all black. It was almost like a dream come true being here right now, and I didn't feel worried about being made Factionless, because I was determined to be here. However, I hadn't actually started any training yet, so I was thinking way too prematurely.

"Good morning, Jac." Talulah greeted from where she was sat on the end of her bed, right beside mine.

"Morning." I mumbled, not feeling particularly talkative.

"Are you not a morning person? I can leave you to wake up a bit if you'd like?"

I shook my head. "I'll never get up if you leave me alone, but I'd prefer it if you spoke without needing an answer."

A small smile appeared on her lips. "I'll just come and check that you're getting up every ten minutes."

I nodded and mumbled, "Thanks." before closing my eyes again.

True to her word, Talulah had checked on me every ten minutes, and I'd eventually gotten up with half an hour to get ready. I'd scooped my hair into a loose updo on top of my head, then headed into the bathroom to wash, before changing into my Dauntless black clothing. It was tight-fitting and I smiled to myself, I felt like a proper Dauntless, even though I still had a way to go.

I'd skipped breakfast, not feeling particularly hungry, giving myself time to mentally prepare myself for the day. I'd sat on the end of my bed for a few moments, telling myself that no matter what, I would never give up. I would not give my parents the satisfaction of saying 'I told you so' if things didn't work out in Dauntless, not that I would have gotten to hear it if they were to say it.

I'd arrived at the Pit at just the right time, the others filing through from the dining hall at that exact moment. Four was waiting inside for us, staring at the door. We approached him, and huddled around to look at him as he spoke.

"Today we will be learning the basics." He informed us. "Basic fighting techniques, basic use of a gun, and basic techniques of knife throwing."

I looked around and saw that we were surrounded by targets, some of them looking like the shape of a human body, others just a plain round board.

"I'll be teaching you the fighting techniques this morning, then we'll take a break for lunch at about one. Got it?" He asked, getting a small response from us. "This way then."

* * *

By lunch time, my entire body felt like it was throbbing. I'd spent the past two years working out as much as I could, but that had felt like nothing compared to what Four had us do this morning. The warm up had been bad enough, running an entire lap of the Dauntless grounds, before god knows how many sit ups, push ups and stretches, never mind the actual techniques. He'd shown us how to kick, punch and block, then sent us off to practise with each other, telling us that it needed perfecting.

By the time I'd arrived in the dining hall, I could have curled up and had a nap on the table.

"You look exhausted." Lu spoke, looking up from the opposite side of the table. Somehow, we'd managed to be the last ones in again and ended up sat with Lu and her friends once more.

"I feel it." I grumbled, reaching my hand out for an apple.

She grinned. "You've got weapon training next, haven't you? Just you wait until tonight.. You'll sleep like a log."

I made a face and let out a loud sigh.

"Is it really that bad?" Talulah spoke from beside me.

Lu nodded. "If you've never shot a gun before, the first few times will feel incredibly odd. Like your bones are vibrating."

Talulah's eyes widened, and I frowned.

"Great." I muttered before taking a bite out of the apple.

"You're not very optimistic at all today, are you?"

"I'm not used to feeling this bad... It's like I've been a slob my entire life!"

Lu laughed. "You'll get used to it. Trust me, it gets easier."

"I'm taking your word for it." I mumbled, biting into my apple again.

* * *

Four met us all in the Pit again after lunch. When we arrived, the targets had all been set up properly, and guns were laid out waiting for us. I stared at them, biting my lip, trying to prepare myself for what Lu had told me.

"Next up, I'm going to teach you how a gun works." Four announced, looking at us all. "Come and collect one, then I'll go through it all."

We all did as we were told, and then listened as he explained each part of the gun and how to load it. I watched what he was doing with the gun carefully, to make sure that I didn't miss a single thing.

It was when he gave us an example of how to aim and shoot that I started to feel nervous, Lu's words circling my mind.

"Go to a target each, and try it out." Four ordered, and I slowly walked to the end one.

I watched as the others started to shoot, a few gasps and grunts filling my ears as the first few shots went off.

Talulah hadn't managed to get the target next to me, a Candor boy had, but he seemed okay to me.

I turned to the target, and stared at it determinedly. I lifted the gun, and aimed it as well as I could, just like Four had instructed. I closed my eyes for a second, then took a deep breath and opened them again. Shooting it incorrectly wouldn't harm anyone, I'd just have to try again.. There was no need to be nervous.

I stared for a second longer, before slowly pulling the trigger, feeling the gun's vibrations go all up my arms, knocking me back slightly. A small squeal escaped my lips, and I nearly dropped the gun, my heart pounding.

I heard a chuckle, and twisted my head in the direction that it had come from. The Candor boy beside me was laughing at me.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing..." He said, grinning.

"You used to be Candor and you're lying to me?"

He chuckled again. "I'm sorry, it's just your reaction to the shot was funny."

I rolled my eyes and looked back at the target. I'd completely missed it, and the bullet was embedded in the wall behind it. I sighed.

More determined to hit the target this time, I lifted the gun again and aimed the best that I could. I pursed my lips, before pulling on the trigger again, watching as the bullet hit the left side of the target.

A smile spread across my lips, and for some reason I looked back at the Candor.

He was also smiling, his eyebrows raised, nodding slowly. "Not bad, Erudite. Not bad. You're getting there."

I continued to smile. "Thanks."

"I'm Nathan." He introduced himself.

"Jac." I replied, nodding at him.

"Nice to meet you." He said, turning back to his target, lifting the gun.

"You too." I watched him as he aimed and shot, getting the bullet almost at the centre of the target. _The lucky shit! _I wanted to be able to do that.

* * *

The knife throwing came last. Four had allowed us all a quick break whilst he set up, then we were back at work, watching whilst he showed us the techniques.

I'd managed to get a place in between Nathan and Talulah, and watched as they threw their first knives. They both missed, and I was certain that I would too.

I lifted my arm to a position that mimicked Four's, and threw the small metal knife at the target that was a few metres away. Unfortunately, I missed, but it had hit the wood next to it and stayed, unlike Talulah's and Nathan's that had clattered to the floor.

Talulah threw hers again and missed, a frown forming on her face. "I can't get it." She grumbled, preparing herself to throw another. I watched as she did it, seeing it bounce off of the target and fall to the floor again.

"Why aren't you throwing?" A deep voice came from behind me, causing me to jump, and my heart to pound. I snapped my head around to see who the voice belonged to, to find that Eric had entered the room.

He was looking directly at me.

I swallowed and quietly spoke. "Me?" I asked.

"Yes, you." He approached me, and paused about a metre away.

"I was watching Talulah..." I answered his previous question.

"Were you instructed to do that?" He questioned.

I noticed that Four had made his way over and was stood beside Talulah, a frown present on his facial features.

"No..." I replied cautiously.

"So why are you doing it then?"

I frowned. _Why was he being an asshole?_ I stopped for a minute to watch Talulah throw... It wasn't a big deal? "I just wanted to see her technique."

His eyes flitted behind me to the targets, then fixed back on mine. "Why? She's not hit it. She's clearly doing something wrong."

I looked down at the floor, then back up at him, unsure of what to say.

"Come on Eric, leave it out." Four came to my rescue.

Eric ignored him. "Show me how you throw."

"Now?"

He stared at me like I was stupid. "No, in an hour. Yes, now!"

I turned back to my target, all the eyes of my fellow initiates on me. I lifted my arm, and positioned myself how I had the first time, then took a deep breath and threw the knife. It hit the edge of the target, a few inches away from where my first one had landed. I took another deep breath before turning back to look at Eric, to find that he was a lot closer than he had been before.

"You're stood wrong." He stated.

"Carry on, everyone!" Four shouted, diverting the attention from us.

Eric grabbed my hips and twisted my body so that I was turned to the side slightly. "Separate your legs a little more, and when you throw, lean back a bit."

I did as I was told, stepping my left foot back slightly, uncomfortable from the way he had just grabbed me.

He removed his hands from my hips, and lifted his right to position my arm. "Look at the exact spot that you want to hit and concentrate." He ordered. "Blank out everything else, except how you want to hit that spot."

He wrapped his hand around my wrist. "And then, you throw as hard as you can, not moving your eyes from that spot you're aiming for." He pulled my arm back, then we threw the knife together, his strength hurting my arm a little.

The knife hit just centimetres away from the centre of the target, and my eyes widened. _I had to admit, he was good._

"There we go." He spoke, then lowered his voice, moving closer to my ear. "Remember what I told you yesterday?"

I slowly nodded.

"Amity will stop you succeeding, initiate. Don't forget that." He stepped away from me, and walked away, towards where Four was watching the others.

I stared after him, a frown furrowing my eyebrows. _Why was he so against Talulah?_ She hadn't done anything to him had she? Damn, that man was confusing.


	3. Chapter 3

The next three days followed pretty much the same routine. We were woken up by Four, and spent the days training, too tired to do anything in the evenings. A few of us had gone out to see what goes on in the Pit, but I wasn't one of them. In fact, every day I'd had dinner, then hopped in the shower and climbed straight into bed.

I'd sit and talk with Talulah and Nathan if they stayed in the accommodation, and I think we'd all become quite good friends. Nathan was surprisingly friendly, and tried his hardest to not blurt out the things that came into his head, a trait that most Candor's had. I was also certain that Talulah had found him attractive. I'd read once that if someone found another person attractive, their pupils in their eyes would dilate... Talulah's did every time she looked at Nathan, and I always had to try and suppress a smirk.

Last night, I'd had to pretend to go to sleep, or else they'd have seen me grinning like crazy. Talulah had said that her neck ached, and Nathan had offered to massage it for her. It had been absolutely adorable, and if I hadn't of wanted them to have a little alone time, I'd probably have been cheeky and asked him for one too.

My limbs were constantly aching throughout the day, and sometimes a dull throbbing ache in my legs would wake me up at night, as well as the constant ache of my neck. The training was intense, and with the knowledge that Eric could appear at any moment, I didn't even stop for a second, in fear that he would pick on me again.

Every time I thought about what had happened during the first knife throwing session, I felt uneasy. It probably wouldn't have bothered me that Eric had touched me if he had been a bit gentler. The way he had grabbed my hips had hurt, and it worried me that he was okay with being so rough with people. I doubted that Four would have done it that hard.

Luckily, Eric had left me alone since then, although I had the feeling that it was because he hadn't seen me with Talulah. I wasn't normally one to ditch my friends, but Eric scared me, and I was kind of doing her a favour anyway. Talulah paired up to work with Nathan most of the time, and I worked with the Erudite, Freddie, that had previously been Nathan's partner. Freddie was surprisingly strong, and I felt that he helped me to improve by constantly urging me to hit harder, stating that I wouldn't hurt anyone with the amount of effort I put in.

Today was another one of those days. Freddie and I were on a mat a few metres away from another pair, practising punches and blocking them. I threw a punch towards Freddie's cheek, and he instantly blocked it.

"You're going to have to hit harder again, Jac!" He told me. "I could take you out in a second."

"Oh yeah?" I challenged, launching another punch towards his stomach, putting more force behind it.

He blocked it, but I had only narrowly missed, the left side of my knuckles swiping across the material of his shirt. "Better, but you're going to have to try harder!"

I grinned and quickly lifted my leg to kick his side that was exposed from where he was protecting his stomach. It knocked him sideways slightly, but he managed to grip ahold of my leg and twist slightly, causing me to lose my balance and fall onto my back.

I frowned and grumbled. "I hate it when you do that."

He chuckled and released my leg, standing up properly before offering me his hand. I took it with my right and stood up, rubbing my backside with my left.

"You're getting good now, but I'm still quicker than you." He stated, grinning at me, then his eyes moved behind me to look at the entrance to the Pit.

I glanced over my shoulder to see that Eric had entered the room, and was walking towards the group, talking with Four.

I sighed, and turned back to Freddie. "Lets go again?"

He looked back at me and nodded. "Okay." He ran a hand through his light brown hair, then placed his fists up in front of him.

I mimicked his stance, slowly moving around him. He threw a punch towards my shoulder, but I dodged it and quickly threw one towards his stomach. He blocked it. I was about to give him a punch to the face, but paused when an announcement was made.

"Initiates!" Eric called out. "Gather round, we're going to put your skills to the test."

We all walked towards him, and the small square ring on his and Four's left.

"You've had four days to practise these techniques on each other, so let's see how you put them to work when you're working with someone you're not as friendly with." Four spoke up, a chalk board in his hands.

"There is only seven of you, meaning that one of you will not be fighting today, but don't think you're off the hook. You'll be doing more training with the bags." Eric said, gesturing to the orange punch bags behind him. "Those of you that are fighting, you will fight until one of you concedes."

"We will announce who wins each round." Four spoke, showing the board to Eric.

"First up, Jac and Amiee." Eric announced. "Eddie, you're not fighting."

My heart started to pound._ I was first yet again_. And Amiee wasn't a particularly nice girl. She was a good few inches taller than me, and had a good form with a pretty face. However, she had a bad attitude. She hung around with the other Candor boy, James, and they sneered at everyone around them. If we did something they disliked, they'd point it out, without sugar coating it, and it could make you feel incredibly small and frail.

I slowly approached the ring, stepping up on it and standing opposite Amiee. She glared at me, her eyes determined, and full of hatred that had come from no where.

I positioned myself properly, fists out in front of me, one foot behind me, and took a deep breath.

"You fight to win." Eric stated, from where he had stepped up on the edge of the ring. "Don't forget that."

I looked at Amiee, and it was very clear that she wouldn't be forgetting that statement any time soon.

"You may begin." Eric hopped off of the ring and looked up at us.

My heart began to pound again, and Amiee and I slowly started to circle each other. I needed to find a weak spot and get her there, _I needed to win_.

Amiee lurched forwards and attempted to punch me in the face, but I quickly blocked it and launched a punch to her stomach. She blocked it, so I took a step back before trying it again, which she blocked once more.

Suddenly, a hand came out of no where and hit me on the left cheek, causing me to stumble to the right. _How on earth had she managed that?!_

I positioned my fists in front of me again, catching my breath, before sending a hard jab to her chest. It only knocked her back a little bit, and she threw a punch to my side. I jumped to the side and dodged it, lifting my leg to kick her in the stomach. She flew backwards, losing her footing and fell over. I watched as she started to get up again, and panicked, quickly punching her in the face to knock her back down again. She let out a gasp and her hand flew to her nose, where my fist had connected with it. I waited for a few seconds, fists ready, as she wiped the blood away from her nose and stared up at me. She tried to roll over, getting up onto her knees, but I sent a kick to her ribs, causing her to roll back over and lie down.

"Alright, that's enough for me." Four called out. "Winner is Jac!"

A small smile formed on my lips as I dropped my fists, before my conscience caught up with me and I dropped to Amiee's side.

"Are you alright?" I asked, looking at her nose.

She glared at me. "Like you care."

"Of course I care, I didn't realise I was that strong.. Do you want some help up?" I stood up and held my hand out to her.

"Go away, will you?" She snapped and smacked my hand away from her, her other hand clutching her bloody nose. I felt awful.

James made his way over and helped Amiee up, glaring at me.

I slowly backed away from them and walked towards Freddie, Nathan and Talulah, a guilty feeling in my stomach.

Four handed Eric the board as I passed them, before also making his way over to Amiee like James had.

"I didn't realise winning would make me feel so bad..." I mumbled to Talulah, and she placed a comforting hand on my back.

"Next up, Nathan and James." Eric announced, and I watched as Nathan made his way over to the ring. James already appeared very muscly, and it was obvious that he was strong, but I thought that Nathan could beat him if he tried really hard.

Once they were both prepared, Eric announced that they could start. I watched the first few punches, then looked over at the place Amiee had previously stood in._ I hoped she was okay.._

A gasp from Talulah made me concentrate back on the fight. Nathan had been knocked over by James, but luckily, he was quick enough to get back up.

Four entering the room alone caught my attention, and I looked over wondering where Amiee was. He stood next to Eric and they spoke quietly, before Eric's body shook with silent laughter. Four frowned at him and shook his head, then looked up at the fight.

It didn't take much longer for James to concede. Nathan put up a good fight, but a hard blow to the stomach had kept him on the floor, panting breathlessly.

Knowing that James wouldn't help him up, I rushed over and checked if Nathan was okay, before offering him my hand. He used it to pull himself up and thanked me quietly.

"You did good." I told him. "You'll get him next time, I guarantee it!"

He nodded slowly. "I want to kick his ass next time."

I smiled, and the two of us stood at the side of the ring.

Talulah and Freddie were next, we already knew that, so by the time Eric called out their names, they were already prepared to step onto the ring.

I watched Talulah get into position from my place at the side of the ring between Eric and Nathan, and I knew that I didn't need to worry. Talulah would obviously lose, having absolutely no where near as much strength as Freddie, but I knew that he wouldn't beat her to a pulp.

"Start!" Eric called out, and I watched as Talulah started out with a jab to Freddie's ribs.

"He won't hurt her, will he?" Nathan asked quietly.

"You should know the answer to that." I told him, but reassured him anyway. "Of course he won't, but he will win."

Nathan nodded, and we both continued to watch the fight in silence, both of us feeling fairly calm with this one.

As I watched, my mind kept wandering back to my fight. I felt awful that Amiee had taken such a beating, but I also had no idea where on earth my strength had come from.

The thought of Amiee kept nagging away in the back of my head for the next few moments, so in the end I took a step closer to the two instructors on my right.

Although I was closer to Eric, I didn't particularly want to talk him, so I leant forwards slightly to look at Four.

"Four, is Amiee okay?" I questioned.

Both of their eyes turned from the fight to look down at me.

"Yeah she'll be fine." Four answered, then looked back up at Talulah and Freddie.

Eric's eyes remained on me.

I swallowed and slowly nodded, then stood up properly.

"You broke her nose." Eric informed me, a smirk on his lips.

"What?" I mumbled, my eyebrows raised a little._ Surely I hadn't hit that hard?!_

He chuckled darkly. "You're good. Stronger than you know."

_Was that a compliment?_

"Keep it up." He spoke once more, before looking up at the fight again.

I turned back to the ring and frowned. I had broken Amiee's nose, and he was basically congratulating me for it? Did he not have any sympathy for anyone? Was he really that dark that he enjoyed people getting hurt? I had so many questions in my head about him, he was mysterious, enigmatic, unlike Four who I understood fairly simply.

Four was a private person, avoided answering questions about himself, but he clearly had a conscience, and could be a nice guy.

But Eric? I had no clue. He was scary, and intimidating and appeared to be rather cruel... And I couldn't work him out. Could he be a nice guy once you get to know him? I'd never seen Eric with any of his friends, unlike Four, who I had seen in the dining hall with a few others, looking just like a regular guy... Did Eric even have friends? Was he a Dauntless leader because of how cruel he is? Was I just reading him all wrong?

All this thinking was making my head pound.

* * *

That night I actually went out to the Pit with Talulah and Nathan. Amiee and James had stayed in the accommodation, and I didn't want to be around them, feeling guilty for breaking Amiee's nose.

I was certain that Nathan and Talulah would get together soon. They had exchanged little glances and smiles when they thought that I wasn't looking, and eventually I'd decided to give them their own space. I'd told them that I wanted to go and look for some decent make up, and I knew that Nathan wouldn't want to come. The pair of them had smiled and said goodbye, before wandering off into the crowds.

I hadn't been lying when I'd said that I wanted to look at make up. In fact I wanted to look at everything, I'd not had the chance to explore yet.

I headed towards a shop with a clothes rack displayed in the window and decided to have a nosy around. It turned out that I liked most of the items in there, and I could have cried at the fact that I couldn't buy them all.

"I love that." A voice came from beside me, and I turned to look at the redhead woman stood beside me. She looked like she worked here. I looked back down at the black jumpsuit in my hand. "You should try it on."

"You think?" I asked, fingering the soft material.

"Yeah! You've got a great figure, it'll suit you."

I hesitated for a second. Did I want to waste my points on a jumpsuit? I guess I did need some more clothes...

"Okay." I nodded and pulled it off of the rack, looking around for a place to change.

The redhead pointed towards the changing rooms. "You can change over there."

I headed into the changing room, and stripped off, before pulling on the jumpsuit. It was tight, figure hugging, and had slits at my waist. There was a low v-neck line and I figured I'd have to wear it without a bra, unless I could find a skin coloured one.

"You got it on yet?" The woman called out.

"Yeah! One second!" I replied, and stared at myself in the mirror. I'd never worn anything like it before... But it definitely made me feel good.

I hesitated for a second, before pulling the curtain open. The woman looked up at me, and a smile spread across her lips.

"You look fabulous!" She cried.

"You really think so?" I asked. "You're not just saying it to make a sale?"

"No not at all, it looks really good on you!" She told me. "I'll even give you a few points off if you like?"

"Really?" I questioned. "Why would you do that?"

"You're an initiate, you need all the things you can get!" She smiled. "Are you keeping it on? I can scan it whilst you're wearing it."

I hesitated again, did I really need to wear it right now?

"Go on... Show off your figure!" She encouraged.

I sighed. "Okay. Yeah, I'll leave it on."

She grinned. "Grab your things, then come over to the counter."

I'd sorted out the payment for the jumpsuit, and the woman -who's name I had learned to be Una- had given me a bag to put my other items in, then went in search of some other goodies. It had been a while since I'd owned a nice pair of shoes, and worn make-up... So I felt like I needed to treat myself.

I'd spotted an interesting looking shop, when I heard my name being called.

"Jacquetta!"

The only person that knew my full name was Lu, so I instantly knew that it was her.

I turned around to see her sat on a platform with a few older members of Dauntless. "I prefer Jac.." I reminded her, smiling.

"Sorry, sorry.. Jac." She returned the gesture and smiled back at me. "Come and join us?"

I looked towards the shop I was headed towards, then back at Lu. I suppose the shop wasn't going anywhere.. I could look later. "Sure."

She held out her hand for me, and I took it. She pulled me up onto the platform, then looked me up and down. "I love what you're wearing!"

"Thank you. I just brought it." I told her, looking down at the tight material that was wrapped around my body.

"Good choice!" She smiled, then turned to the group behind her. "Jac, this is the usuals, guys, this is Jac."

They all looked up and smiled at me, some of them saying hello.

"You'll figure out who they all are eventually." She sat down next to a blonde woman, and picked up a bottle. "Do you want a drink?"

I looked at the bottle. "What is it?"

"Alcohol..." She said, raising an eyebrow.

"Lu! You can't give an initiate alcohol!" A man to my left spoke. I turned to look at him, to find that he had tanned skin, was fairly muscly and had a short mop of fair hair.

"Why not? It's not like she's going to get wrecked on one bottle, plus Four wouldn't care anyway?" Lu replied.

The blonde woman snorted. "I can just imagine Four's face when a hungover initiate walks in tomorrow morning!"

Lu giggled, and I heard the man sigh.

"I wasn't referring to Four." He stated. "Eric's overseeing their training remember?"

I rolled my eyes. _Why did everything revert back to Eric?_

Lu noticed my eye roll, and laughed some more, holding the bottle out to me. "She doesn't care."

I grabbed the bottle, then sat down opposite her.

"She'll care when Eric is punishing her ass, and you'll care when he gets on your back for it." The man muttered, taking a sip from his own bottle.

I rolled my eyes again and took a swig from the drink. "Being in the same room as him is a punishment already, I doubt it can get much worse."

Lu and a few others laughed.

"See?!" Lu cried and grabbed another bottle from a bag by her feet. "She'll be fine."

The man rolled his eyes. "If you say so."


	4. Chapter 4

Lu had been wrong, and her fair haired friend had been so correct that it frustrated me.

I'd drank perhaps a bit more than I should have last night, and Lu'd had to walk me back to the accommodation at midnight, constantly telling me to shut up because I was talking too loudly.

With the group, I'd managed to make my way through a good amount of bottles, talking my way into being given more. The fair-haired man, who's name had turned out to be Calvin, had taken a few of the bottles away from me warning me that I wouldn't feel good in the morning, and once I was sober, I'd want to thank him, but I'd always managed to get another from somewhere else.

I awoke to the clanging of metal like every morning, Four shouting for us to wake up. My head pounded, and I'd felt incredibly nauseous the second that I sat up.

"Wow, you look..." Talulah spoke, pausing for a second. "...Rough."

I frowned and looked at her. "Oh thanks."

She smiled sheepishly. "I'm sorry, but you really need to look in the mirror.. and have a shower."

"Don't I know it." I threw the sheets back to stand up, and realised that I was wearing my night clothes, but I had no idea how I got them on.

"Did you drink last night?" Talulah questioned.

"Yes... I wish I hadn't now." I grumbled and stood up, pushing my hair out of my face. I grabbed the things that I needed and headed towards the bathroom, muttering to myself. "I wish I'd listened to Calvin." 

* * *

I freshened up a bit, and tied my hair in a tight bun on top of my head, before changing into my jumpsuit that I'd only worn for a few hours last night. Talulah waited for me, and we walked to the dining hall together.

We were just around the corner from it, when I heard Lu's voice. "Oi, you drunken mess!"

I looked over my shoulder, heat rushing to my cheeks. "Don't..." I grumbled.

She laughed and caught up to Talulah and I. "Do you have a headache?"

"It's thumping." I complained.

She laughed again. "That's what you'll get for drinking a lot... How much do you remember?"

"Uhm..." I thought about it for a second. "Sweet-talking your friends into giving me more, Calvin confisgating it, falling off of my chair and you telling me to shut up on the way to bed."

"Not a great amount then." She grinned. "Let's hope we don't bump into Calvin this morning, he'll definitely rub it in that he was right."

I rolled my eyes. "Just what I want."

She laughed once more and looked at Talulah. "You should have joined us."

Talulah shook her head. "After seeing the state that she woke up in this morning, I don't think it's a very good idea."

Lu smirked. "Did anyone else notice her? What about Four?"

"No I don't think so... Four didn't really stick around after he woke us up."

"Oh..." Lu shrugged. "You've still got that to come as well then, Jac!"

I groaned. "I'm never agreeing to hang out with you again."

Lu scoffed. "You'll come back for more... Everyone comes back for more!"

She and Talulah giggled, and I sighed, looking around as we entered the dining hall.

"Mm, breakfast smells good!" Talulah exclaimed, as she skipped towards a table. _I didn't agree_. My stomach had started doing flips.

Lu and I followed her to the table and sat down. I poured myself a cup of water, and sipped it slowly, the nausea from earlier reforming itself inside of me.

I watched as the two of them started to fill up plates, eager to fill themselves. I swallowed, then took another sip from my cup.

The side of the bench that I was sat on bounced, and I looked beside me to see that Isla had taken a seat. "Good morning all!" She chirped.

"Morning!" Lu smiled at her. "Did you hear about last night's antics?"

"I did indeed." She grinned and looked at me.

"Have you also come to tell me how bad I look?" I grumbled.

She shook her head. "Of course not, everyone ends up feeling rough the first time. I just wanted to ask if you were prepared to do it again."

"No. Never." I sipped my drink again.

She laughed. "Luckily for you, I don't think Four's heard the news yet. Maybe you could have a word with him and tell him that you're feeling ill, see if it'll get you out of any heavy work."

"But it's all self inflicted!" Lu cried. "He's not going to be sympathetic."

"I'll just blame it all on you then." I told her.

She narrowed her eyes. "Don't you dare!" She looked up at Isla. "You're not supposed to help her get away with it Isla, you're an instructor too!"

Isla smiled and shrugged. "I'm one of the people friendly ones."

Lu rolled her eyes and bit into a piece of fruit.

"Isla." A deep voice came from behind me, and without looking, I knew who it was.

"Eric. What can I help you with?" Isla twisted her head to look at him, and I sunk into my seat a little, putting my head down.

"I need you to do me a favour." He replied, perching on the edge of the bench the other side of Isla.

"What is it?" She asked, and reached across to grab something to eat.

"Well..." Eric started to explain, and I looked at Lu, not wanting to be nosy by listening to Eric and Isla's conversation.

Lu was looking at me, a small smirk present on her lips. She knew that looking this rough in front of Eric was risky, and if he noticed - as Calvin so kindly put it last night- he would punish my ass, and get on her back for allowing me to drink. I frowned.

Isla picked up an omelette and placed it on her plate. The smell of it wafted towards me, and as the smell hit me, I felt the bile rise up my insides. I took a deep breath, and covered my nose, trying to ignore the sickly feeling, but it didn't work.

I looked back at Lu, to notice that her face had dropped and she could tell that I was feeling sick. I took another deep breath and looked away from her, stupidly looking back at Isla, who was just putting a bit of the omelette into her mouth.

"I'm going to vomit..." I mumbled, before gagging and clapping a hand tightly over my mouth, jumping up from the table to find the nearest toilet. As I ran away, I heard Lu's quiet laugh, a gasp from Talulah and a small 'oops' from Isla. 

* * *

I was sat beside the toilet in the initiates accomodation, after spending god knows how long throwing up in one of the public toilets and rushing to a more private place to throw up yet again. Luckily, no one was in the accomodation, but I was certain that I was now late for training. I sighed and wiped my mouth with a bit of tissue, dropping it into the toilet, before clambering to my feet and walking towards the sink. I washed my hands, then splashed my face with water, and patted it dry with some more tissue.

The sound of the door opening made me frown. It was probably someone been sent to inform me that I was late... if Four hadn't known that I had gotten myself incredibly drunk last night, he definitely knew now, and so did Eric.

I put the now wet piece of tissue into the toilet and flushed it as I heard footsteps approaching.

"I must admit, I never expected you to be the first." It was Eric.

I frowned again and turned around to see him leant against the wall a few feet away.

"The first what?" I asked.

"To get trashed and try to hide a hangover." He answered. "I would have thought that a previous Erudite would have had more sense than that."

"Yeah, well, there's a reason that I'm not an Erudite anymore." I muttered and crossed my arms.

He tilted his head. "I guess that's obvious."

"Are you just here to gloat, or do you actually want to tell me something?" I questioned, surprising myself with the confidence I had to ask that.

He smirked. "A bit of both."

"Right." I mumbled, and slid past him to go into the bedroom.

He turned to face me. "Four knows why you're going to be late."

"Great." I muttered, and searched under my bed for my wash bag.

"And you'll still be fighting today. He's got no sympathy for you.. And neither have I, so I'm going to punish you for drinking on a training night."

_This day was getting better and better._

"You've got to get up early and help set up in the mornings, as well as stay behind to clear up."

"Anything else?" I questioned sarcastically, heading back into the bathroom.

"Not that I can think of. But if I want something done, you'll be doing it." He answered.

I rolled my eyes, knowing that he couldn't see. "What did your last slave die of?" I muttered.

He chuckled deeply and I looked over my shoulder at him. "Not listening to me."


	5. Chapter 5

**My apologies to everyone who read the 'chapter five' that I posted earlier. I accidentally clicked on the wrong document! Silly me for not double-checking. Anyways, here's the real chapter, and sorry again! Thank you so much for your reviews! **

* * *

Just as I thought that I'd started to feel a little better, I'd arrived at training with Eric to find that I had been set up to fight with James. I had a feeling that Eric had some how planned it, being the seemingly evil guy that he was, knowing that James would want to get me back for breaking his best friend's nose.

I definitely hadn't been wrong about the last part. James' deathly glare when I stepped up onto the ring had my stomach churning all over again. I very nearly turned around and begged the two instructors on my hands and knees to let me out of this one, but that was a cowardly thing to do, and I wasn't a coward.

"I'll go easy on you, seeings as you've not stopped throwing up." James sneered. "I'll just break a few bones then leave you be."

My heart pounded and I positioned myself, ready for his attack. "Bring it on. I can handle myself, your buddy learnt that yesterday." I sneered back, the faux confidence in me sounding sickly sweet.

He threw his head back and laughed, so I took the opportunity to quickly jab him in the throat.

He choked on his laugh and spluttered, then lurched forwards to grab me. He wrapped his hands tightly around my wrists, which I tried to shake loose, before he yanked me towards him and stuck his leg behind me. The next thing I knew, he'd released my wrists and shoved me backwards, causing me to trip over his leg and land on my back.

I laid on the floor breathlessly staring up at him, wondering what his next move would be. I wouldn't have the time to get up and be prepared for whatever he did next, and I feared that if he kicked me in the stomach I might just throw up everywhere.

James circled me a few times, and I heard Eric sigh impatiently.

"Stop playing with her." He muttered. "You're supposed to be fighting."

James looked up at Eric, and I took the chance to roll to the side and boot him in the back of the knees as hard as I possibly could. He jerked forwards and fell down onto his knees, snapping his head round to look at me. I sat up and shoved my foot into the small of his back, so that he fell onto his stomach, however, he placed his hands down and pushed back up.

I quickly scrambled back to my feet, and watched as he did so too. I didn't waste a second, and swung a punch to his face, hitting him under the chin, the sound of his teeth smacking together making me cringe.

He growled and I felt the back of his hand hit my left cheek, exactly how Amiee had done it yesterday, and yet again I stumbled to the side.

Without a second thought, I swung to punch him again and he blocked it, before kicking me in the left side, a whimper escaping my lips.

As I tried to steady myself again, something hard connected with the right side of my jaw, knocking me off balance so I fell to my knees right in front of Four, drops of blood dripping onto the floor from somewhere on my face. I glanced up at him as I felt a harsh tug on my bun, pulling me backwards onto my ass. I clenched my teeth together and let out a hiss of pain, before reaching around to grab James' wrists, squeezing and scratching them as hard as I could to get them off of my hair.

_So he was going to fight dirty? Fine._

I kicked my leg up as high as I could, managing to catch James on the chin, knocking him off guard, feeling him release my hair. I then proceeded to roll over backwards and hop to my feet, before turning around and swinging as many punches at him as I could.

In fact, I got so carried away with swinging punches at him, he had the opportunity to launch himself at me and knock me over backwards. Instead of letting go, he fell heavily on top of me, and the back of my head hit the floor with a sickening crack.

My vision was becoming blurry due to tears forming in my eyes, and it was hard to breath with him on top of me. I lifted my arms to hit his back and sides as he repositioned himself to be sat on me, but they were just feeble attempts and hadn't made him flinch a bit.

"You can't let this continue!" Talulah's exclamation filled my ears, and I silently agreed with her.

James pulled his fist back, and a second later, it connected with my cheek bone and I let out another whimper. _There was no way on earth I was going to win this one._

I feebly attempted to shove him off of me, the final thing I did before his fist thumped into my face again, the tears completely clouding my vision now.

"Right, that's enough!" Four called out. "James wins."

James placed his hands on my shoulders and purposely pushed incredibly hard to help himself up, before walking off.

I attempted to roll over, but jerked straight back into the position I was in already, feeling like I could vomit again, and like my limbs were about to fall off. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut and took a deep breath.

"Jac!" Talulah's voice filled my ears again and I opened my eyes to find her and Nathan leaning over me with worried expressions on their faces.

"If this is the punishment I get... I'm never drinking again." I grumbled, then took another deep breath.

They smiled, and Talulah giggled with relief that I wasn't dead or something.

"Do you need help up?" Nathan questioned.

I shook my head. "I'm fine, it'll just take me a second." I lied. I really just wanted someone to scoop me up and tuck me into bed with a shit load of painkillers.

"Okay.." Nathan replied hesitantly, then stepped back out of the way. Talulah stepped to the side slightly, and I gritted my teeth together before sitting up, my stomach lurching and my head spinning.

I brought a hand up to the back of my head, where a sharp pain shot through it, and let out a hiss of pain.

"She's not fine." Talulah told Nathan, then looked at me. "You're not fine."

"I am." I spoke through my gritted teeth and squeezed my eyes shut again, only opening them when I heard footsteps approach from behind.

"She alright?" Four questioned.

"No, she's not." Talulah stated, before I could answer for myself.

He sighed. "Nathan, grab an arm." He ordered, and the next thing I knew both of my arms were wrapped around each of their necks, their arms around my waist, being lifted off of the floor.

* * *

I awoke in the infirmary a while later. At first I didn't have a clue what was going on, but then it all came flooding back and the back of my head started to thump.

"Oh good, you're awake."

I turned my head to see a middle aged Dauntless woman stood a few feet away.

"I eh.. Yeah.." I mumbled, my jaw aching.

She smiled. "You're lucky to not have a concussion, you must have a very sturdy head."

"Always a good thing I guess."

"Are you in pain? I can give you something to numb it."

I nodded and she disappeared towards the end of the room for a moment, before coming back a few seconds later.

She held out a cup of water and two pills.

I took them from her, and quickly swallowed them, gulping down the water afterwards. "Thank you."

She smiled again. "Right, you're free to go.. But Four asked me to tell you to head straight back to the Pit when you awoke, something to do with a punishment."

I closed my eyes and sighed. I'd forgotten that Eric wanted to me help Four clear up.

"Come back here once your finished and I'll give you enough pain killers for the rest of the day and tomorrow, and if you feel dizzy or anything at all, don't hesitate to come back. You may not have a concussion, but from the looks of it you hit your head pretty hard."

I opened my eyes and nodded. "Okay, I will." I shuffled towards the edge of the bed that I was laid on, wincing as my limbs throbbed. "Thank you again."

"No problem sweetie." The woman smiled, then turned away from me. "Enjoy your punishment!"

I rolled my eyes and slowly got to my feet, feeling like my body had aged about sixty years in the past few hours.

As I left the infirmary, I looked up at the clock to see that it was five to six. By the time I got to the Pit, everyone would just be leaving... At least I wouldn't have to show my face to anyone except Four and possibly Eric. I bet they'd both feel pretty smug.

* * *

As predicted, the last few people were leaving as I arrived. Eric and Four were stood beside the table of knives, looking at the chalkboard, so I headed over to them, waiting for their reactions to my more than likely black face.

Eric heard me approach first, and a grin appeared on his face as he looked up at me. "Well that is one huge shiner on your face, initiate!"

Four looked up and his eyebrows rose at the sight of me.

"Don't be too happy about it, Eric. I am actually in pain." I muttered, pausing the opposite side of the table to them. "You wanted this to happen."

Eric raised an eyebrow, his piercing moving upwards as he did so. "I wanted you to learn a lesson, but I didn't want you to end up with a battered face."

I frowned. "Well you could have always stopped him after I smacked my head on the floor."

He chuckled. "But where's the fun in that?"

I glared at him. "You're a sick, twisted man!" I cried. "How on earth can you find fun in someone being beaten up?!"

"Jac..." Four spoke quietly, almost as if he was reminding me who I was talking to.

I scoffed and shook my head, turning away from Eric, to look at all of the knives on the floor by the targets.

"Careful, Jacquetta." Eric warned, his voice low and threatening. I snapped back around to look at him, fuming at the way he used my full name, my head whooshing as I did so.

I brought a hand up to my forehead and squeezed my eyes shut, before opening them to look at Eric. I wasn't in the mood to hang about and voice my opinions anymore. "Do you actually want me to do my punishment? Or can I just go and sort my head out?" I asked bluntly.

"Help Four put everything away, then you're done for tonight." Eric replied, staring intently at me.

I slowly nodded and turned to get the knives from the floor.

"See you later." Eric spoke to Four, earning a quiet mumble in reply, then left the Pit.

Four and I collected the equipment in silence, until Eric was completely gone, then Four approached me and took the knives out of my hand. "You're free to go now, stay out of sight until dinner time, okay? I don't want Eric to catch you."

I let out a breath of relief and half-heartedly smiled at him. "Thank you, Four." I turned and started to head back to the infirmary to collect my pills, but Four grabbed my arm and stopped me.

"You need to be careful around him, Jac." Four told me sternly. "He is a nasty piece of work.. And for some reason he's interested in you becoming his new play toy, don't think I've not noticed the way he specifically picks on you and mutters quiet things into your ear."

I frowned and stared at Four, confused. _Was he really saying this?_

"He might turn you into a perfect little Dauntless, but he'll make your life hell whilst doing it."


	6. Chapter 6

I'd tried to ignore what Four had said, knowing that I'd over think it... But in all honesty, he'd _scared_ me. Ridiculous, I know, but Four had never seemed the kind of person to warn someone away from something unless it was important and for their own safety. Just like Eric, he had a brave, dark persona about him, but I felt that I could see through him a little and he wasn't a bad person on the inside. I knew that he wouldn't scare me like that unless I needed to know.

After collecting my pills, I headed straight back to the accommodation and curled up on my bed. Talulah had watched me come in from where she was perched on the end of Nathan's bed, before approaching me a few moments later.

"You okay? You took quite a beating today."

I nodded and looked up at her, patting the gap between my knees and face. "I'm fine. I think I just need some rest."

She smiled softly and sat where I had patted. "Do you want me to bring you some food after we've all finished eating?"

"Yes please..." I wasn't in the mood to go to the dining hall, show off my battered and bruised body, talk to people, see Four, and possibly see Eric... I didn't have anything left in me.

"Okay." She nodded. "We should be back in about an hour... I'll avoid bringing egg." She joked, referring to my sickness from the smell of Isla's omelette this morning.

I scrunched my face up, the ache in my jaw not as strong anymore. "Yeah, don't bring that." I agreed, then smiled. "And I don't mean to sound cheeky, but could you grab me some ice from somewhere? I don't want to have a swollen face anymore."

She smiled. "I can indeed. Won't be long." She softly patted my arm, then got up and walked back over to Nathan's bed.

I rolled over and closed my eyes, trying to block out the sound of anyone else.  
Today had not been my lucky day. In fact, I just wanted to forget all about it... And for the first time since being in the Dauntless compound, I started to miss my parents. I missed the way my Mom would cuddle me if I felt low, and read to me whilst subconsciously playing with my hair. The way my Dad would convince me using every fact he could muster that a few cuts and bruises wouldn't kill me if I hurt myself.

I felt tears begin to sting in my eyes as I remembered how forgiving they'd been when I'd messed up everything the Erudite thought to be simple. How they hadn't given up on me when they finally realised that I wouldn't succeed in their Faction, and tried to set me up with a comfortable life in Amity. And then their faces when I transferred to Dauntless... They were scared for me. And they were right to have been. 

* * *

"Jac... Jac!" It was the sound of Four's voice that filled my ears when I awoke.

I groaned and opened one eye, seeing him looking down at me. "What?"

"Get up." He ordered.

I frowned. "What's the time?"

"Nine. I woke everyone up half an hour ago." He informed me. He's woken everyone up a bit late? "We're going on a field trip... if you don't get up, you'll miss it, and trust me, you look like you need some fresh air."

I rolled my eyes. "Is that your way of telling me how gorgeous I look first thing in the morning?" I muttered sarcastically.

A smirk spread across his lips. "Come on, everyone else is already eating."

"What?" I frowned and slowly sat up, realising that the accommodation was empty, with the exception of Four and I. The pain relief must have completely knocked me out.

Four ignored my question and pulled the covers off of me. "Up!"

"Okay, okay." I grumbled and shuffled towards the edge of the bed, my entire body aching. "Give me fifteen minutes to shower, get ready and take some meds and I'll be ready."

"You've got ten." He turned and walked towards the door. "We'll be waiting in the dining hall." 

I arrived in the dining hall just over ten minutes later, my freshly washed hair in a high ponytail, hanging down my back. I had a packet of pills in my hand, and I just needed a drink to take them with.

Talulah waved me over to a table where she was sat with Nathan, Freddie, Calvin, Lu, a few others that I recognised from the other night, and right at the very end on his own was Four. I smiled at her, but instead of sitting at her end of the table, I sat in the gap between Lu and Four.

"Good morning sunshine!" Lu chirped, grinning at me. "You look like you've taken a pounding."

"And not in the good way..." A slim tattooed woman added, from where she was sat beside Freddie.

Lu turned and smirked at her.

"No one is ever touching me ever again. No fists in my face, nothing!" I grumbled, pouring myself a cup of water. "And I'm never drinking again either."

Lu laughed.

"Well that will be difficult." Four stated. "You're fighting again tomorrow, the last fight in stage one."

I turned to look at him and sighed. "Can't I be a special exception?"

He shook his head. "Like Eric would agree to that."

I sighed again. "Of course. Because he loves it when I'm battered and bruised."

Four didn't say anything, or show any kind of reaction on his facial features, just looked the other way and sloshed around the water that was in his cup.

"How much trouble did you get into?" Lu asked, and I twisted my head to look back at her. "Talulah said that you were punished, but she didn't know what."

"Eric told me that I have to help Four set up and clear up everyday... and if he has any extra jobs that he wants me to do, I have to do them." I glanced over my shoulder to see who was at the leaders' table. It was empty.

She pulled a face. "So you basically have to lick Eric's ass all the time?"

"I'd much rather kick it." I muttered and popped the pills out of the packet and into my hand.

"Good luck." I heard Four mumble beside me, only loud enough for me to hear, and I almost turned to glare at him before Lu carried on talking.

"He's an asshole, but I don't think he'll give you anything too bad to do."

"I hope not." I took a mouthful of water from my cup, then took the painkillers.

"What did he make you do last night?" Talulah questioned. "I was going to ask you, but you fell asleep and wouldn't wake up when I brought food back for you."

"Sorry.." I felt bad for not waking up when she'd kindly grabbed me something to eat. "I had to pick up all of the knives with Four."

I didn't mention the fact that he let me leave, just in case it got back to Eric.

"See, not too bad!" Lu smiled and engaged herself into another conversation with the tattooed woman about their previous punishments.

I sipped from my cup, then put it down at stared at it. Maybe I should talk to Four about what he told me yesterday? To be fair he hadn't really said much, and I felt as if I deserved to know more.

I glanced at my tanned instructor for a second, internally debating with myself before quietly asking; "Why did you say that last night?"

He looked up and his eyes met mine for a few seconds, before he shook his head. "Not here." He said quietly, then stood up and raised his voice. "Initiates, we're leaving."

I frowned and got to my feet, then stood and waited for Talulah. _If not here, then where?!_ Would he ever actually answer any questions I had about what he told me? 

* * *

Four led us out of the compound and up to the train tracks. We waited on the platform for a while, each of us talking to each other in our small groups.

"Do you know where we're going?" Freddie asked us, getting heads shaken as a reply.

"You don't think he's going to make us jump off of a roof again do you?" Talulah questioned.

I looked over at Four, who was stood towards the end of the platform on his own, staring into the distance. "Well if he does, he won't force you to go first." I told her.

She smiled at the reminder of the first time that we'd met. "Thank god for that!"

The feel of the platform rumbling, and the sound of the train's horn pulled us out of our conversation, and as the train began to approach, we started to run along the platform. Four was the first to jump onto the train, followed by the rest of us.

As I stood up properly, and leant against the car's back wall to support myself, I looked at Four again. _All I wanted to do was talk_. I wanted to know why he thought Eric wanted me as his 'play toy'.

"Jac? Are you okay?" Talulah questioned. "You've been really quiet today."

"I'm fine." I lied.

"You can talk to me, you know, if you're not..."

I smiled at her. "I know, thank you."

She smiled back at me, then turned to look at Freddie and Nathan that were chuckling away at something.

"What are you laughing at?" She questioned.

"What are in those pills that they gave you, Jac?" Nathan asked.

"You keep spacing out!" Freddie cried, and pulled a face, doing a terrible impression of me.

"Whatever it is, it's good shit." I muttered and rolled my eyes, then smiled half-heartedly. "I've just got a lot to think about."

"Like what?" Talulah frowned.

"Nothing, it doesn't matter."

"Yesterday's fight isn't making your doubt yourself is it?" Nathan questioned. "Because you're a damn good fighter, you just had a bad day, you don't need to worry about it."

I shook my head. "Thank you.. But it's not that."

"Then what is it?" Talulah asked.

I shook my head again, ready to tell her that it didn't matter once more, but stopped when Four called out;

"Right, listen up! We're almost there, so the train will be slowing to allow us to get off."

"Where are we going?" Eddie questioned.

"The fence."

I watched as Talulah's eyes widened. A smile spread across her face and she looked at me. "You'll get to see where I grew up!"

I smiled and nodded. "Can you actually see your house from there, or?"

"You can!" She grinned. "It was further out than the rest of the Amity compound because my Father worked on the trucks that brought things in and out." 

* * *

I stared out at the horizon from the top of the fence, where we were all stood. Four had explained what the Dauntless guards did, and we were allowed to look around for a bit, before he took us right to the top.

I wondered what else was out there, other than just farms. Surely we couldn't be the only people?

"I bet there's big monsters out there... Like giant spiders or something!" Nathan said, grinning his head off.

"Spiders aren't scary." Talulah stated, raising an eyebrow.

"That's because you've only seen little ones. The ones out there are huge and will eat you whole!" He exclaimed and spread his arms out wide before enveloping himself around Talulah and pretending to eat her.

She squealed and giggled, and I silently laughed as I watched them.

"He likes to watch people suffer." Four's quiet voice came from behind me, and I jumped, snapping my head around to look at him.

"Shit, you just scared the crap out of me!" I cried.

He held his arms up as if he was surrendering. "Sorry..."

I sighed and shook my head, then looked out at the horizon again. "Are you going to tell me then?"

"Look, I don't want you to get hung up on this..." He said. "But I wanted to warn you. I was in his initiate class, and he was good, really good, and he enjoyed it way too much."

"Were you both Dauntless-born?"

"That's irrelevant." He stated. "Eric was doing great, he ranked first in the first stage, but fell behind on the second and third."

"Who beat him?"

"Me, and a girl called Rita."

I nodded. "Right... but I don't get what this has to do with me..."

"Rita was really good, just like him, but he wanted to win. He manipulated the poor girl, convinced her that her friends were no good for her, that she was useless. In fact he somehow managed to bring up things that upset her so much, that she struggled more with the second stage. She ended up ranking third at the end of it all."

"I still don't understand."

"Let me finish then, Jac!" He muttered, glaring at me. "She was a proper Dauntless after that, really hard-faced and pretty brutal if I'm honest... But earlier on this year she was found dead at the bottom of the Chasm."

My eyes widened. _Well that was a twist of events_. "What happened?"

"The Leader's told everyone that she'd slipped whilst play fighting with a friend. That friend happened to be Eric." He spoke. "They'd argued a few weeks before she was found, tensions between them had been running high. Calvin was close to her, said that she realised how Eric had manipulated her throughout training and wanted to shake off his control over her."

I stared at Four, mouth hanging agape. I tried to speak, but no sound came out.

"That's why I'm telling you to be careful, Jac."

I opened my mouth to speak again, praying that sound would actually come out this time. "So you're saying he killed her? A-and if I don't do what he wants then he'll kill me too?"

He shook his head. "No. I don't know." He sighed. "Just be careful. Don't let him treat you the way that he did Rita."

* * *

On the way back, Four had announced that the first draft of our rankings would be put up as soon as we arrived back. If he'd said anything else, I'd missed it, my mind doing constant circles around the new information that I had received on the fence.

Four thought that Eric had killed a woman. And now I thought about it, Calvin probably agreed with him... And Calvin had tried to protect me from the wrath of Eric a few nights ago. _God, I could have punched myself for being so blind!_

But I weren't to know what he had done.

I knew that he was a dark, cruel man - but never did I think he could be a murderer. How could he carry that burden around with him? I wouldn't have been able to live with myself.

"Jac?" Freddie snapped his fingers in front of my face. "We need to jump!"

I blinked a few times and realised that the train car was empty, except the two of us. "Sorry!" I cried, and ran towards the door, leaping out and landing on my knees.

Freddie landed a second after me and shook his head. "Are you sure you're okay? You're scaring everyone with the way you keep spacing out."

"I'm fine, honestly. I just feel like I need to process everything that's happened, I've not had the chance to stop and think since we arrived."

He nodded. "Alright, well... You know where I am."

I smiled. "Thank you, Freddie."

"No problem."

"Come on you two, I want to see the rankings!" Nathan called out, and I looked up to see him and Talulah stood by the door.

The four of us practically ran all the way to the Pit, stopping half way there for Freddie to give me a piggyback, and arrived just in time to see Four and Eric stand the board up in front of the table.

My heart thumped as we got nearer, and I was unsure whether it was because of the rankings, or being in the same room as a murderer that caused it.

We paused a few metres away from the board, and Freddie dropped me onto my feet. I slowly walked around him, staring at the board as I read it.

1. James.

2. Freddie.

3. _Jac_.

I heard my breath catch in my mouth. I was third. I should have been relieved that I was doing well, but all I could think about was Rita. She came third.

I squeezed my eyes shut for a second, then opened them and continued to read.

4. Aimee.

5. Nathan.

6. Talulah.

7. Eddie.

Poor Talulah. She was almost last.

I turned to hug her, to tell her that she had one fight left and that she could improve, to find that Nathan had already done it. I bit my lip and watched. There was clearly something going on with them.. But I suppose right now wasn't the right time to deduce their current relationship status.

"I told you." It was Eric's voice.

My heart started to thump loudly again as I twisted to look at him. "What?"

"Protecting her won't help you succeed." He looked over my shoulder at Talulah and Nathan. "I'm glad to see you listened."

I frowned. "I'm letting Nathan deal with it right now, but I'm going to try and help her improve."

"How great of you." I noticed the sarcasm in his voice. "You missed two training sessions whilst you were in the infirmary yesterday. I want you to do them today. Meet me back here at three." He turned and walked back towards Four.

I almost shuddered, my skin feeling cold. I didn't want to be alone with him, especially not after everything Four had told me, and I most definitely didn't want to be practising shooting guns with him. He might just lose his temper with me and shoot me in the head, or shove me off of the Chasm like he had Rita.

Any opinion that I had of Eric before had completely changed now. I hated him, or at least the man that I thought he was.


	7. Chapter 7

Three o'clock came around much quicker than I'd have liked. I'd tried my best to join in with the others, and keep my spirits high, but all I could think about was Four's story about Rita. The poor girl, all she'd wanted was to get rid of Eric, and she'd ended up _dead_.

At lunch I'd seen Calvin. He'd sat on the end of our table with Lu and all I could do was stare at him. He'd tried to warn me off with the alcohol thing, completely oblivious to the things that Four had also seen concerning Eric and I, I'm sure if he'd known he'd have been beside himself. I couldn't let myself be controlled by Eric, Calvin would eventually realise and I was certain that the pain of losing his close friend would resurface.

When the Leaders left the dining hall, I stared after them, my eyes boring a hole into Eric's back. _Surely they would have been concerned about what had happened? _Four made it sound as if they didn't care. _What if they didn't?_ They were incredibly ruthless... But I was certain that they didn't condone violence unless it was necessary, and from the way Four had described her, Rita didn't seem like the type of person that would try to kill Eric, only for him to get her instead.

"Jac, it's three." A soft nudge in the ribs, and a whisper from Freddie reminded me that I needed to leave.. And my stomach started to flutter, but not for a good reason.

"Thanks." I got to my feet, and said my goodbyes before heading towards the Pit.

If what I had been told was true, and Eric did want to control me, how would I get out of it? Rebelling against him seemed like a terrible idea, and just doing what I was told would be playing right into his hands. I couldn't win. Not unless I died, or became Factionless, and even then I don't think that I would be winning.

I sighed, and looked up from the floor as I arrived at the entrance to the Pit. Eric was stood towards the back of the room, surrounded by targets, leaning against a table.

His muscular arms were folded firmly across his chest, and he was staring at me. "You're late."

I glanced up at the large clock on the wall. "By two minutes."

"Two minutes longer that I have to be here." He grumbled. "Hurry up."

We started with knife throwing, and I'd tried my hardest to remember the stance that he'd taught me on the first day, and the techniques that Four had taught us. However, as I did this, my mind travelled back to how Eric had grabbed my hips that day and how rough he had been. I shuddered as I realised that grabbing someone roughly wasn't even half of what he was capable of.

"You cold?"

I shook my head. "I'm fine."

He slowly nodded, and I could feel his eyes boring into the side of my face. "Throw again then. Put more power behind it."

I shook out my arms, then positioned myself properly again. I concentrated on the centre of the target, then threw the knife, using more strength. I watched as it hit fairly close to the centre, only off to the left by about an inch.

"That was better." Eric stated and handed me another knife. "Do it again, hit the same spot."

I did as he wanted, and the knife hit the spot a few inches up and to the right of the last one.

"Once more." He ordered, and I took the last knife from him, then threw it. This one bounced off of the target and loudly clattered to the floor. I frowned.

"You weren't trying that time." Eric stated. "Go and collect them."

I didn't argue, just silently walked over to the target and pulled the knives out. "Why are you so concerned with how I rank?" I questioned.

"What?" If I had been looking at him, I would have seen a frown furrow his brows.

"You heard. Why are you concerned with me? You tell me that Talulah won't help me succeed, you make me fight the strongest person in the group when I'm at my weakest, and now you're making me catch up on my knife throwing? I've not seen you pay so much attention to the other initiates."

"I'm not just focusing on you. But as a leader that is overseeing your training, it is my job to help those that aren't working at their full potential."

I frowned. _That was bullshit_. I was working as hard as I possibly could! "I thought that was Four's job. As you just said, you're a leader... so why not just get him to help me instead?"

"Do you have a problem with me?" Eric questioned, and I turned to look at him. He was staring at me, a knife held tightly in his right hand.

"Other than the fact that you enjoyed watching me getting beaten to a pulp yesterday? No, not at all." I grumbled, surprising myself with the confidence that had arisen in me - something which had happened often over the last few days.

He rolled his eyes. "It's tough love, Jacquetta. You won't get far in Dauntless without it."

I clenched my teeth together. "Do not call me Jacquetta."

"I can call you whatever I like."

I glared at him for a second, then scoffed and dropped the knives on the floor. "I'm done here. I can't even deal with this right now." I stepped over the pile of silver on the floor, and headed towards the exit, fuming at how he wouldn't give me a proper answer, and the way he used my full name.

Suddenly, I felt a whoosh of air and a sharp pain in my upper left arm, before hearing a clang behind me. I let out a loud gasp and paused on the spot, snapping my head down to look at my arm. There was a thin slash across the middle of it, blood slowly rising to the surface. I frowned again, and looked behind me in confusion.

It took a few seconds for me to process what had happened, then my breath caught in my throat, and I stared up at Eric breathlessly.

"Y-you just-"

"-Threw a knife at you." He cut me off and finished the sentence. "Yes I did."

"It cut me!" I cried, my right hand coming up to cover the wound.

"I know that. It was meant to." He said, his eyes flicking towards my arm, before meeting mine. He crossed his arms and stared at me. "We're not done, and you most definitely do not just walk out on me."

"So you throw a knife at me?!"

"What did you want me to do? Tackle you?" He muttered.

"You tell me to stop, like a normal person!" I shouted, my voice a few octaves higher than it should have been, it echoing around the room.

It was silent once the Echo finished... And it remained that way for a few moments.

I stared at Eric, unsure of what to do, and he stared back at me, looking as if he was thinking.

"Come here." He ordered quietly, breaking the silence.

I shook my head. "I'm not going anywhere near you." I spoke through clenched teeth.

He sighed. "I want to look at your arm. Come here."

"No..." I moved my hand a little and looked down at my arm. The deep red blood was spread over my pale skin where I had tried to cover it. "I want you to stay away from me."

He took a few slow steps towards me, and I took one back.

"Jac, I won't hurt you again. Let me look at it." _He used my name... And he didn't call me initiate or try to piss me off..._

I stared at him again, searching his face to see if he was being sincere or not, and then I realised that I wouldn't be able to tell. I wonder if he did the same thing to Rita before he killed her.

"Jac.."

I frowned, then slowly approached him, my heart thumping.

He reached out, and when I was close enough, he firmly grasped my arm by my elbow and pulled my hand away from it.

I dropped my blood stained hand to my side and stared at him as he analysed the cut. He lifted his spare hand to touch it, and I winced as I felt his fingertip brush along the edge of it. He was being surprisingly gentle.

"I'd say that I'm sorry, but I'm not." He stated, looking up at me. "You have to realise that you can't give up when things get heated, or don't go the way you planned. And if you get cut, you turn around and fight back."

I frowned. "So what? You want me to punch you or something? Rip out a piercing?"

I watched as his jaw tensed. "No, but that's what you should do next time you're in this position."

"Right." I looked down at my arm that he was still holding, his finger tips softly placed a few centimetres away from the slice that he'd caused.

"The cut isn't too deep, but from the looks of it, you're a bleeder. You'll have to get it bandaged." He told me.

"Will it scar?" I questioned.

"Probably."

_Great_. A permanent reminder of Eric in the form of a scar on my upper arm, just what I wanted for the rest of my life.

"Let me clear up, then I'll walk you to the Infirmary."

"We're done here?"

He nodded. "Your knife skills are actually pretty good, and the firing range is being used right now, so I have nothing else for you to practise."

"So I wasted an afternoon..." I mumbled.

"No. You've definitely improved." He told me.

"Right. Well, at least I'll be able to have a nap before dinner."

"I said we were done here, not that you were free to go." 

* * *

We left the Infirmary twenty minutes later. Eric had stood impatiently tapping his foot whilst the same middle aged Dauntless woman cleaned and bandaged my arm, then practically dragged me out of the place the second that she was done. If I wasn't so scared of speaking up around him now, I'd have pointed out how rude he was.

I followed him through the compound silently, and he didn't stop to ponder at all for a second. We walked straight past the dining hall, straight past the kitchens, and up into the Dauntless members' accommodation. I'd never been up there before, I'd never had a reason to until now.

I followed Eric up three flights of stairs, before he turned into a corridor and stopped at the fourth door down. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a key, then started to unlock the door.

My heart thumped. I had been scared of being alone with him in a public place, never mind now being alone in a room three flights up.

He pushed open the door, and held it for me, gesturing for me to walk in. I stepped through the door way, and explored the room with my eyes. It was fairly large, with a living area next to the large windows on the right, an arched doorway that looked like it led into a kitchen, and a door to what I assumed to be the bedroom. It was fairly clean, with the exception of the odd shirt slung on the back of a chair and a cup sat on the table, and it was nothing like I expected it to be.

_He'd brought me to his apartment._

"Is this yours?" I questioned quietly.

"Yeah." He kicked the door shut with his foot. "I'm hardly here though."

I slowly nodded and looked over my shoulder at him.

"I thought it could do with a change though." He told me. "No one would've offered to help me paint, so you're going to."

I frowned. "So part of my punishment is painting your apartment?"

He nodded and walked into the kitchen, before returning with a pot of paint, and a paint brush. He handed them to me, then nodded at the wall where the door was. "Get started then."

I looked down at the items that he'd just handed me. "Are you not helping?"

"I've got a meeting." He told me, and it had almost escaped my mind that he was a leader. In fact, I'd forgotten everything the moment that I'd stepped into his apartment. I'd even forgotten about poor Rita and I shuddered. I didn't want to be his slave, and I didn't want to spend the next few hours painting his walls for him, but I also didn't want to speak out and have people find my body at the bottom of the Chasm tomorrow morning.

"You're leaving me here alone?"

He blinked at me. "Yeah..."

"How do you know I won't steal something?" There was that surprise confidence again..

He rolled his eyes. "You wouldn't dare."

I shrugged. "I guess I wouldn't..."

"Right. Well, no one should come up, so you won't have any surprise visitors, and help yourself to a drink, nothing more." He told me, then walked towards the door.

"How long will you be?" I asked quietly.

"As long as it takes." He answered, then gave me one last look before leaving and shutting the door behind him.

I put the painting equipment on the floor, then sighed. I almost felt as if I was being held against my will... I wanted to get out of here and be with the other initiates, but I knew I had to be here, or Eric might lose his temper again.

I stared at the wall I would be painting and frowned. The lazy ass should do it himself.. But that didn't seem likely to happen at all.

I sighed, and grabbed the equipment, placing it on the table. I yanked the lid off of the paint, the sore spot on my arm pounding as I did so, then picked the brush up and decided to get a move on. The quicker this got done, the quicker I'd be able to escape the wrath of Eric.

As I was painting, a few photographs sat on the table caught my eye. I wandered over and carefully used one finger to spread them out so I could take a look. The first one was of a young man and an older woman, and it took me a few seconds to realise that the man was Eric. He looked different in this picture, with no piercings and no visible tattoos. I looked closer at the woman beside him, and I almost gasped when I realised who she was. It was Professor Karen Mathewson, she worked with my Father in the labs in Erudite... She must be his Mother, they looked alike. I couldn't believe I'd never known that she had a son. The second photo was of a young redhead that looked about my age. She was laid on a bed on her stomach, in shorts and a vest, which had rolled up to reveal her lower back. She looked as if she was laughing at something behind the camera, a large open-teeth smile on her face. The next photograph was similar, of the redhead again in the same scene, just closer. She had her hand up, and it looked like she was trying to stop the photographer, still laughing. The photo beneath this one was clearly taken by her. She was smiling at the camera, stood with Eric, his arm around her shoulders, looking down at her with a smile on his face. His smile looked genuine, and even with all the piercings and tattoos, he looked less intimidating. The last photograph surprised me. The redhead was stood in the Pit with her arms slung around another Dauntless man. _It was Calvin_. He had a grin on his face, and his arms around the woman's waist, as she kissed his cheek. _Why would Eric have this photo?_ It took me a moment to realise that I had never seen this woman around the compound. Where was she? Was it Rita? 

* * *

He returned about an hour later, startling me, as well as saving my skin. I'd been stood on one of the stalls from his kitchen, trying to reach the top of the wall, when he entered the room. The sound of the door had made me jump, and I'd span to look at him, before losing my balance and letting out a loud screech as I fell backwards. Luckily for me, he'd been quick enough to grab me, and I'd landed safely (_or not so safely_..) in his arms.

"It's becoming ridiculous how often you're getting close to being injured." He stated, staring down at me.

I caught my breath as I looked up at him, before trying to wriggle away from him. "Yeah well, they've all been your fault." I answered bluntly.

He raised an eyebrow and clearly tried to suppress a smirk as he placed me on my feet. "Nothing like a bit of danger to keep someone awake."

I stared at him, fighting the urge to tell him how much of a psychopath he was.

He looked up at the wall. "Not a bad job."

I twisted my head to look at the chocolate-brown coloured wall that I had been painting. "I couldn't reach the top..."

"I can see that." He muttered, then picked up the brush from where I had dropped it when I fell. The wooden floor had a big blob of brown paint on it. "Go and find a cloth from the cupboard in the corner of the kitchen and wipe that up."

I nodded and did as I was told.

When I returned with a cloth, he was painting the top of the wall, where I had been unable to reach. I knelt beside him, and quickly wiped the floor, hoping that it wouldn't stain.

As I clambered to my feet again, the photos caught my eye once more. I put the cloth on the table, then picked up the photos and looked through them once more.

"Who's in these pictures?" I questioned casually.

I heard Eric hurriedly approach me, then the photos were snatched out of my hand. "Get out."

I looked at my now empty hands, then up at Eric, who was ferociously glaring at me. "I.. What?" My voice was barely a whisper.

"Get out!" He raised his voice, and my heart started to thump again, as it did every time he did something that scared me. I quickly nodded and walked towards the door in silence.

I looked back over my shoulder before pulling open the door, to see him hunched over the table, the photographs splayed out in front of him.

It was seconds after I shut the door, that I heard a loud crash on the other side of it, and jumped, my eyes widening. _How had I managed to upset him?_ All I wanted to know was who was in the photographs?

It wasn't until I'd gotten halfway down the stairs that it hit me. I'd actually managed to piss him off and get away with it. He hadn't tried to kill me or something ridiculous like I thought he would.

"What are you doing up here initiate?" A voice pulled me out of my thoughts, and I looked up to see Four stood a few steps down.

"I eh- Eric wanted me to do something as part of my punishment."

Four's eyes narrowed and he slowly nodded. "Get back to the other initiates now, I don't want to find you up here without an official Dauntless member again, okay?"

I nodded and continued walking down the stairs.

"Where is Eric anyway?" Four questioned.

"In his apartment.. he's in a bad mood." I said, then continued on my way before Four could question it anymore.


	8. Chapter 8

"What happened to your arm?" Talulah asked when I arrived at the initiates accommodation. She, Nathan and Freddie stared up at me from where they were sat on her bed.

"Knife training got a bit out of hand." I answered, sitting on my bed beside them.

"What do you mean by 'out of hand'?" She questioned.

I shook my head and sighed. "Don't worry about it Tee." I told her.

She frowned and switched beds to join me on mine. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah." I replied. "Did I miss much?"

"We went to watch Lu get a tattoo, then ended up getting our own." Nathan said, pointing to the part of his arm that was wrapped up.

"Without me?!" I joked. "What did you all get?"

"I got a wolf, it looked pretty awesome." Nathan replied.

"I got some small stars on the back of my shoulder blade. It reminded me of working nights with my Dad." Talulah informed me.

"Very nice." I smiled and looked at Freddie. "What about you?"

"I got my family's initials separated by small dots on the back of my neck."

"Can I see?" I questioned. It sounded interesting.

He nodded and pulled his shirt off, the neck line at the back too high to see. He shifted on the bed so that his back was to me and I quickly stood up and gently peeled back the bandage. As he had explained, there was six small italic letters on the back of his neck.  
_PS • JS • CS_

"It's lovely." I smiled and stuck the bandage back down with the small bit of tape that was on it.

"Thank you." He said, then pulled his shirt back on.

"So other than getting injured, what did you do this afternoon?" Talulah asked.

I hesitated for a second. On my way back from Eric's apartment I had been contemplating telling Talulah everything. I'd hoped that she would've cheered up by the time I got back, and she had, but I was still unsure whether she needed all of this burden on her as well. "About that... I need to talk to you alone..."

She raised an eyebrow, then looked at Freddie and Nathan. "Didn't you two want to get some new boots?"

Nathan slowly nodded. "Trying to get rid of us already, you've only been back five minutes Jac!" he joked.

"Sorry.. I've just got something to discuss with Talulah."

"It's alright." Nathan smiled.

"We'll be back in about twenty minutes!" Freddie said, then I watched as they left the room.

I double checked to make sure that no one else was in the room, before explaining completely everything. What Eric had said on the first day, Four's warning, Rita, the photographs, _everything_.

"And that's why you've been so spacey recently? It wasn't the pills.." Talulah mumbled, then looked up at me. "So Four thinks that Eric killed Rita because he couldn't control her?"

I nodded. "But today... I don't know, it was weird. If that was Rita in those photographs, why would he have kept them? And why would he have reacted the way he did when I saw them?"

"Possessive over them maybe?" She suggested. "Probably kept them to remind himself of his victory."

"Yeah, but there was one of Calvin and the woman... Why would he keep that?" I asked, putting my head in my hands. "This is all so confusing. I wish Four would've just kept his mouth shut!"

"You don't mean that."

"No I don't... I don't know.." I sighed.

"Personally, I think that you're overthinking all of it. Just take Four's warning as a pinch of salt, forget Rita - you didn't know her, you can't be sure about any of that, and just don't let Eric treat you so badly, oh and most of all; don't allow him to keep talking shit about me!"

I smiled. "Okay..."

She smiled back at me and patted my knee. "I'm always here. Don't try to keep anything from me again, okay?"

I nodded. "Okay. I promise I'll tell you everything from now on."

"Good."

"How are you feeling after the rankings?"

"I'm petrified." She told me. "If Aimee does that little bit better than me in our final fights, then I could become factionless..."

I bit down on my bottom lip. "It won't get to that. I promise. I'll help you."

"How?"

"We'll practise. Together. Straight after dinner, okay?"

She nodded. "If it isn't too painful for you..."

I shrugged. "My arm isn't too bad, it just feels funny, and the rest of me hasn't been too bad since I took the painkillers this morning."

"Good."

I tried to think of another way to help her, but that was all I could think of. Unless... "I could ask Four to help us."

"How can he help?"

"I could get him to list me and you to fight. Then I'll make it look like I'll win and you can hit me in a sore spot and take me down."

"Jac, he won't agree with that. It's going completely against what he is supposed to do."

I sighed. "But he might!"

She shook her head. "No. Jac, I'm not going to let you do that. Your score will drop, and Four could get in trouble."

"Fine. I don't want you to go... I don't think I'd want to carry on without you."

"I'll try my best..." She said. "But don't say that! You're a perfect Dauntless, you had a knife thrown at you today and you haven't even freaked out a bit, you belong here!"

"Yeah but you were my first friend here, and you're my best friend-"

"-and it's because I'm your friend that I want you to promise that you won't do anything stupid if I don't make it. Don't follow me to Factionless, and don't do anything ridiculous to end up dead." She cut me off.

I frowned and nodded. "Okay, I promise."

* * *

Talulah and I had found a place to practise alone after dinner, and I'd pushed her to her limit. I'd forced her to hit me as hard as she could, I didn't want her to hold back at all. In fact, I'd oh so easily lied and told her that I'd seduced Nathan in the shower a few days ago and had him before she'd gotten the chance. It was confirmed that she liked him as more than a friend as soon as she punched me in the mouth and it bled like a bitch. We'd continued to fight with as much force possible until I decided that we were done, and admitted to lying just to get her angry.

When we'd arrived back at the accommodation just before midnight, she'd apologised so many times that I thought my ear was going to fall off. Once we were in bed, it was silent for a few minutes before I heard the rustling of sheets, and quiet footsteps.

"Can I get in?" Talulah whispered to me, and I pulled my covers back for her.

"Yeah." I whispered back, and she climbed in.

I shuffled backwards, towards the edge of the bed and tried to find her face through the darkness.

"I really am sorry..." She whispered.

"I know. You've told me too many times already." I replied. "But don't be. You were good, absolutely great at fighting when you were angry."

"But I split your lip..."

"Eric did worse today." I reminded her. "Now, shut up and go to sleep. You'll need your strength tomorrow.. And if you don't fight like you did tonight, then I'm going to kiss Nathan right in front of you."

"You wouldn't..."

"Wouldn't I?" I questioned, and grinned at her.

I felt her body lightly shake with laughter and saw the glint of her teeth as she smiled. "Goodnight Jac."

"Night, Tee."

* * *

A bright light behind my eyelids awoke me, and I carefully opened one eye and blinked a few times as my eyes filled with water. A clanging sound started to fill my ears and I slowly opened my other eye, realising that the clanging was our wake up call.

"Initiates! Get up." Four's voice was heard in between the clanging noises and I frowned and tried to sit up. It startled me when an arm brushed against my back, but then I remembered that it was just Talulah and let out a breath of relief.

I sat myself up carefully, to not elbow the girl laid beside me.

"What's the time?" I heard Aimee question.

"0300 hours." It was Eric that answered.

I snapped my head around to look at where his voice had come from, and found him and Four stood by the door, arms crossed, looking around the room. When his eyes found mine, he stared for a second, his face lacking any form of emotion, then moved up to the girl that had just sat up behind me. I thought I saw the ghost of a frown furrow his eyebrows, but I was probably wrong as it was gone just as soon as it had appeared.

"We're going out." Four stated. "So get up, get ready, and hurry."

Just fifteen minutes later, I found myself leant against the wall of a train car, surrounded by my fellow initiates, the Dauntless-born initiates, and the two instructors.

The Dauntless-born initiates all appeared to be energetic and excited for something, whereas our group looked like they'd been dragged through a hedge backwards. I was certain that if the wind wasn't bellowing into my face, I'd probably have fallen asleep against the wall.

On the way up to the train tracks, Eric and Four had instructed for each of us to grab a gun and a box of paintballs, alerting me to the fact that I'd need to wake up, but that was much easier said than done.

"We'll be dividing into two teams to play capture the flag. Each team will have an even mix of members, Dauntless-born initiates, and transfers. One team will get off first and find a place to hide their flag. Then the second team will get off and do the same." Four called out. "This is a Dauntless tradition, so I suggest you take it seriously."

"Four and I will be your team captains," Eric informed us. He turned to look at Four. "Let's divide up transfers first?"

Four nodded and looked around at all of us. "Feel free to pick first."

"Alright." Eric's eyes darted across all of us, then settled on one person. "James."

"Freddie."

"Talulah."

Four raised an eyebrow at Eric's choice of Talulah, and I frowned. He didn't even like Talulah, Four and I could tell that.

Four didn't question it, just chose his next team member. "Aimee."

"Jac."

I looked up at Eric, the frown still present in my features. There had to be some kind of ulterior motive behind choosing both Talulah and I.

"Nathan."

"That means Eddie's mine." Eric stated, then looked back at Four. "Dauntless-born next, your up."

"Kendall."

I zoned out after this. I didn't need to hear them picking the Dauntless-born's, my concentration was more on why he chose us. I could understand why he possibly picked me, for the same unknown reason as to why he hadn't quit bugging me since I arrived, but Talulah? It was a mystery. I'd never played capture the flag, but I was certain it would involve a lot of skill, and Talulah's handling of a gun wasn't particularly the best. Maybe he was going to try and get rid of her because of what he'd seen this morning, how close we were. Four had mentioned that Eric had turned Rita away from her friends at the start...

_Stop thinking like that, Jac._

I needed to forget Rita, and what Four had told me, and just get on with it.

"You can go first." Eric's voice brought me out of my thoughts, and I looked at the two instructors.

"I'd much rather go second." Four replied, a small smirk appearing on his lips.

"Fine." Eric glared at him. "Your scrawny little team can get off last."

Four nodded once, then looked away from him.

"My team, get ready. We're jumping." Eric announced, then walked towards the door to look out.

I shared a worried look with Freddie, not particularly happy about being on a different team to him and Nathan, but with such a small group it should have been predictable.

"You'll never beat us." Nathan teased.

"Yeah, yeah." I rolled my eyes, then turned to watch as Eric jumped from the car. The Dauntless-born instantly followed, so I grabbed Talulah's hand and pulled her towards the door.

"Together?" She questioned.

"Of course." I smiled at her, then we ran towards the door to gather momentum, and leapt out with our fingers still interlocked.

Neither of us landed on our feet again, and found ourselves sprawled in the grass quietly giggling.

"Hurry up!" Eric called impatiently, and I looked up to see that he had already started walking away.

I pulled a face, then got to my feet and held my hand out to help Talulah up. She took it and once she was up, the  
two of us walked quickly to catch up with Eric and the rest of the group.

As we walked along, I realised that we were near the marsh, and only a mile away from Erudite headquarters. I stared in the direction of the tall bright building that was poking out of the top of my surroundings and suddenly felt a longing for home. I was getting a bit fed up of the dark Dauntless compound, Erudite had theorised a plan to have power all the time using solar energy, and I missed everything being so bright.

I sighed and shook my head. I couldn't miss home, I was part of Dauntless now... I had to be.

"Did you win last year, Eric?" A slim, tall, Dauntless-born girl asked him.

"No." He sneered. "I was on the losing team."

"My brother said that he and Eric were on Harrison's team, they were unlucky last year. Lauren's team won! She had Four on hers." A boy spoke up. I turned to look at him, and he smiled at me, his pale skin strangely bright through the darkness.

"Yeah, Calvin told me that Rita was on the losing team too, they loved to wind each other up about it!" Another boy with long flicky hair added.

I watched as Eric's body tensed up at the mention of Rita. I_ wanted to find out the truth about what happened to her_.

"It's a shame that she's not here anymore... She seemed lovely..." A short Dauntless-born spoke softly.

I watched Eric again. He clenched his fist, and I was certain that if this conversation went on, he might possibly lose his cool.

I exchanged a look with Talulah, then spoke up. "So where are we going to hide our flag?"

"Where did Lauren's team hide theirs last year, Eric?" The boy with flicky hair questioned.

"It defeats the object of the game to tell you." Eric replied, his voice deep. "Plus that would be the first place they'd look."

"Well, what about the Navy Pier?" The slim, tall girl suggested.

"No." Eric rejected the idea.

"What about the fun house?" The short girl asked. "We can hang the flag on the balcony at the top."

I had no idea what the 'fun house' was. I'd never been over here before.

"Good idea." Eric nodded. "Lets go."

He sped up his walk into a jog, and we all copied, following him.

A few moments later, we approached a square building, that had a big face on the roof, with a large white top hat and a scary smile. There was a large sign beneath it, but I couldn't read what it said in the dark.

I followed everyone as they piled in through two doors that were either side of what looked like a booth.

The door that I went through led to a small set of stairs and a narrow hallway, before coming out on an opening with a slight slope. There was a railing on my right, and I turned my head to look just in time to see the pale Dauntless-born helping the short girl over the railing and into a clearing in the middle of the room.

He then looked up at me. "Want a hand over?"

I nodded and walked towards the railing, climbing over it. He placed his hands on my waist and lifted me down, my sides aching a little as he did so.

"Thank you." I smiled at him.

"No problem. I'm Dale."

"Nice to meet you, I'm J-"

"-Jac. I know. The drunk one and the first jumper. You've made an impression on us Dauntless."

My cheeks flushed and I looked down at the floor, embarrassed. "Great..." I mumbled.

He chuckled.

"You need a strategy!" Eric called out, and we turned to look at him.

The group formed again in the centre of the room, and Eric lent against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest. Talulah wandered to my side from where she had entered through the other door.

"Well, someone should stay upstairs with our flag... And keep an eye out for the other team." Dale said.

Eric nodded.

"Maybe two up there, so one can run backwards and forwards with information." Another girl spoke.

"Good idea, Leigh." Eric nodded again. "And what about getting the other team's flag?"

I counted the amount of people in our group as an idea formed in my head.

"We separate." I mumbled, thinking out loud.

"What was that?" Dale questioned from beside me.

I looked up at him and hesitated for a second, before telling him the idea. "Two of us climb up onto the roof, see if we can see the other team's flag. If we can't, then we get down and guard our own. Two out the front, three inside, two upstairs on the balcony, and three hidden in the hallways to scare them."

He slowly nodded. "And if we do see their flag?"

"Two of us with our flag, two inside, two outside, then the rest of us go to find their flag. Two distracting them, two sneaking around them to collect the flag, then Eric can do whatever he chooses."

"That's really good!" The short girl cried, bringing it to my attention that everyone had been listening.

I looked around and most people had a surprised or impressed look on their face, except from James, who was glaring at me, and Eric, who looked like he was going over it in his head.

"That works." Eric spoke after a moment. "We're doing that."

I nodded and let out a relieved breath that I did not know I was holding in.

"Lets get on the roof." Eric said, looking directly at me.

"You want me to get up there?" I questioned, my palms started to feel sweaty.

He nodded. "Your idea. You do it."

I swallowed, but my mouth had started to feel dry.

"Go on.." Talulah softly squeezed my fingertips with her hand, then let go.

I twisted to look at her, and she smiled encouragingly.

"Okay..." I turned back to Eric and slowly nodded. "Lead the way."

"Everyone wait here.. And make sure the flag is out of sight until we shout back down." Eric ordered, then started to walk towards a dark opening in the wall. I followed him, after another encouraging smile from Talulah, and made sure that I stayed a few feet back, enough not to lose him in the 'fun house', but enough to not bump into him.

The dark hallway that we had entered had glow-in-the-dark marks on the walls, something that could possibly have been an actual drawing in the past before wearing off over time. The floor rattled loudly and I wondered if it had moved once upon a time... That's what these kind of things did.. Didn't they?

We reached the end, and turned left, faced with a set of stairs. We had reached the top within a few seconds, seeings as there was only six steps, and turned left again to find a slope like the one I'd come across when I entered the house, however this time there was no rail on my side... Instead I was faced with a black wall. As we walked along, I placed my hand on the wall and allowed it to slide along.. The wall felt thin, and had plenty of dents in it, just small ones, like a scratch from a button on a shirt or something.

An opening became clear ahead of us, and I could just about see the sky over Eric's shoulders. Once he was out in the open, the fresh air hit my face and I closed my eyes for a second, thinking about what we were about to do.

I'd always been hopeless at climbing.. and a little bit scared of heights.

"We're going to have to climb on the railing and up the slope to reach the top." Eric's voice filled my ears, and I opened my eyes, letting them adjust to the darkness.

"What?" I frowned, and watched as he leant over the edge of the railing and looked upwards.

"You heard me. There's no other way up."

My heart started to pound in my chest.

"You can go first. I'll help push you up, then I'll figure out a way to follow."

I slowly walked towards him, and did the same as he had, and looked up at the roof. I felt dizzy just thinking about climbing up there, a tiny slip could result in falling off, and I doubted that could ever end well. Trusting Eric to help me up there was dangerous in itself, nevermind actually getting up there.

"You ready?" He questioned.

I took a deep breath and stood up properly. "Yeah..."

Eric looked down at me, then reached forwards and pulled at the gun that was slung over my shoulder. He lifted it over my head, then placed it down beside me. "Hop up." He gestured to the railing.

I took a quick breath, then sat on the railing, before twisting to place a foot on there too. I looked upwards and grabbed the edge of the roof with one of my hands, pulling myself up and putting my other foot down. My other hand quickly shot up and grabbed the roof too, my heart thumping quicker than I thought was humanely possible.

I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself down, but the longer that I stood there, the more uneasy I felt. I opened my eyes and looked up at my hands, my knuckles had turned white from how tightly I was gripping the roof.

"Jac?"

I barely noticed when Eric said my name, not until he said it the second time.

"Huh?" I mumbled.

"You alright?"

"I uh.. Mhm." I mumbled, looking down at him.

"Found a place to climb up?"

I shook my head, to tell him no and shake any thoughts from my head, then looked either side to see where I would be able to step up. There was no where. "I-I think you're going to have to lift me."

There was no way around it. I'd _have_ to trust him.

"Okay. You just need pushing upwards yeah?"

I looked up, the big head that I'd spotted outside was only about half a metre away, I'd have to grab it and pull myself up. "Yeah."

I heard Eric's footsteps as he came closer, then felt his muscular arms wrap around my legs, just below my knees.

"Step up onto my shoulders." He ordered, and I did as I was told, gaining a good few inches of height, his arms pulling slighty tighter around my legs.

I took a slow deep breath, before looking up at the head. I could just about grab the edge of the creepy smile. "I can just about reach something, but I'll need you to give me one last push."

"Okay." He replied. "On three?"

"Yeah." I stared at the face and tried to concentrate as Eric counted.

"Three!" He said, and pushed me up as high as possible. I let go of the roof with my left hand and reached up to grip a hold of the smile, my right following quickly afterwards. I yanked myself up as hard as I could, my legs pulling out of Eric's reach, dangling as I searched for somewhere to put them.

Eventually, I hooked my feet up onto the top of the smile, and pulled myself the rest of the way so that I was sat on it. It didn't feel entirely sturdy.. so I slowly shuffled across and grabbed the large metal top hat, standing on it. The metal was cold, and the wind blowing made my hands sting.

"Can you see anything?"

I looked down to see Eric stood on the railing, looking up at me expectantly.

"Uh.." I looked up, out into the night. I had been hoping that I'd be able to spot the other team's flag right away, but I could see nothing but darkness, the tops of a few buildings, and the Erudite headquarters in the distance. "No."

He sighed. "Nothing at all?"

"No!" I told him, letting go of the hat for a second to brush my hair out of my face.

"Look again."

I glared at him. "Eric, there's nothing in sight. We're just going to have to protect ours..."

He let out an irritated grunt, then dropped down and disappeared from my sight. I stared out at the night again, wanting it to last a few seconds longer, then looked back at where Eric had once been seen and tried to figure out how I would get back down. _I hadn't really thought this part through._

It was a fairly big drop between the smile and the edge of the roof, and then there was nothing. I'd have to trust Eric to help me again.

"Eric?" I called out, worriedly.

"Yeah?"

"I'm not too sure how to get back down..."

I heard him grumble, then he appeared at the edge again. "Drop down from the smile, and I'll be here to catch you."

"But what if you fall? Or we both fall?"

"Then we're dead." He muttered. "Come on, this is wasting time."

I took a deep breath and pressed my back to the metal hat, then slid down it until I was sat on the smile again. I shuffled back along to the end, then prepared myself for the drop. "I swear to god if you don't catch me and I get out of this alive..."

"Yeah, yeah, your threats don't scare me, initiate."

"That's useful." I muttered under my breath, and closed my eyes for a second, swinging my legs over so that I was hanging onto the smile with my upper body. "You ready?"

"Yes.. Hurry up." Eric grumbled impatiently.

I opened my eyes and looked up at the sky, one last time before taking a deep breath. I was absolutely petrified. _I could die right now_. I shook my head to clear the scary thoughts, then closed my eyes and slowly let go of the smile.

My knees scraped against the roof as I fell, my hands ridiculously searching for something to grab onto. An involuntary scream escaped my lips.. and it felt like I was falling, scraping against the tiles for hours, until suddenly there was a harsh tug on my waist and my body was pressed tightly up against something.

My breath caught in my throat and my eyes slowly fluttered open. My feet found the surface beneath me, and I stood up properly, still being held tightly around my waist. I looked up, short of breath, remembering where I was, and what was happening.

"You good?" Eric questioned. I slowly nodded, then realised that he was holding me tightly against him, and we were still stood on the railing.

"Oh, you caught me." I spoke breathlessly, the relief evident in my voice.

He nodded. "Yeah, I did."

I stared up at him, my heart still pounding, a smile slowly creeping up onto my lips. "Thank you."

He stared back at me, void of any emotion on his face, but quietly spoke back; "No problem."

We stayed like that for a few seconds, before Eric cleared his throat and looked away. "Why did you have to scream?! We've got less time now. They would've heard you."

I swallowed and opened my mouth to apologise, but he released me and lowered himself down onto the balcony before I had the chance to.

He grabbed my waist and pulled me down too, setting me on my feet, then picked up our guns. He pushed mine into my chest, then spoke once more before running into the building. "Let's get some order in this place. We're running out of time."


	9. Chapter 9

"Right, the other team's flag couldn't been seen, so we need to get ready to protect our own." Eric ordered as he entered the centre of the funhouse, with me on his heels. "Little miss loud-mouth over here let out a scream on her way down, the other team would have heard her, so we're definitely short on time. I'm estimating that we'll have about ten minutes."

I bit down on my bottom lip, feeling awkward that he was blaming me for the lack of time.

"Indi and James, I want you upstairs with the flag. James has a good aim, so you'll be able to shoot at the other team before they make it into the house." Eric dictated. The slim Dauntless-born and James ran off in the direction in which Eric and I had just came, the girl grabbing the flag on the way out.

"Dale, Leigh and Ben, find somewhere in the hallways to get them away from the stairs."

The three of them nodded and hopped over the railing on our right.

"Luke and Daisy, I want you out front, in the doorways." Eric told them, and the boy with flicky hair and the short girl nodded and ran off.

I glanced at Talulah. _We were the only ones left_.

"Are we staying in here?" Talulah questioned.

"No." Eric looked down at both of us. "I'm changing the plan a little."

I frowned. "Are you sure?"

He shot me an intimidating glance, then spoke again. "We're going to hide out the front, grab the last member of their team to get them to tell us where the flag is."

I thought about it for a second. That could work... _But what if they don't tell us?_ "What if they don't cooperate?"

"We'll sort that when we come across it." I noticed a glint in Eric's eye as he said this, and I shuddered.

He wasn't just going to shoot them with paintballs.

"Lets go." He ordered, then started to walk towards the door.

Talulah and I followed him, but hung back a few metres.

"Why does he want me with him?" Talulah questioned, her voice only loud enough for me to hear it. "I can understand you, but I'm hopeless..."

I shrugged. "I have no idea. He's scaring me a little."

"Because of what Four told you?"

"Not just that.. It doesn't make sense as to why he wants both of us together. No offence, but the way he acts.. He hates you." I frowned.

She pulled a face. "Thanks for the reminder."

The cool air felt like a slap to the face as we stepped out of the door. It had only been minutes since I had been on the roof, but it felt like it had gotten colder.

"You two, over there." Eric pointed towards two large metal containers. I shared another look with Talulah, then slipped into the gap between the two containers.

"Stand behind me." I told her, and pressed myself against one of the containers so that she could slide past.

"Okay." She squeezed past, then knelt down, holding her gun in position.

I smiled at her, then looked over in Eric's direction. He was stood behind a brick pillar that stood out a few metres from a building.

It was silent for a few minutes and I leant against the container, filling my gun up with the paintballs, feeling bored yet anxious.

And then I heard the footsteps.

They were quiet, fairly far in the distance, so I stood up and grabbed a hold of my gun properly. I got into position and listened as the footsteps came closer.

I guessed that there was about four of them so far, but I expected others not far behind.

"Will you quit stomping?" I heard a girls voice, then a grunt from a boy.

"I'm not stomping, you just have ridiculous hearing." Came the snappy reply.

"Shh... Did you hear that?" It was Freddie's voice.

The footsteps stopped.

"Look, there's the flag!" It was the girl's voice.

"Shut up will you?!" Another snappy reply.

"They must be nearby, we'll have to sneak up quietly." It was Nathan.

_Too late._ I thought, as I watched Eric lean around the corner, aiming his gun in their direction. I cherised the last few seconds of silence, before the loud sound of paintballs flying from the gun echoed around the atmosphere.

"Shit!" I heard a male voice call out, then more sounds of paintball guns going off filled my ears.

I leant forwards to see where the other team were, before aiming and shooting in their direction. Talulah did the same from where she was knelt. The other team were slowly getting closer, inch by inch, until they came close enough to see us. I stopped shooting and grabbed Talulah, dragging her back away from them, where we ran around the back of the container and stopped at the side. I could see the back of the other team as they shot at Luke and Daisy, then Eric caught my eye. He signalled to Nathan.

I sighed. _Of course, he wanted us to grab one of the people we were closest to_. I glanced to my right, to check that none of the other team were coming from their camp, then looked at Talulah.

"On the count of three, shadow me. Keep me covered, I'm going to grab Nathan."

"Nathan?!" Her eyes widened.

"Yes, Nathan!" I cried. "Lets go!"

She nodded, then gripped her gun tighter.

"One.. Two.. Three!" I called out, and we ran towards the other group.

I wrapped an arm around Nathan's next and yanked him backwards, my hand coming up to cover his mouth.

"Shut up, it's me!" I whispered into his ear, then dragged him backwards towards the containers.

When we were out of the other team's sight, I pushed Nathan to the floor and kneeled beside him, pushing my hand over his mouth again.

"If I let go... will you promise to keep quiet?" I asked.

He nodded, and I slowly pulled my hand away.

"Where's the flag?" Eric quizzed, causing me to jump. I hadn't realised that he'd joined us.

"I'm not going to tell you that..." Nathan answered, looking up at all three of us.

Talulah sighed and reached out to pat down a piece of hair on Nathan's head. "Please Nath?"

"No." He said, frowning.

I heard Eric shift beside me, and looked up to his gun pointing at Nathan. "Tell me, or I'll shoot you."

"It's just paint." Nathan said, and I almost slapped him for talking back to Eric.

"Do you want a paintball embedded into your eyeball?" I questioned through gritted teeth. "Because he'll do it."

Nathan shook his head.

I gestured to my arm. "He threw a knife at me, that's far more dangerous. He won't hesitate to shoot you, Nathan!" I spat.

"I'm sorry, Jac. I'm not letting you guys win."

I didn't want Eric to shoot Nathan with the paintball gun. I'd seen first hand how painful it was to be hit by one when it was that close to you.

I stood up and watched as Eric closed one eye and prepared to shoot.

"Last chance, initiate."

Nathan shook his head once more and stared at Eric.

It was then that an idea hit me.

I quickly grabbed my gun and wrapped an arm around Talulah, pulling her into me. Her back was pressed into my front, and I held her tightly, before lifting the gun up to her face. She gasped.

"I'm sorry Tee..." I whispered before looking at Nathan. "You don't care about yourself, so let's see if you care if Talulah gets it instead."

"You wouldn't do that... she's on your team."

"Oh yeah? Do you want to try me?" I questioned, glaring at him.

He frowned and stared up at Talulah, the worry evident on his face.

"Where's the flag?" Eric asked, his voice menacing.

"B-behind the dodgems." Nathan mumbled.

I let out a relieved sigh and dropped my gun, pushing it to my side.

"Thank you, Nathan." Talulah breathed, and I grabbed her hand.

"Come on." Eric called and started to run, his gun still prepared in his hands.

I pulled Talulah along as I followed him, until she was quick enough to run beside me.

"Were you really going to shoot me in the face?" She asked.

"Of course I wasn't, I just knew he'd fall for it, and I didn't want Eric to shoot him." I looked over my shoulder, and saw Luke sat on top of the Dauntless-born boy, and Daisy was still shooting at Freddie and the girl.

She smiled. "You're clever."

"I still don't understand why you tell me that." I grumbled.

"Shh." Eric hushed us, slowing his run to a stop behind a wall. I stopped just behind him, and Talulah just behind me. "It's the other side of this clearing."

I watched as he poked his head around the corner, then quickly pulled back.

"Four's there. With two others."

"Which means there's three with the flag?" Talulah spoke, and I was unsure whether she was questioning her maths or their logic.

"Yeah." Eric nodded. "Plan?"

"You make one up." I grumbled.

"Do you want to win?" Eric glared at me.

"Yeah.."

"Then get thinking, Erudite."

I narrowed my eyes at him, pissed that he was being such an ass all of a sudden.

"One of us goes straight through the clearing." Talulah spoke up. "One hangs back, another runs straight for the flag."

I thought about it for a second. "That could work.. But we'll all have to have each other's back."

Eric rolled his eyes. "Fine. Jac you're running straight for the flag."

"Why not Talulah?" I questioned. "I'm a better aim than her, she might possibly get round unnoticed."

"I said you, therefore _you_ are going." Eric spat, glaring down at me again.

"Will you two stop?" Talulah ordered. "We're running out of time!"

I sighed and nodded. "Sorry.. carry on."

"Talulah, back me up." Eric demanded, getting a nod in return. "Once I'm out there, wait a second before following me. Then do whatever you can to not get caught, Jac."

"Okay.." I nodded.

Eric gave us one departing look, before running out into the clearing. The sound of the paintball guns filled my ears again.

Talulah and I were silent for a second, then I spoke. "Ignore what Eric said. You're going for the flag. I'll cover you."

"What?" Her eyes widened. "Are you crazy?"

"Clearly." I mumbled. "You're obviously going to need the success more than I am, and I don't care what Eric wants. So you're getting that flag and that's that. Stay behind me until you can get around."

I gripped my gun and held it out in front of me, before running out into the clearing. Eric was still being shot at by Four, however he had grabbed a Dauntless-born initiate and was using him as a shield. My heart sank when I looked up and realised that Aimee was there, ready to shoot at me.

I lifted my gun and aimed at her, pulling down on the trigger as quick as possible. I almost grinned when the paintballs splatted all over her, and she winced. It wasn't until she started firing back, that I fully understood why she was wincing. A few paintballs flew towards me, and burst directly on my sore arm. I let out a hiss of pain and dived out of the way, biting down on my bottom lip to stop myself from crying out as another paintball hit my arm. _If she carried on, I was going to aim for her bloody nose! _

I glanced over my shoulder to see that Talulah had managed to slip by unnoticed, and turned around to be met in the face with a paintball. The splat of it hitting my skin was painful, and I lost my last nerve.

I pretended to lose my footing and fell onto the floor. Instead of getting up, I laid there, waiting. Aimee's footsteps were heard as she ran towards me, and I grinned to myself.

She paused at my side, her gun pointed right at me. "This is a nice payback." She sneered.

"Oh yeah?" I snapped, then shoved my gun into the back of her knees, so that she fell across me. I pulled my legs out from underneath her, then quickly sat on her back, pressing my gun to her head. "What was that about payback?"

Suddenly, I heard a loud cheer and Talulah's excited voice. "I got the flag!" She cried.

I looked over my shoulder to see her holding the flag up, running back into the clearing with two Dauntless-born initiates running alongside her.

"Yes!" I cried, and hopped to my feet, running in her direction. "I knew you could do it!"

A loud whistle sounded, and I looked over to see that Four had blown it. He was watching us glumly, an irritated expression on his facial features, whereas Eric was stood beside him with a smirk on his lips.

I grinned and turned back to Talulah. _They had to have been scoring us on this.. It would have improved hers by so much!_

She smiled at me, and I looked down at my paint covered shirt, before scraping some of it off and wiping it on her cheek.

She giggled and shoved me in the ribs, then looked up as the rest of the two teams ran around the corner, our team cheering as they spotted the flag.

* * *

Once we'd arrived back at the compound it was fast approaching six am. We'd been given until eleven to shower and catch up on sleep, then they expected us in the Pit for our final fights.

I'd been against Eddie, and I'd conceded fairly quickly. It was clear that the poor boy wasn't made for Dauntless, and I'd felt awful that I couldn't help him... but it would have been obvious that I'd not tried my hardest.

The final stage one rankings were revealed at half past five, just before dinner.

Talulah held mine and Nathan's hands as we entered the Pit again, dreading seeing the scores.

"Your first stage of initiation is now complete. These final rankings will determine whether you make it to the next stage." Eric announced.

I noticed that it wasn't only Eric and Four here. Max - one of the Dauntless Leader's was stood beside Eric, and Lauren and Isla had brought the other initiates too.

"Here goes..." I mumbled as Four and Lauren turned around two boards, my heart thumping away.

I read the board in Four's hands, the Dauntless-born's rankings not bothering me right now.

1. Freddie.

2. James.

3. _Jac_.

I was still third, having not improved over the last few days, but I was still in! I'd passed.

4. Talulah.

5. Nathan.

6. Aimee.

7. Eddie.

I almost let out a loud squeal when I saw that Talulah was just one place beneath me, and Aimee and Eddie's names were in red.

It was sad that they were being made Factionless, but my best friend was staying.. And so was Nathan and Freddie, and that's all that I cared about at this particular moment.

I felt Talulah's hand slip out of mine and twisted to look, ready to congratulate her, to find that she was already doing a celebration of her own.

My jaw dropped as she pushed her lips to Nathan's, and he oh so willingly kissed her back. _I should've expected it. _

"Well that was a long time coming." Freddie spoke into my ear, and I span around to look at him.

"We passed!" I cried, and threw myself into him, giving him the tightest hug that I could muster.

He chuckled and hugged me back, then looked down at me. "Congratulations, small person."

I giggled. "You too, big guy!"

* * *

The Dauntless celebrations were in full swing that night. We'd been reminded that visiting day was tomorrow, then informed that we had the day after that off.

Lu had congratulated all four of us with big hugs and a huge grin in the dining hall, before we all sat down and tucked into our food.

Max had made an announcement to the entire faction that we were through the first stage of initiation, and that was when the party ideas were flung about. Lu demanded that we all had a few celebratory drinks tonight with her and a few of her friends, but I instantly refused. Eventually, she'd talked me into joining them, but staying away from the drink.

By half-past nine, we found ourselves sat on a platform in the Pit, surrounded by Lu and many other Dauntless members. The Pit was completely rammed, the sound of drums and singing filling the air. I doubted that there was a Dauntless who wasn't enjoying themselves tonight.

Lu plopped herself down on my lap and grinned at me. "One drink?"

I shook my head. "No!" I cried, smiling at her.

"Don't be a grump, I promise I won't let you drink as much this time..." She held her bottle to my lips.

I tilted my head back and pushed the bottle away. "No thanks, you drink it!"

She shrugged and took a mouthful, then scrambled to her feet. "Your loss darling."

"I'm sure I'll live." I smiled again, and watched as she tottered off into the crowd.

As happy as I was to have passed, I couldn't help but feel guilty that Aimee and Eddie were out. No one else acted like they'd noticed.

I looked up at Nathan and Talulah, who were dancing, bodies pressed together, smiling happily. They didn't have a care in the world, and they certainly weren't worrying about those that were made Factionless.

I turned my head to see Freddie, sat with Dale and Daisy, a bottle in his hand, chuckling away. He wasn't worried either.

_Was it silly for me to worry so much?_ I sighed and got to my feet, deciding to go for a walk. I slid past a few people, then stepped down from the platform and pushed my way through the crowds. As I got closer and closer to the exit of the Pit, the music and noise was becoming fainter, and for some reason I relaxed a little.

I wandered around for a little while, before finding myself stood at the railings on top of The Chasm.

In the mayhem of the day, I'd almost forgotten the things that had bothered me the most over the last few days.

I had so many unanswered questions running through my head. For a start, what was Eric's motive for picking both Talulah and I this morning? And loads of other things, like Rita. She was bugging me the most.

I stared down into the Chasm and wondered how on earth she ended up in there... I wasn't sure whether I believed that it was an accident or not.

"You're not going to jump are you?"

Eric's voice startled me, and I snapped my head around to look at him.

"It's not on my list of daredevil stunts right now." I replied, my heart trying to recover from the scare.

"Well, try and keep it off. We've had enough trouble with people jumping off of this thing already." He spoke, slowly approaching me, a bottle of alcohol in his hand.

"Noted." I nodded my head at him, then turned back to the Chasm.

"Congratulations by the way. Third... Not bad." He leant against the railing next to me.

"Thanks, I guess." I shrugged.

"You don't seem too happy."

"That's because everyone's celebrating when people have just been made Factionless."

"Would you rather it was you?"

His question caught me off guard.

"Well.. no.."

"Well then. Shut up and get on with it. You're lucky to be here."

I slowly nodded and pursed my lips together.

He took a swig from the bottle, then looked down at me. "By the way, nice little stunt you did today with your little friend. I just adore it when you don't follow my orders." He muttered.

I rolled my eyes. "I figured you'd be scoring us on it, and she needed the points more than I did."

"Right." He grumbled, taking another swig out of the bottle, before holding it out to me.

"After last time? You must be kidding me. I don't want to end up with another one of your ridiculous punishments."

"Ridiculous?"

"Yes, ridiculous." I muttered. "Painting your apartment for you, then being kicked out for looking at some photos."

I noticed him tense up beside me. "They were private. You had no right to look at those."

"Well then you shouldn't have left them lying around." I told him. "I didn't realise you were a transfer... Erudite too?"

He shrugged. "I'm Dauntless now. That's all that matters."

"I suppose so... but I know your Mom, well I'm assuming she's your Mom.."

"Karen Mathewson? Yeah, she was my Mother."

I slowly nodded again. "She worked with my Father."

"Right. Look, I'd appreciate it if you didn't mention the transfer thing to any other initiates."

"Okay." I shrugged. "I'll keep it between us."

He nodded. "Thanks."

"... As long as you tell me something?"

He frowned. "What?"

I bit down on my bottom lip, before asking; "Who was the other girl in the photographs."

He sighed, and his jaw went rigid. "Her name was Rita." He answered, then turned and walked away without another word.


	10. Chapter 10

_"Jac..." The sound of a female's voice awoke me from my slumber. I frowned and slowly sat up, but no one was in sight. _

_"Jac..." The voice came from near the door, and I didn't recognise it. Who was calling me? _

_I threw my sheets back, and climbed out of bed, tip-toeing on the freezing cold floor. As I got to the door, I spotted a flash of red hair. _

_I stepped outside and couldn't see a thing, so wandered down the hallway on my left to try and find the girl. _

_At first I thought that it could have been Isla trying to show me something, but I knew her voice and it wasn't her. _

_"Hurry, Jac!" The voice called again, and I looked up towards the end of the hallway to see nothing. _

_I frowned and walked a little faster, wondering what on earth was going on. _

_The voice led me down a few more hallways, until I finally came to a stop at the Chasm. _

_"Finally." The voice was calm, almost relieved and I turned my head to the right to finally see the girl. She had her back to me but I could see that she was slim, slightly taller than me, dressed in a tight black dress. Her wavy red hair flowed down her back, until it stopped just before her backside. _

_"Who are you?" I questioned._

_She glanced over her shoulder at me, and I gasped. _

_"You know who I am." She smiled. _

_"R-rita?" I choked out. "But you're dead?!"_

_She turned around so that she was facing me, and put her finger over her lips as if to tell me to be quiet. "We don't have much time." _

_Why?! Why don't we have much time?!_

_She dropped her hand to her side. "I just wanted to tell you not to be scared. No one will hurt you."_

_I frowned. I was so confused. "I don't understand. Why are you telling me this?! How are you even here?!" _

_She shook her head. "Jacquetta, stop asking questions. That's not why I'm here."_

_"Then why are you here?!" I cried. _

_"Because I'm here to help you understand. You're not in any danger, and no one will hurt you. You need to stay calm, think carefully - but not in too much depth, and most of all, enjoy yourself."_

_"You're not making sense! How can you help me understand if you're not making any sense at all?!"_

_She sighed. "I'm sorry. I've got to go."_

_"What?! No!" _

_"I'm sorry." She apologised again and walked over to the railings. She stepped up onto them, then stretched her arms out. _

_"Rita!" I cried. What was she doing?! _

_"Goodbye Jacquetta."_

_Before I could even blink, she'd thrown herself off of the edge of the Chasm. A loud cry erupted from within me, as I ran towards the railing in a hope that I would catch her. But it was too late._

"Jac. Jac! It's okay! Shh..."

My eyes burst open and I attempted to sit up, gasping for air.

"Hey, hey!" It was Talulah.

I stared up at her, catching my breath. My eyes felt sticky, and my palms and face felt clammy.

"You were having a nightmare.." She said, pushing my hair out of my face.

I frowned. I hadn't had a nightmare in years, but it hadn't been scary. It was a warning from Rita. It had felt so _real_.

"Are you okay? You look pretty shaken up.. do you want to talk about it?"

I shook my head, feeling like I was in a daze. "I'm fine. It was nothing." I wiped my clammy hands on the sheets, then took a deep breath.

"It didn't look like nothing..."

It didn't feel like it either. It was strange. All of this shit was on my mind far too often.

"Just leave it, Tee." I stared at the floor a second, then noticed that everyone else in the room was watching us. "Was I screaming?"

She nodded. "We were all getting up, Four woke us up about twenty minutes ago. I was going to leave you to sleep... But you started to scream out, and thrash around. So I quickly came over to help you."

I put my head in my hands and lent against my knees. "Urgh." I grumbled. "Did I say anything?"

"No, you just screamed."

I looked up at her and slowly nodded, then pushed my sheets back. "Right, well I'd better start getting ready."

"Yeah..." She stood up and flicked her long hair over her shoulder. "Families will be arriving at ten."

_My heart sank. It was visiting day. _

"Alright.. Okay." I faked a smile, then shuffled to the edge of the bed.

Would my parents come and see me today? I hadn't done want they'd wanted me to, but I hoped that they'd forgiven me. I missed them so much, I needed to see them again, probably for my sanity more than anything else like sentiment.

"What are you going to wear?" Talulah asked.

I only had the clothes they'd given us when we'd started, and the jumpsuit that I'd worn last night. Both of which would clearly show off my injuries, something that my Mother would freak out about. "I have no idea.. I guess I'll just put on my jumpsuit again."

"Again?" Talulah questioned. "You've not been to buy anything else have you?"

I shook my head and stood up.

She sighed. "What are you like?"

I shrugged.

"Sorry to butt in, but here." Freddie threw a black cotton shirt at me.

"What's this?" I questioned as I caught it.

"It's one of my long sleeved t-shirts. I saw a girl wearing one like a dress with boots the other day. I thought was an odd combination but it looked alright." He informed me.

I unfolded the shirt and held it up against me. It was pretty big.. It might work.

"I've got some tights you can borrow if you need them.." Talulah added, obviously concerned about the length.

I smiled at them both. "I really don't know what I'd do without you two... Thank you so much!"

* * *

"Don't get too cosy today, initiates. It's still Faction before blood that matters." Eric ordered as he walked us towards the Pit, where our families would be waiting for us.

I'd put on the shirt and it had fit just right, baggy - as expected, but long enough to cover what it needed to. If it hadn't have been for the huge black bruises covering my legs, I wouldn't have needed to wear the tights, but they were a good addition to the outfit anyway. I'd braided my hair, around the back of my head and down over my shoulder so that it came down in front of me. There wasn't much that I could do to cover the bruises on my cheeks, but Talulah's make up had covered them a little and they didn't look so dark.

"They won't be there to help you with your training, and they sure as hell won't be here if you pass, so don't get too attached because it might be the last time that you'll get to see them." Eric continued.

I swallowed a lump in my throat, my nerves getting the best of me. _What if they weren't there? _

We entered the Pit, and straight away the Dauntless-born initiates ran away from Lauren and over to their parents.

A Candor couple waved in our direction, and James pushed past me, hurriedly making his way over to them. I watched as he embraced the woman I assumed to be his Mother, and her eyes filled up with tears.

"There's my sister!" Talulah cried, and I turned to look as she ran over to a heavily pregnant Amity woman.

"I didn't realise that she had a sister..." I mumbled.

"Yeah, she has three.." Nathan told me, looking around the room. "And my parents are right behind her! See you later Jac!"

I watched as he wandered off after Talulah.

"Is that your parents?" Freddie put his hand on my shoulder and twisted me to look in another direction. Four people dressed in blue caught my eye. Two of them I didn't know and I assumed that they were Freddie's parents, but the other two made a huge grin spread across my face.

Stood there with her blonde hair in a tight high bun, was my Mom, with her arm around the waist of the tall, bald man I recognised as my Dad. They waved at me, and Freddie pushed me forwards a little to get me to move.

As we walked along, his hand still on my shoulder, the four Erudite's smiled brightly at us.

"Good luck." Freddie said, before letting go and pulling his Mother into a hug.

I smiled at him, then turned to look at my parents as they held their arms out to me. I almost dived into them, enveloping them into the biggest hug I could muster.

"Oh my baby girl!" Mom cried. She pulled away from me, and held me at arms length. "Look at you!"

I smiled. "I know, I'm a bit bruised..."

"Yes, but you look wonderful!"

I raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"You've got a glow to you, one that you never had in Erudite."

She must have been lying, I felt rough.

Dad took his glasses off and fiddled with them, before tucking them into his pocket. "I must say I agree. You look like you've been beaten to a pulp, but you also look determined."

Mom squeezed my upper arms and I winced, quickly pushing her hand away from my injury.

"What was that? Are you alright?" She fussed, noticing my wince and obviously feeling the bandage.

"It's nothing. Don't worry." I told her. I was unsure whether she knew what Dauntless training ensued, but I don't think she'd be impressed with the fact that I had a knife thrown at me.

"It's not just nothing.." She tugged at my sleeve and pulled it up, to reveal the bandage. "What's under there?"

"I cut myself.. stop worrying about me Mom."

She sighed. "I can't help it, especially with you being here."

"How did you cut yourself up there?" Dad questioned, one eyebrow raised.

I rolled my eyes. "My instructor threw a knife at me, no big deal. It's not too bad here."

My Mom looked like she was about to pass out. "He threw a knife at you?!"

"It's just a bit of tough love, it's nothing out of the ordinary." I lied. Eric hadn't thrown a knife at anyone else.

"I want to meet this guy." Dad stated.

I rolled my eyes. "I thought you were here to see me, not yell at Eric for doing his job."

"You're right. We're sorry." Mom apologised and pulled my sleeve back down. "Are you doing well?"

I nodded. "I ranked third in the first stage of training."

"That's great!" Dad cried, patting my shoulder softly.

"Thank you." I smiled.

"Jac..." Freddie called from his position just a metre or two away.

My parents and I twisted to look at him.

"Yeah?" I smiled at him.

"I'm about to give my parents a tour. I was wondering if you'd like to join us?"

I looked at my parents, and they both nodded.

"Sure."

"Great." He gestured to the couple beside him. "This is Peter and Julie Smith, my parents." The PS and JS that had been tattooed on his back.

"Lovely to meet you." I shook both of their hands. "I'm Jac. These are my parents Sandra and Ian Caliente."

My parents shook Freddie's hand, then smiled at Peter and Julie.

"Didn't I meet you in the lab a few months ago Peter?" My Dad questioned.

"Why yes, you did!" Peter answered and the two of them started a conversation about some kind of research that they had been doing.

Freddie led the group away, standing up the front with his Mother. Dad and Peter continued their conversation as we walked, and Mom hung back with me.

"So, Freddie... Are you guys close?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Mom, the first guy we come across and you're asking if I like-like him?!" I cried in mock horror.

She giggled. "You're a young woman now, plus he's cute and comes from an intelligent family."

I shook my head. "He might be, but I'm not interested. We're just friends."

She nodded. "Well, alright."

* * *

After the tour, Freddie and I took our parents to get something to eat. Freddie spoke constantly about how good the Dauntless cake was, and how they all needed to try it.

It wasn't until we were eating that I noticed Mom and Dad giving each other strange looks. I raised an eyebrow but didn't question it... I wasn't sure I wanted to know in front of everyone in the dining hall, least of all, Freddie.

"What's the time Pete?" Julie asked her husband, and he checked his watch.

"Half-past one..." He sighed.

"I've got a meeting in half an hour..." She said, then looked up at Freddie. "I'm sorry love, we're going to have to go.."

"Already?" Freddie sighed. "Can I quickly show you something before you go?"

"Of course." Julie smiled.

Freddie span around on his chair so that his back was to his parents. He tugged on the back of his shirt, and pulled it down just enough to see his tattoo.

His Father gasped and reached out to touch it. "Our initials.."

"Oh Freddie.." Julie breathed, and tears filled her eyes. "It's beautiful."

"You don't have any surprise tattoos, do you?" Dad quizzed, looking down at me.

I shook my head. "Not yet. I want to think of a good one, one that means something."

Mom smiled. "That's a good idea, sweetie."

"No.. don't mark your body! You don't need tattoos."

"Dad, it's a Dauntless tradition to have tattoos. Anyway, it's my body... I can do what I like."

He frowned and opened his mouth to speak, but stopped when Freddie and his parents got to their feet.

"It was good to see you again, Ian." Peter said, shaking Dad's hand.

"Lovely to meet you, Jac, Sandra." Julie shook our hands, then prepared herself to leave.

"You too." I smiled.

"Best of luck, dear." Peter smiled at me.

"Thank you."

Freddie gave my shoulder a small squeeze. "See you later Jac." He said, then left with his parents.

I watched them go, then picked up an apple slice and popped it into my mouth.

Dad stared at Mom for a second and it was like they were having a silent conversation. I left them to it for a bit, looking around the room, before Dad caught my attention by clearing his throat.

"Jacquetta..."

"Dad..." I looked at him.

"Your Mother and I have something to tell you."

I nodded. "I thought as much. Go on..."

"Well..." He paused for a second, looking like he was trying to find the words to say.

Mom placed her hand on top of mine, and I twisted to look at her.

"You know that we love you so much, don't you?"

I nodded again. "Yeah.. I love you too.."

_She was making me feel anxious_.

"And we are so proud of you. You will always be our number one girl."

I glanced at Dad, then back at her. "Can you just tell me? You're freaking me out."

Mom stuttered for a second, then spoke again. "We were unsure at first, because of your age... I mean, you could give us a grandchild at any moment..."

I raised an eyebrow. _Why would that even cross her mind? _

"So it would be rather unusual for this to happen, but your Father and I found out, on Tuesday.. was it Tuesday?" She looked at Dad.

"Yes, Tuesday."

"Tuesday, that we're expecting another child."

_Oh. Oh..._

I felt my jaw slowly drop open, and I stared at my Mom for a second.

_She was having another baby?! What the hell?!_

"As I said, at first we were unsure because of your age... but we really can't give it up. It's a baby..." She continued. "Our little baby."

I snapped my mouth shut, aware that I probably looked ridiculous.

They both looked at me expectantly.

"Say something... please?" Mom said quietly.

I didn't know what to say. "Uh, congratulations?" I sounded confused, maybe a little sarcastic.

Mom frowned. "You think it's a bad idea, don't you?" She sighed and turned to look at Dad. "I told you she wouldn't like it!"

"Don't be silly, Sandra. She's just a little shocked. Aren't you, Jacquetta?"

They both looked at me and I stared back at them.

They were going to have a baby... My baby brother or sister. And they waited until I'd left home?! I'd probably never even get to meet it!

"All those years that I begged for a brother or sister, and you decide to have one _now_?" I grumbled, then cheekily grinned at them.

Mom let out a breath of relief and Dad chuckled.

"Oh thank god, I thought you were going to be mad at us..." Mom said, smiling.

"Don't you worry about that." I told her. "You can't dwell on me, I don't even live with you guys anymore."

"Maybe not, but it's still going to be your sibling." Dad stated.

"It'll be gorgeous, just like her." Mom said, planting a big kiss on my forehead.

I smiled again and gently pushed her away. "Oh stop!"

She laughed.

"And you don't need to worry about grandchildren." I told her. "They won't be created for at least another ten years... or maybe never."

Dad chuckled. "I do hope so. No man is allowed to touch my little princess like that..."

"Okay, lets not go there!" I cut him off, my eyes widening a little.

Mom laughed again, and finished her drink. "Because you won't be there for the birth, we were wondering if you wanted to give us a few name ideas now?"

I thought about it for a second. "What about Ian junior? Or spell it another way, like I-A-I-N or something?"

Dad grinned. "I like that."

"What about a girl?"

I thought again, and for some reason, only one name came into my head. Her story was intriguing, it had taken over my mind. "Rita."

"Rita? That's a lovely name." Mom gasped.

I nodded. "It is..."

For some reason, I imagined the Rita from the photographs and my dream, handing a child over to my parents. It was stupid, and I had a crazy imagination to think of something like that, but it made me smile. This was really grating on my mind.

* * *

After all of the parents left, everyone regrouped in the Pit, spirits high. The Dauntless leaders, including Eric, were there, making sure that everyone left without any complications.. and I figured that they were keeping an eye on us too, checking to make sure no one had gotten too emotionally attached.

"How was your sister?" I asked Talulah.

"Oh she was great! Her baby is due next week, she let me feel the kicking!" She grinned. "And I introduced her to Nathan and his parents. Everyone got on well!"

I smiled. "Oh, that's so great!"

Talulah nodded. "What about you? How were your folks?"

"Good." I smiled again. "They're having another baby!"

"No way! How exciting! You're going to have a baby brother or sister!"

"I know!"

"So that's why your parents kept looking at each other funny..." Freddie joined in our conversation.

"Yeah, they were having a like silent conversation, they were scared to tell me."

"Why?"

I tried not to laugh. "Basically, they were worried that they were going to have grandchildren the same age as one of their children."

Talulah's mouth dropped open, and Freddie chuckled.

"No way! You're only sixteen!" Talulah cried.

Freddie poked my stomach a few times. "Can you actually even imagine a baby in there?"

I swatted his hand away and lightly laughed.

"You've not gone and made a reputation for yourself have you initiate?" Eric's voice came from behind me, and I looked back to see him stood just behind me, apparently having listened to the last part of the conversation.

I rolled my eyes. "No. But I'm sure you'd have enjoyed it if I had."

He smirked. "I'd appreciate it if no more Caliente's were created any time soon."

"Too bad, my Mom's already expecting one."

He shrugged. "Good for her. I just wanted to make sure that there would be no miniature Jacquetta's running around. That would be my worst nightmare."

I narrowed my eyes. "Careful Eric, I might just make your nightmare come true." I threatened.

He scoffed. "You're too innocent for all that anyway, I don't know why I bothered to mention it now."

"If that's what you'd like to believe." I replied, then turned back to look at Talulah and Freddie, who were watching with slightly awed, yet amused, looks on their faces.

"Do you want to go back to the room?" Talulah asked quietly.

I shrugged. "Sure... I want to loosen my hair anyway."

She smiled and we turned to walk back towards the accommodation.

Eric stared as we walked in his direction, then Talulah and Freddie swerved around him.

I paused next to him.

"I'd much rather there be more Caliente's being born than Mathewson's. The poor little Mathewson's might turn out like you... now wouldn't that be a disaster?" I muttered, shooting him a filthy look, before catching up with the other two.

I wasn't sure where the confidence to say that had stemmed from, but it sure as hell felt good.


	11. Chapter 11

The rest of our time off of training passed quickly, and we'd all had a good time. None of us had a clue what stage two entailed, other than the fact that it was mental.

The anxiety of our group was incredibly clear as we sat opposite the Dauntless-born initiates in a dark hallway, wondering what was going on behind the closed door at the end.

One of the Dauntless-born initiates, Martin, had gone in first and never returned, even when Four called in the next person. I figured that there was a back door, but it made me feel even more anxious. If they had a back door, then clearly they didn't want people to see the other initiates after they'd done whatever it was that they were doing.

"So.. which one of you ranked first?" Leigh questioned. I looked up to see her slim figure perched on the edge of her chair, sat up straight, legs crossed.

"I did." Freddie answered, smiling at her softly. I could tell he was nervous.

"Not bad. You were an Erudite weren't you?"

"Yeah." He nodded. "Who was first in your group?"

"Dale." Leigh gestured to the pale boy sat on her right.

Dale looked up and nodded. "I trained for most of my life, so yeah."

It was quiet for a moment, then I spoke.

"Do you know what they're doing in there? Did you get to prepare for this stage too?"

Dale shook his head. "No one knows what this stage is. It's purely mental, so I don't think there would have been much that we could have done to prepare for it."

I frowned and it caught my attention that Freddie was now bouncing his leg up and down, and biting his thumb nail. _He was more nervous than I was. _

The door opened again, and Four appeared once more. "James."

James slowly got to his feet, and followed Four into the room, the door shutting behind him.

I tapped my foot and stared at the ceiling, wondering how long it'd be until it was my turn.

A good few minutes passed and I sighed, before asking what the time was.

"11.20." Dale answered, after checking his watch.

I thanked him and nodded, then stared up at the ceiling again. If it took so long, why did they make us sit outside for so long? Couldn't they send us in pairs or something?

Some time later, the door finally opened again and Four called out for the next person. "Nathan."

I sighed and watched as they disappeared, then asked for the time again.

"11.43." Dale read from his watch again.

James had been in there for almost twenty-five minutes. _Why?_

I sighed again and closed my eyes, allowing my mind to drift from the current situation...

I'd tried not to fuss about Rita much since I'd had that dream. Of course I still had plenty of questions about her, and everything Four had told me, but I knew I wouldn't get anywhere with it... and it wasn't worth worrying over. The dream had been my body's way of telling me that I think far too much.

"Jac."

The sound of my name tore me out of my thoughts, and I opened my eyes to see Four stood at the door, waiting for me.

That had been quick... I wondered why Nathan's had taken less time than everyone else's.

I rose to my feet and walked towards the door nervously. Four nodded at me encouragingly, then stepped out of the way for me.

I walked past him and into the room, then paused as the door shut behind me. Sat in the centre of the room was a reclining metal chair, similar to the one that had been in the aptitude test. I shuddered, remembering how weird I'd found that experience. Beside the chair was a familiar machine and it all looked fairly similar, but unlike the room from the tests, this room had no mirrors and barely any light. There was a computer screen on a desk in the corner.

"Sit." Four ordered, nudging me forwards a little.

"Is it a simulation? Like the aptitude tests?" I questioned, nervously walking over to the chair.

"Ever heard the phrase 'face your fears'?" He asked, and I nodded. "We're taking that literally. The simulation will teach you to control your emotions in the midst of a frightening situation."

I frowned and slowly took a seat, sitting back slowly, the chair feeling cold.

"So, do we drink the serum again?"

He shook his head and reached his hand out towards me. He quickly tucked my hair behind my ear and pushed the bottom of it over my shoulder, exposing my neck.

He tapped something, and I twisted my head back to see what it was. He had a syringe with a long needle in one hand, his thumb against the plunger. The sight of this caused my heart to pound, and I slowly start to lean away from him.

"That is huge..." I breathed, feeling my hands becoming clammy.

"We use a more advanced version of the simulation here. It's a different serum, no wires or electrodes for you." He said, looking down at me.

I stared at the tinted orange liquid in the syringe and raised my eyebrows. "You inject that... With that?"

"Yes."

I shuffled towards the edge of the chair and got to my feet, shaking my head. "No way!"

He sighed. Loudly. "You're afraid of needles aren't you?"

I swallowed, my throat ridiculously dry and nodded. I'd never been scared of them before, but I knew the second that I'd seen this one that I didn't want it anywhere near my body. I took a few steps away from him, then paused and stared at him.

"Look, you'll barely feel it. Then, I'll have wires so that I can see what's going on whilst you're in the simulation. There's a tiny transmitter in the serum that sends data to the computer, so you'll only need to be injected once."

"Barely feel it?! Look at the size of that thing!" I exclaimed, my heart still pounding away in my chest.

He pursed his lips. "Just come and sit down, I promise I won't inject you, and we'll go from there."

I narrowed my eyes and stared at him. "No.. I can't." My feet felt like they were glued to the floor.

He rolled his eyes and put the syringe down, before getting to his feet and walking towards me.

My feet actually moved this time, pretty quickly, away from Four as he approached me. He had a determined look on his face that made me feel even more anxious than I already did.

I tried to push him away when he got close enough, but it didn't work, and he quickly grabbed me and threw me over his shoulder. I tried to wriggle away, but he held me tightly.

"Get off of me, Four!" I cried. "Put me down! You are not sticking that thing in my neck!"

He let out an irritated growl as I thumped on his back, before slinging me backwards onto the chair.

I placed my hands down on either side of me, trying to push myself out of the chair again, but a heavy weight on top of me restricted my movement.

I glared up at Four, starting to feel sick. _He'd fucking sat on me_.

"Get off!" I spat, still trying to wriggle away from him.

"You're more likely to get hurt with this thing if you keep moving around like that." He stated and I noticed that the needle was in his hand again.

"Keep it away from me!"

He quickly pressed his arm underneath my chin, and titled my head back, practically pinning my head to the chair.

Tears started to sting in my eyes as I realised that my neck was exposed again and he was going to inject me.

He quickly placed the tip of the needle into the tender skin on the side of my neck, and my breath caught in my throat. I winced and tried to focus on something else, anything else, his concentrated face the only thing I could currently see.

"The serum will go into effect in sixty seconds." He told me, and pulled the needle away from my neck. I stared up at him as he slowly climbed off of me. "This simulation is different from the aptitude test. In addition to containing the transmitter, the serum stimulates the amygdala, which is the part of the brain involved in processing negative emotions -like fear-and then induces a hallucination. The brain's electrical activity is then transmitted to our computer, which then translates your hallucination into a simulated image that I can see and monitor. I will then forward the recording to Dauntless administrators. You stay in the hallucination until you calm down-that is, lower your heart rate and control your breathing."

I tried to listen to what he was saying, but my heart was still pounding, and I could hear it loudly in my head, it was rather distracting.

My chest started to tighten, and my breaths became shorter and quicker until my eyes started to become heavy.

"Be brave." Were Four's last words, before I saw nothing but black.

* * *

My eyes fluttered open, and all I could see was a bright white light. It took a while for them to adjust before I realised that I was in a room with a white tiled roof. It reminded me of Erudite. I twisted my head to the right to see a desk, with a metal tray of objects beside me. I frowned and tried to sit up, wondering where I was.

Suddenly, I was shoved back down and the face of an unknown man stared down at me.

"Where do you think you're going?" He questioned.

"Where am I?" I asked, my heart doing it's usual trick.. thumping away.

He smirked. "You don't remember? Good. It's working."

I frowned again. "What is?!"

He didn't answer my question, and I heard footsteps approach from the other side of me, where the desk was.

"Pass me the syringe." The unknown man ordered, and I stared as an enormous needle switched between two hands right above my face.

The needle was larger than the one Four had put into my neck, and I started to panic, trying to sit up again. It was then that I realised that my arms and legs were strapped down.

"Let me out!" I cried.

The man chuckled. "Not a chance."

Hands pressed down hard on my shoulders, and I stared as the unknown man lowered the needle down to my neck.

I let out a whimper as the tip of the needle pushed down into my neck, the flesh burning.

The pain didn't relent, even when the needle was pulled out of my neck.

I took a deep breath, trying to blink away the tears, when I felt it again, on the inside of my left arm.

I let out another whimper, the pain never subsiding.

It happened again, on the other side of neck, then my right arm.

"S-stop!" I choked out, then gritted my teeth, my flesh burning.

"No." Was the short, snappy reply, before I felt the needle press into my hips.

I almost gagged as I felt the metal of the needle scrape against the bone of my hip. That shouldn't have happened.

I heard the footsteps as the man made his way around me, and I guessed he was heading for the other hip.

I tried to wriggle away again, the pain becoming worse as I did so. I couldn't get away, I was stuck.

And then I remembered... _It wasn't real_.

"You stay in the hallucination until you calm down-that is, lower your heart rate and control your breathing.." Four's voice echoed in my head and I knew what I had to do.

I squeezed my eyes shut as tightly as I could and tried to blank out everything around me.

I remembered the sound of the punchbags in the first stage of training. I concentrated on the thudding of it for a moment, remembering what it was like when my fists connected with the hard material.

I felt a small prick in my right hip and tried to push it out of my head.

I remembered the clacking sound of the train on the tracks from the first day that I'd become a Dauntless. The day that I'd met Talulah by pulling her onto the train.

I took a deep breath, then did it again and again, still imagining the train.

Suddenly, I am back in the metal chair and I quickly sit up, gasping for air. My hand flew to my left hip, and I rubbed it, expecting to feel some kind of sharp pain, but nothing.

A hand is placed on my shoulder, and I quickly pull away from it, my hand flying up to hit whoever it is.

Four caught my hand, and held it tightly. "It's just me. The hallucination's over."

He stared at me, and once he was certain that I wasn't going to try and hit him again, he let go of my hand. I moved it down to my hip still expecting to feel something, before reaching up to rub my neck.

There was a small bump there from the needle that Four had injected me with, and my eyes started to fill with tears. Thanks to him, I'd experienced a complete nightmare with needles.

"That was good. You only took eighteen minutes."

I bit down on my bottom lip and tried to blink back the tears that were threatening to fall.

"The first time is always the worst."

I scoffed and glared at him. "I'm never having one of those," I jabbed my finger in the direction of the needle on the desk. "_Things_ anywhere near me me ever again!"

He looked at me, no sympathy in his eyes at all. "The whole point of this is to overcome cowardice. If you feel like you can't continue because you're scared of a little needle, then you might as well leave now, because you won't be any use here."

I gritted my teeth together. So it was a choice between needles or Dauntless. _Great_.

I ran my hand through my hair and shuffled towards the edge of the chair. "How many more times am I going to have to do it?"

"A least seven. You'll be facing your fears everyday for the next week."

I swallowed, then took a deep breath. "Okay. Can I go now?"

"Yeah. Go out the back door." He told me. "Think about it, Jac. Is a needle really worth losing your life over?"

* * *

Nathan was laid on his bed, staring at the ceiling, when I arrived back at the accommodation. He didn't look up when I entered, and I slowly walked towards him, the room completely silent.

"What was yours?" I asked quietly, sitting on the edge of the bed.

He tilted his head to look at me. "Being drowned." He shuddered.

"That sounds horrible." I replied, biting down on my bottom lip.

"It was awful." He sighed. "What was yours?"

I brought my hand up to rub my neck again. "Needles."

He frowned. "I didn't realise you were scared of needles? I thought that you wanted to get a tattoo?"

"Neither did I." I felt the little bump on my neck and closed my eyes. "It appears that the giant one that Four wanted to stick in my neck brought it out."

"You didn't freak out before the simulation did you?"

I opened my eyes and looked at him, nodding. "Four had to sit on me to pin me down."

A small smile appeared on his lips.

I rolled my eyes. "That's right, use another's misfortune to cheer yourself up."

"Sorry..." He tried to suppress the smile by pursing his lips.

I half-smiled at him, then ran a hand through my hair. "How long did it take you to get out of your simulation?"

"Three minutes fifteen."

My mouth dropped open. "What?!"

He frowned. "What?"

"Mine took my eighteen minutes! That's ridiculous, how did you do it?!"

"I don't know... I just did it quickly.." He mumbled. "Four was surprised too."

I frowned. Being that quick was amazing, how did someone that ranked right at the bottom end up doing so well in this stage?

"Well, congrats, I guess." I said. "You'll definitely pass."

Talulah arrived back twenty minutes later, muttering something about having to help her sister give birth in her simulation before she headed for a shower to calm herself.

Freddie appeared about an hour later, looking as white as a sheet. He informed us that in his simulation he'd had acid poured over him, and stated that he could smell his skin burning. The thought of it made me cringe, and I hoped that it wasn't one of mine.

"I really need to get all this out of my head." Freddie said, from where he was laid on his bed. "Shall we go and do something?"

I shrugged. "Why not..."

Talulah hung her towel on the end of her bed, and scooped her hair up into a bun. "Can we go to the tattoo place? I want to get another one."

Freddie nodded. "Sure. I was thinking of looking at a few designs, see if I like anything."

"Great." Talulah smiled. "Didn't you say that you wanted one Jac?"

I swallowed and shook my head. "Not anymore."

Nathan chuckled. "She's no longer a fan of needles."

I remembered the needle touching my hip and shuddered. I definitely didn't want a tattoo any time soon.

Freddie looked confused. "What do you mean?"

"Four had to pin her down just to inject the serum."

Talulah frowned and put her hands on her hips. "I thought I'd heard more noise when you went it, everyone else had been pretty quiet."

"It was really big..." I attempted to defend myself.

"It wasn't too bad.." Freddie said, raising an eyebrow.

"Are you kidding? It was fine! Didn't even hurt!" Nathan cried.

I rolled my eyes.

"Well, I thought it was kind of scary. I'd much rather have drank the serum like in the aptitude tests." Talulah told us. "Anyway, seeings as you've now got a fear of needles, will you be able to come and watch us get tattoos? Or shall we go another time without you?"

I felt bad for wanting to say no. They all clearly wanted to go, and it would've been unfair to make them all do something else because I didn't want to. "It's fine. I'll come."

* * *

Once we'd arrived at the tattoo parlor, Talulah had ran off to get Bud to help draw out the tattoo that she'd envisioned. Nathan and Freddie searched through the displays for something they'd like, and I stood just behind them anxiously.

The sound of the tattoo guns made me feel a little sick, and incredibly nervous. The vision of the needles digging into skin made me cringe, and I tried my best to push the thoughts out of my head.

"You don't look so good..." Freddie looked at me.

"I'm a little freaked out." I told him quietly.

"Maybe actually getting one will help you get over it?"

I viscously shook my head. "No. I'm not ready for that."

He looked at me sympathetically. "I can get a new tattoo another day... Wanna get out of here?"

I nodded and he put his arm around my shoulders, and led me over to where Talulah was.

"We're going to go look in some other shops." He told her.

"Okay! I'll see you later?"

I nodded and said goodbye, then Freddie and I headed out into the Pit.

"Where'd you wanna go?" He asked, once we were outside.

"Um.. No idea."

He sighed and looked around. "Lu's up there." He pointed to one of the platforms. "Want to go say hi?"

"Sure."

We wandered over to Lu, who was sat with Calvin. I'd not seen her properly in a few days, yet it'd felt like forever.

"Hey sweet!" She greeted me, then looked up at Freddie. "Freds."

"Lu." He acknowledged her, then pulled his arm away from me and sat opposite the two older Dauntless.

"How've you guys been? Did you start stage two today?"

"Yeah.." I mumbled, and sat down too.

Lu glanced at me, then looked back at Freddie. "Not good?"

He shook his head. "You could have warned us about how horrible stage two is!"

"We're not allowed to tell you anything about stage two, that's why!" She replied.

"We'd have loved to help, but our mouths are pressed firmly shut on the leader's orders." Calvin said, pursing his lips as an example.

"How come the leaders don't want you to tell us about it?" I questioned.

"They want you to figure it out for yourselves. If we help you, then some of the Divergents may slip through." Calvin answered.

"Divergents?" Freddie sounded confused. "I didn't realise that they were real."

"Very real, and according to the Dauntless leaders; very dangerous."

I frowned. "Wow... Have you guys ever met one before?"

They both shook their heads.

"If we had, we wouldn't tell you." Lu spoke up. "It's not safe to talk about any of this. We should avoid anything to do with Divergence."

"Why?" I questioned.

"You ask too many questions." Calvin stated, and slowly got to his feet. "I need to get back to work. I'll see you later."

I watched as he tousled Lu's hair and how she pushed him away before saying goodbye. He then walked away, and disappeared out of the Pit.

"Where does he work?" Freddie asked.

"In the control room. He's had to work double time recently, covering for Four whilst he trains you lot."

"How come you're never at work?" I pondered.

"I work on the fence, so I'm on straight for three weeks, then I've got three off. I'm back out there on Wednesday."

"Is that a good job?" Freddie questioned. "What did you rank?"

"I was fifth. Two years ago." She answered. "Everything's changed since then though, Max has added new rules, they started off small last year when your instructors trained, but made them even stricter this year. It's harder to get better jobs."

"Wait, Four and Eric only trained last year?"

She nodded. "Yeah."

_Of course they had. It explained why everyone was so shocked at Eric being a leader because he was so young. As if he was only a year older than me? In fact, he could be just a few months older than me... wow. _

"They seem like they've been doing it for years though?" Freddie said.

"Then clearly they're good at it." Lu shrugged. "Lauren and Isla are my age, I think Four meets with them most days before he wakes you guys up just to get a few tips on what to do. Lauren did the transfers last year with Harrison, so she would've trained them."

"They were transfers?!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Of course! If Eric was a transfer, then so was Four..." I mumbled, not having pieced it together before.

"Yeah." Lu nodded. "Wait, you knew Eric was a transfer?"

I slowly nodded.

"How?"

I thought about it for a second. Eric'd asked me to keep quiet about him being a transfer. It was only fair that I did my part of the deal after he told me what I wanted. "I just guessed when I painted his apartment." I looked at Freddie. "Don't tell anyone though, I don't think he wants everyone to know, especially not the initiates."

He frowned. "Why does it matter what he wants?"

"Everyone deserves a bit of privacy, and it's not our place to tell anyone else."

I noticed Lu raise an eyebrow.

"What?"

"You're being very friendly to someone that punished you and forced you to do his dirty work for him.." She said.

I shrugged. "What can I say? I'm a nice person."

She snorted. "I'll believe that when I see it!"

"Hey!" I leant towards her and softly pushed her shoulder.

She tried to dodge me and laughed.

I giggled too, and heard Freddie laughing beside me. Even though stage two had started out terribly, I was still glad to be here. Four's ultimatum had left me stumped earlier, but I knew now that I'd have to face that particular fear, and probably many others, to continue with this life... And there was nothing that I wanted more.


	12. Chapter 12

The next afternoon as I walked into the room at the end of the dark hallway, I very nearly turned and walked out again. Behind me, shutting the door, was Four, and leant up against the desk, was Eric.

Today, they'd split us into two groups mixed up of transfers and Dauntless-borns, and taken some in the morning, then continued after lunch. Talulah had told me that she had been covered in insects that smothered her mouth and eyes and she'd ended the simulation crying so hysterically that Four had to walk her back to the accommodation.

She'd said nothing about Eric being in there.

"What's he doing here?" I looked over my shoulder at Four.

"I am here, because I heard you were difficult to maintain yesterday." Eric answered my question before Four even opened his mouth, and I turned to look at him.

"Difficult to maintain?" I scoffed. "You try facing a real fear, then having to face another one in a simulation seconds afterwards."

Eric rolled his eyes. "Shut up and sit down."

I took a deep breath, then slowly walked towards the chair.

Four crossed over to the desk, and started to press buttons on it.

I perched on the edge of the chair, my palms feeling clammy again. I really didn't want a needle in my neck again, but I had to. _I had to_.

"Hurry up and sit back initiate. I don't want to be here all day." Eric grumbled.

I turned and glared at him. "I don't want to be here at all, so it looks like we're both out of luck!" I snapped.

"Get out then." Eric ordered, jabbing a finger towards the door.

"Stop bickering." Four ordered in a monotone voice. "You're like an old married couple."

I screwed my nose up. Marrying this asshole would be the worst possible thing that any human being could do. "I think you just introduced me to my next fear..." I grumbled.

I watched as Four suppressed a smirk by biting his lip and Eric glared at me.

"Seeing this needle being shoved into your neck is going to give me great pleasure." He sneered, and my chest became tight. I'd almost forgotten the reason that he was here.

I swallowed and sat back anxiously, getting myself comfortable.

"Okay. You ready?" Four asked, preparing the syringe.

"No..." I mumbled, staring at what he was doing with his hands.

Eric sighed, and I felt his hand on my cheek as he twisted my head so that I was looking at him. "Watching the syringe won't help. You have to forget it's there."

I blinked a few times, and attempted to swallow again, my throat feeling dry.

"Just like in the simulation, you have to calm yourself and steady your breathing." Four told me.

Eric walked around me, so that he was stood on the other side of the chair, and my eyes darted back to Four.

"What did I just say?" Eric grumbled, and grabbed my face again, pulling it towards him.

I felt Four's fingertip lightly brush against the skin on my neck as he moved my hair out of the way just like last time.

It became harder to breath when I realised that he was seconds away from injecting me. I tensed up, wanting to quickly jump up and run away.

"Give me your hands." Eric ordered.

I didn't question it, just did as he asked, and he placed them down on the arm of the chair, before putting a hand on top of them.

I watched as he shared a look with Four, before reaching up to press a hand to my jaw, lifting my head slightly so that my neck was completely exposed.

"I-I can't..." I choked out, and tried to wriggle away, but Eric pressed down harder on my face and hands.

The cool metal of the needle pressed against the tender skin on my neck and my eyes began to fill with panicked tears. I winced and stared at Eric, trying to count his piercings.

I stopped when I felt the needle being pulled away from me, and Eric's hands releasing me. I shuffled in my seat, and sniffed trying to prepare myself for the next fear that I would have to overcome.

"You know the drill, Jac. Sixty seconds and the hallucination will begin... Fight your fears, or find a way to calm yourself and slow your heart rate." Four spoke, and I tried to listen as the usual symptoms of fear began to take over my body once more.

I blinked, and when my eyes reopened I was leant on the railings at the top of the Chasm, just like the other night. I stared down at the water in the bottom, wondering why and how I even got here.

Suddenly, arms wrapped around me and two hands placed themselves on my hips. This action startled me, and I snapped around to see who had done it.

I frowned when I saw Eric.

"Good afternoon." He smiled.

"Uh... Hey.." I mumbled, and tried to wriggle away from his touch.

He noticed, and moved his hands to place them on the railings either side of me.

"Are you okay?" He questioned, frowning slightly.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just peachy." I answered, thinking of a way to get out of his reach. "Actually I'm kinda tired, do you mind if I go?"

I slid out underneath his arm, and tried to squeeze past, but he quickly reached out and gripped my upper arm tightly. "What is up with you?"

"Nothing, can I just go now, please?"

An angered expression spread across his facial features and he yanked me back to the railing, my back pressed up against it. "Seriously what is the deal with you?"

"N-nothing..." I mumbled, looking around for a way to leave again.

He placed his hands on the railings again, and pressed his body flush against mine.

My breath caught in my throat and I leant back a little, well aware that I was leaning over the railing right above the Chasm.

"Tell me." He demanded.

I shook my head and tried to push him away, but he gripped a hold of my wrist and pushed me further over the railing, lifting me off of my feet slightly.

"What?! Are you going to kill me like you did Rita because I'm not doing what you want?!" I spat, my heart pounding in my chest, my head spinning.

_I shouldn't have said that. _

He shook me roughly, and I was most definitely hanging off of the edge of the Chasm, he had full control of what happened next.

"Say that again." He growled in a deep voice.

"Are you going to kill me, like you did Rita?" I questioned, through gritted teeth.

He released my wrist and his hand struck my face hard, before he chuckled, a dark glint in his eye.

"Yes." He sneered, then shoved me, as hard as he could.

I fell, wind rushing through my hair, my stomach dropping, and a loud scream escaped my mouth. I felt like I was suspended in the air for eternity, until finally there was a thump and a loud crack filled my ears, pain scorching it's way through my body. Everything in my sight started to go black, until I could no longer see a thing.

* * *

I lurched upwards, a loud gasp escaping from inside me. I breathed heavily, choking on my breaths until I realised where I was.

_I wasn't dead in the bottom of the Chasm. I was still on the chair in the little room_.

I heard an irritated scoff and looked to my left. Eric was staring at the computer screen, shaking his head slightly. His tensed jaw clearly showed that he was angry, and I cowered away from him, my eyes quickly darting around the room to search for Four.

"W-where's Four?" I asked quietly, my heart thumping.

"Not here." Eric answered bluntly. I looked up at him, and his eyes still hadn't left the computer screen. "You think I killed her."

"No.. I don't know..." I mumbled.

He turned to look at me, and I found a look in his eye that I had never seen before... _Hurt_.

"You don't know?" He snapped, then raised his voice. "You don't know?! That looked pretty fucking clear to me, Jacquetta, not like you don't know! You've even got that accusing look in your eyes, right now. The one that Four, and Calvin, and tonnes of other fucking people have had in their eyes for the past six months!"

"Eric, I don't-" I started to speak, to try and calm him down, but he cut me off.

"You don't what?! Huh?! You think I did it. Just like all the rest of them!" He jabbed a finger in the direction of the back door. "Well you're wrong. You're all fucking wrong! I did not kill Rita, she fell, and it has eaten away inside of me ever since. There was nothing, _nothing_, I could do to stop it."

He glared at me, then shook his head and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

I stared after him in awe, my heart slowly sinking in my chest. I'd unconsciously been blaming him all of this time for the death of a woman that I'd never met, and he'd seen it through a computer screen. Guilty wasn't the word to describe how I felt.

I pulled my knees up to my chest as a lump formed in my throat, and I started to sob. I was unsure whether the reason behind my tears was because of the way he had shouted at me, the fact that the initiates outside might have heard it, or the fact that I had been so cruel to him, but I felt bloody awful and I was unsure how to react.

A few minutes later, the door behind me opened and I heard Four's voice. "Jac, what's happened? I've just seen Eric out there, he's absolutely fuming..."

I accidentally let out a loud sob, and Four made his way to my side, a cup held tightly in his hands.

"Jac?"

I looked up at him and tried to wipe away the tears. "How much did you see of my simulation?"

"Not much, just you looking into the chasm. Eric offered to watch whilst I grabbed a drink."

My bottom lip wobbled and I tried to blink back the liquid in my eyes. "I accused him of killing Rita... before he pushed me off of the Chasm."

Four frowned.

"And then when I came round he shouted at me." I sniffed. "Told me that I had an accusing look on my face, just like you and Calvin, then yelled about how he didn't do it and stormed out."

Four sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Alright... Okay."

"What do I do, Four? I feel awful." I blurted out.

"Nothing. You do nothing." He ordered. "You stay away from Eric, and if you happen to cross paths, don't say a single word. You'll make it worse for yourself. He knows how to carry a grudge."

"But-"

"No buts, Jac. Stay away." He looked down at me sternly, then went over to the computer screen. "You managed to get out of the simulation in fifteen minutes, ten seconds. That's an improvement from yesterday."

I nodded, not really paying attention.

"Go on, go back to the other initiates now... And remember what I said."

* * *

"You look terrible." Talulah stated, as I slowly dragged myself towards my bed.

"I feel it." I mumbled and threw the sheets back.

"What was it this time?" She asked.

I shook my head, not allowing myself to think about it. I slid my boots off, then climbed into bed and buried myself under the sheets, staring at the small black shoe that was sat on the floor beside Talulah's bed.

"Jac... surely it can't have been that bad? It wasn't real remember." Talulah stood up and crossed over to my bed.

The tears started to sting in my eyes again. "It wasn't the simulation..."

Talulah's face fell as she perched on the edge of my bed. "What's happened? You're scaring me..."

"He didn't do it. He didn't kill her."

"Who?" She frowned.

"Eric. He didn't kill Rita."

"Then why are you so upset?" She was incredibly confused.

"He shouted at me, and he looked hurt... I actually upset him!" I cried.

She sighed and pushed my hair out of my face. "Why does that bother you so much? It's only Eric."

Her questioned stumped me. _Why was I so upset about it? _

"You didn't see it, Tee. It wasn't like him. He... He... I don't know."

"He'll get over it." She smiled softly at me. "You're not the only one that thought he did it. You're just the one that gave him the last final push before he exploded. It's not your fault."

I bit down on my bottom lip, and used my sleeve to wipe my eyes.

"Don't worry about him. No one likes him anyway. You've got us to worry about; me, Nathan, Freddie, Lu... We need you more than he ever will. Fussing over him from where you are, curled up under your sheets, won't help him and won't help you either."

Her words made sense, but didn't ease the feeling inside of me. In fact, they had made me feel a little worse. I'd caused this big, enigmatic man to lose his cool and to be hurt, and I wasn't even allowed to try and fix it.

"Come on you, silly moo." She patted my leg. "Lets go and find the others."

I shook my head. "I'm sorry, Tee. I just feel like being alone."

She slowly stood up and nodded. "That's alright. Remember what I said though, worrying about him from there won't help him.. or you."

"Okay..."

I watched her leave the room, then rolled over onto my other side and closed my eyes. Somehow, my mind stayed blank and I slowly drifted off to sleep.

* * *

When my eyes slowly flickered open again some time later, it was pitch black. I rolled onto my back, and figured that I must have slept through the rest of the day.

My stomach grumbled, and I realised that I'd missed dinner too. I quietly sighed, unsure of what to do.

I doubted that anyone would still be in the kitchens, and the dining hall would have been empty for sure. I didn't really have anywhere to get food from.

I decided that the best option would be to roll over and go back to sleep, but instead of doing that, I threw my sheets back and clambered to my feet. The floor was cold, so I searched around in the darkness for my boots before tip-toeing out into the hallway. It was fairly dark out here, but there were faint lights dangling from the ceiling, and I could just about see to put my shoes on.

I wandered around the compound for a bit, not coming across anyone at all. I hadn't seen a clock, so I was unsure of the time, but I was certain that it was after midnight.

I walked for a little bit longer, past the infirmary, past the dining hall - my stomach rumbling again as I did, and found myself at the Chasm.

My heart began to sink again, and my hands felt clammy, reminding me of the previous day's events. I wanted to walk away from the Chasm, and curl back up in bed, but my feet felt glued to the floor.

"What are you doing up?" The voice made me jump, but the person that it belonged to made me lost for words.

Eric walked around me, and paused in front of me. His face hard, void of any emotion. I stared at him, unable to find my voice.

"Don't worry. I'm not going to push you into the Chasm." He said, and I thought I'd picked up on a hint of sarcasm, but I was fairly unsure. "What? Are you not talking to me now?"

I opened my mouth, hoping that the right words would come out. "I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "No you're not."

"I am..." I frowned.

He shook his head again and pursed his lips.

My mouth opened and shut a few times as I searched for the words to say, to explain how everything had happened, but I failed.

"I didn't see you at dinner." He stated.

_He was looking for me?_ "No... I slept through it. No one woke me up."

"Oh..." He said. "You must be hungry."

I shrugged. "A little." _It was a lie. I was starving._

"Do you want something? I've got food at mine.."

"Your apartment?"

"Yeah..." He looked at me, his face still void of any emotion.

"Um.. Yes, please. If it's not any bother..."

"It's not." He replied and gestured towards the hallway behind him. "Come on then."

My feet unstuck themselves from the floor, and I walked to his side, before he turned and headed in the direction we needed to go.

"Why were you awake?" I asked quietly.

"I couldn't sleep."

I bit down on my lip. That was more than likely my fault.

"What about you?" He asked.

"I guess I slept too much."

He nodded and kept his eyes locked on what was in front of us.

"Why are you being so nice to me? I was awful to you."

"You can't help it if you're easily led astray."

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, it's not your fault that you believed what everyone else was saying. You just wanted to fit in."

I felt slightly insulted at his words. "Uh, no. I'm not led astray, and I didn't believe it because I wanted to fit in. It was what seemed like the most logical answer after I heard the story." I told him.

His jaw tensed again, like it had earlier on.

"Is this all this is? You don't really care about whether I'm hungry or not... You're just trying to lead me astray and change my mind."

He sighed and glared at me. "What do you want me to do, Jac?! Drag you back there and dangle you off of the Chasm just to prove your point that I'm a pyscho? Because I don't know what you want."

I shook my head. "No..."

"Let me guess, you don't know."

"Yeah..."

He sighed again and paused, twisting to look at me. "I don't care what you think of me, I don't care what everyone thinks of me or thinks that I have done. So right now, this second, I'm just trying to do my job."

"Which is?" I questioned quietly.

"Looking after the initiates and overseeing their training." He answered. "You're hungry, so I'm going to give you food."

He continued to walk, and a few minutes later we arrived at his apartment after walking in complete silence. He unlocked the door and allowed me to walk in first, before pushing the door shut behind us. He reached out and flicked the lights on, before pulling off his jacket and chucking it on the table.

I hovered by the door as he made his way into the kitchen, and I heard a refrigerator open.

"I don't really have much... I can make you a sandwich if you like?" He called through and then I heard a cupboard open. "Or soup and bread."

"What soup is it?" I asked, slowly approaching the room that he was in.

"Chicken."

"Uh, yeah. The soup please."

"Okay."

I watched as he opened the can of soup and poured it into a pot that he pulled out of the cupboard, and placed it on the cooker to heat it up.

"If you have food in here, why do you eat in the dining hall?"

"I like to eat with the other leaders. I only eat here if I'm in a hurry, or want to avoid people." He looked over his shoulder at me, and I nodded. "You can go and sit down in there if you want."

"Okay. I promise I won't touch anything this time." I attempted humour, but didn't get any form of reaction from him.

I wandered into the main room again, and over to the black couch. I took a seat beside the wall, and noticed that he'd finished decorating without my help.

He entered the room a few moments later, a bowl of soup in his hand, a spoon and a few slices of bread in the other.

He handed them to me, then took a seat beside me.

I tucked in straight away, scooping a spoonful of soup into my mouth.

He watched me for a few seconds, then looked away.

"This is nice. Thank you." I spoke, breaking the silence that had settled between us.

"Lets not make it a habit." He replied.

"Yeah.." I agreed, and bit into a slice of bread. Once I'd swallowed what was in my mouth, I spoke again. "About earlier..."

"No." He turned his head to look at me. "Don't say sorry again."

"But I am sorry!" I cried. "I accused you of killing a woman that I'd never actually met based upon what I'd heard from other people. It was out of order."

His jaw tensed again. "Because if someone dies when they're with me, I had to have killed them, it couldn't possibly have been an accident because I'm just some big emotionless guy, that doesn't care about anything." He muttered.

I shook my head. "I know that's wrong now."

He looked slightly amused. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

He rolled his eyes. "What changed?"

"I noticed that look in your eyes when you were shouting at me. You looked hurt, the last thing that I'd ever expected to see from you."

He frowned.

"On the outside you've got this big macho man exterior, but inside... you're hurting. You do care. You care about peoples opinions - even if you don't want to, you care about your job, and you cared about..." I trailed off, deciding not to finish my sentence because I wasn't actually certain if I was speaking the truth.

"About her?"

I nodded. "Yeah..."

He sighed and fiddled with one of the piercings in his eyebrow.

"So I am sorry. Because I was wrong, and I completely misjudged you. Like most people."

He stared at the floor and didn't say another word.

I finished my meal, then got up and carried the empty bowl into the kitchen. I started to run some water into the sink, but a hand reached out and turned the faucet off.

"Don't worry about it. I'll do it later." Eric said from beside me.

"Oh.. okay." I nodded and stepped out of the way. "Thanks again."

"No problem."

"I guess you'll want me out of the way now.." I gestured towards the front door. "So, I'll leave."

He shook his head. "You don't have to go right now, but if you want to then I'll walk you."

I glanced up at the clock. It was almost four in the morning. "I should try and get more sleep... Before Talulah wakes me up in three hours."

He rolled his eyes and muttered; "Amity." Then looked back down at me.

I smiled slightly. Even if he'd kind of just complained about my best friend, it was nice to see that he hadn't completely broken down.

"Come on then. Lets get you back."

I nodded and followed him to the door. "Thanks again, I know I keep saying it.. but I feel like I need to let you know how much I appreciate it."

He nodded. "As I said, don't make it habit."

"I won't."

"Good, because I don't shop for two." He glanced down at me and smirked, and I grinned back.


	13. Chapter 13

Over the next few days my training consisted of the same routine; being pinned to the chair by Eric and being injected with the serum by Four, before facing my fears. I'd experienced the needle one again, as well as a few new ones such as being trapped in a box with huge spiders and being buried alive.

As the days had passed, I'd felt less anxious every time I'd walked into the room, and Eric and Four had found that they didn't need to be as cautious with me. Eric had been less rough with me after the night that I ate at his, and his presence was strangely calming for me... Now that I knew he wasn't a murderer and all that. Deep down, the guy did have a heart, and not very many people were determined enough to get to it.

We'd not spoken properly since then, I figured I'd have to save him the embarrassment of admitting that he opened up to me a little bit, and had only exchanged a few words in front of Four. I'd noticed Four look a little surprised that Eric hadn't purposely tried to hurt me whilst pinning me down, or made a snide comment about something that I did, and I kept expecting him to question it, yet he never did.

As today's simulation ended and I tried to catch my breath, hunched over in the chair after being smothered by spiders, I noticed that Eric had already left.

"Where's Eric?" I asked, tucking my hair behind my ear.

"Gone to a meeting." Four replied, fiddling with the computer. "You didn't listen to me, did you? You went to talk to him about it."

I shook my head. "No... I did listen, Talulah told me the same thing too."

"Then why isn't he still angry with you? He still death glares at me every time we're in the same room."

I shrugged. "Clearly he doesn't just hate you for thinking he killed Rita, he must hate you for something else too."

Four rolled his eyes and said nothing else on the matter. "You did that in twelve minutes, seven seconds. Much better than before. You're improving just like we'd hoped.

I nodded. "Great. Who's got the best time so far?"

"Nathan."

I nodded again. I had a feeling that his answer would be Nathan, each day he'd told me his times and not once had he gone over five minutes. He was ridiculously fast. _But that also worried me. _James had become increasingly jealous of him, and with no one but a few Dauntless-born's to talk to, I had gotten the impression that he was sitting and stewing alone, and soon enough he was going to burst. I didn't want Nathan to be the victim of James' fury when the time came.

"How come he manages to do his so quickly?"

"I'm not allowed to discuss that with you. You'll have to ask him."

I sighed. "Okay." I got to my feet, after checking for creepy crawlies, and walked towards the door.

"Oh, Lu told me to ask you to meet her in the dining hall at one, something about wanting to wish you luck before she leaves."

"Okay." I smiled at him, then pulled the door open. "See you later, Four."

He nodded but didn't say anything, so I pulled the door shut behind me and headed back to the accommodation.

* * *

Talulah was stretched out on her bed reading a newspaper, looking bored.

"I didn't realise you read the paper?" I questioned.

She looked up at me and dropped the newspaper on her lap. "I don't. Freddie left it on the floor so I thought I'd take a look while I was waiting for you."

"Oh... anything interesting in it?"

"Just some article about the Abnegation leader abusing his son."

I rolled my eyes. "Written by the Erudite right? For some reason our leader really hated the Abnegation."

"Jeanine Matthews? Doesn't she just hate everyone?"

I smirked. "Pretty much."

She giggled. "How did your training go?"

"Covered in spiders again, took me just over twelve minutes.. and I'm getting a bit better with the injecting of the serum too."

She smiled. "That's good. You're improving! Only a minute quicker than me too!"

I grinned. "Don't be getting jealous now sweetie." I teased.

"Are you kidding? I could easily take you on!" She exclaimed, grinning back at me.

"Come on then, bring it!"

She pushed the newspaper off of her and hopped up onto her feet. She nudged me with her hip, then pushed me backwards so that we were no longer stood between the two beds.

"Ooo." I made an impressed noise, still grinning at her and held my fists up in a defensive position.

She copied my noise and held her fists up too. "Hit me."

"All this fighting talk and you won't even go first!" I joked.

"Hit me!" She repeated, and I sent a jab to her shoulder.

She blocked it, then darted forwards and knocked me off of my feet.

I gasped as I hit the floor, then giggled and yanked her down too before rolling over and sitting on her. She tried to wriggle out from underneath me and pushed at my legs.

I laughed. "Thought you could take me, Tee?"

She grinned. "Oh I can." She reached up and grabbed my side and I let out a loud squeal and pulled away from her.

_How on earth did she find out that I was ticklish?!_

She tore herself out from beneath me and flung herself forwards, grabbing me again and tickling me.

I thrashed around trying to get away from her, but fell backwards and she sat on my legs, still tickling me.

I squealed loudly and tried to smack her hands away. "Okay, okay!"

"Okay what?" She asked, smirking whilst she reached up to tickle my neck.

I titled my head to block her fingers' access. "Okay you win!"

She laughed and let out a loud whoop.

"Stop tickling me!" I cried and she laughed again, before pulling her hands away.

"What is going on?" Nathan's confused voice came from the door, and the two of us snapped our heads up to look at him.

He and Freddie were stood in the doorway, looking confused yet amused.

I opened my mouth to answer his question, but all that came out was a loud laugh.

My body shook with laughter, and Talulah looked down at me before a small smile tugged at the edge of her lips and she let out a giggle.

The two of us remained tangled together on the floor laughing hysterically for a few minutes, and our two male friends slowly made their way towards us, smiling slightly.

"You two creep me out." Nathan said, looking down at us.

Talulah flopped off of me and onto her back before reaching her arm out for Nathan to pull her up.

I slowly stopped laughing, and caught my breath, still smiling as I watched the two of them. They'd never confirmed that they were together, but they acted just like you'd expect a couple to. I was certain that they had little tender moments between them when they thought no one was looking, and Freddie and I had even pretended to not notice the little kisses and cuddles they'd exchanged, purely to avoid any embarrassment for them.

Talulah turned and pulled me up, then the four of us stood together discussing what to do for the rest of the day.

"I want to get that tattoo I liked.. don't you need to get yours coloured Tee?" Freddie questioned.

"Yeah, we should go and do that!" Talulah smiled. "Oh.. but what about you, Jac?"

I shrugged. "It's okay, I'll just hang about here until I meet Lu at one."

"No, I need your help." Nathan spoke up.

"Mine?" I raised a confused eyebrow.

"Yeah, I need some new boots, but seeings as Tee's going to be getting her tattoo, you can come and help me find some instead."

I nodded. "Yeah sure. So that's a plan then?"

"Yeah." Talulah smiled, and Nathan and Freddie nodded.

"Lets go then!" Freddie grabbed his jacket from the end of the bed, then the four of us made our way towards the Pit.

We parted ways outside the tattoo parlor, and Nathan and I headed in the direction of the shoe shop.

"I don't really need shoes..."

I paused and turned to look at him. "Then why are we walking towards the shoe shop?"

"We're not..." He pointed towards the shop on it's right.

"The jewellery store?"

He nodded. "I want to get Tee something. Like a bracelet, or necklace."

I smiled. "You're really good to her."

"I really like her." He grinned.

"I thought as much!"

He chuckled. "I'm planning on giving her the present tonight... I've got a plan and everything."

"Do tell..." I urged him to continue.

"Well, I mentioned to Lu this morning that I wanted to do something nice for Tee, and she gave me the spare keys to her apartment."

"What? She's just handed you control of her home?"

"I have to give the keys to Calvin first thing tomorrow, but she said that I'm free to use it tonight."

I smiled again. "So you're going to have a cute little night alone at Lu's?"

He nodded. "I'm also going to ask her to be my girlfriend. Like officially."

I fought the urge to let out a squeal. "She'll be so happy!"

"You think?"

"Yeah! No doubt about it!" I grinned at him again. He and Talulah were going to make it official! _How cute!_

* * *

When I met with Lu at one, I found her sat at a table munching on a chocolate-chip muffin. I took a seat beside her, and watched as she took a large mouthful then chewed it up and swallowed it.

"Afternoon!" She chirped.

"Hey." I smiled and poured myself a drink.

"How have you been?"

"Other than having to face my fears everyday, being injected with a huge needle whilst being pinned down by Eric, and not being able to sleep at regular times, I think I've been okay." I answered.

She laughed. "You complain every time I see you."

"Well, you asked." I shrugged and downed the contents of my cup.

"I hear that you pissed off Eric a few days ago."

I sighed. "Yeah... Four told me all about Rita, and then one of my fears was being pushed over the Chasm by Eric."

She pulled a face. "But why would that piss him off? I'm sure he'd get great joy from shoving an initiate over the edge of the Chasm?"

I shook my head. "No. He's not that cold hearted. He wouldn't."

She frowned. "And how would you know?"

I shrugged. "I just do."

"I suppose this leads to my next question..."

"Which is?"

"Why were you in his apartment the other night?"

I raised an eyebrow. "How do you know about that?" _No one should have known. _

"Calvin told me."

_Two people knew?! _"How does he know?"

"He works in the control room. He can see everything, except what goes on _inside_ the apartments. He was actually kind of worried about you."

I frowned. "Why?"

"You know why! He doesn't like Eric, because of what happened to Rita, he doesn't want you to be in the same position."

"So he sent you to warn me away?" I shook my head. "He needn't have worried. Eric won't hurt me."

She let out an exasperated sigh. "Oh you don't understand, do you?!"

"Well, no.. Apparently not!"

"You can't be sure that he won't hurt you!" She harshly poked my bandaged arm. I winced. The slice in my arm had closed slightly, but it was still fairly painful at times. "Remember this?! He threw a knife at you for gods sake! It's crazy how blind you can be! What did he say to you? Did he promise you something that no one else but a leader can give you?!"

I gritted my teeth together. "He didn't promise me anything. He let his guard drop for a little while, and I saw something that no one else bothers to look for!"

She opened her mouth to snap a reply, but stopped and slowly took in what I'd said. "Oh no... Jac, you don't _like_ him, do you?"

"What? No.." I told her. I wasn't lying. I'd never even thought about him like that...

"Hm." She slowly nodded. "Well, I'm just warning you now. He's never been a particularly nice person, and I don't think he's ever had a friend that's stuck around for more than five minutes. Most people tend to avoid him, with the exception of the other leaders, and you'd have a lucky escape if you stayed away."

"I'll take that into consideration, but it's my own decision when it comes to what company I keep. I'd like to say I'm a level-headed girl, so I'll know when I'm in any danger." I said. "I appreciate it that you're protecting me from whatever you think it is that's going to hurt me, but you don't need to. Now, I don't want to discuss it anymore, I dislike feeling like I want to punch you."

"I'd like to see you try," She smirked. "But you wouldn't ever do it.. You love me too much. Just be careful, Jac, that's all I'm saying."

"Okay." I nodded.

"Anyway," She popped the last of her muffin into her mouth, chewed it up, then continued. "I'm leaving later, I'll be catching the train at three. Did Nathan tell you about what I've given him?"

I nodded. "It was really nice of you to do that."

She shrugged. "I'd have liked to think if the roles were reversed that he'd do the same for me."

"Yeah."

"I need you to do something for me though."

"What?"

"Well, I'm not too sure how _well_ their relationship is going and stuff... so I'm guessing there's a possibility that they'll be intimate whilst they're alone,"

I bit my lip. _Wow_. I'd never even thought about the possibility that they'd have an intimate adult relationship. It made me realise how naive I could actually be.

"And well, I kind of just want you to potter about and tidy up any mess they make, maybe change my bed sheets too? I'd ask Nathan to do it, but I think I'll save the poor boy the embarrassment of discussing it with me."

"Sure, but I don't have a key..."

"Get it off of Calvin some time tomorrow evening. I'll tell him that you'll be coming for it."

I nodded. "Okay."

She smiled at me. "Thank you! I knew I could trust you!"

"It's okay." I grabbed a muffin.

She checked her watch. "Right, well, I'd better finish packing my bags and say goodbye to Calvin."

I looked up at her, feeling slightly disappointed. This would be the last time that I saw her until after initiation ended.

"Good luck, not that you need it because you're definitely made for Dauntless, and I'll see you in a few weeks." She stood up and kissed the top of my head, then left.

* * *

Talulah and Nathan disappeared at the end of dinner, leaving Freddie and I sat with a few of the Dauntless born. I noticed that Freddie suppressed a smirk as he watched them leave, and I figured he knew where they were going.

"So what was in everyone's simulations today then?" Daisy asked, her eyes flitting around the table.

"Drowning." Dale replied, biting into a carrot stick.

"Shooting my Mom." Kendall, the dark skinned girl that Four had chosen for his capture the flag team, spoke.

"That was mine too." Martin frowned. "Mom and Sarah."

"Mine was an accident with acid again." Freddie said, and I screwed up my nose. That one sucked. I knew how scary bad chemical reactions could be, and having to sit through having your skin burnt, hallucination or not, would be awful.

"Spiders smothering me." I told her.

Daisy frowned at all of them. "They're all horrible."

"What was yours?" I questioned.

"Heights." She shuddered. "I have no idea how you got up on that roof when we played capture the flag. I'd have probably passed out!"

I shrugged. "Eric helped."

"I doubt he helped much." Kendall spoke up. "He may be good looking, but from what I've seen and heard, he's a super asshole."

I looked down at the table and clenched my jaw. W_hat was everyone's obsession with being mean about him? _

I nearly rolled my eyes at myself. A few weeks ago I'd have agreed with them, yet now I get irritated every time someone makes the slightest comment about Eric. The guy dropped his guard with me for a second, and has barely spoken to me since, yet I'm defending him at any possible chance? I really didn't understand what was going on in my head...

"You okay?" Freddie's lowered voice sounded in my ear, and I twisted my head to look at him.

"I need some air..." I told him, and he nodded.

"I know the exact place." He stated, then stood up and held his hand out for me.

I hesitated before taking his hand and getting to my feet, then allowed him to pull me off to wherever he wanted to go.

We walked in silence until we reached the place where everything had started. The net.

He pulled it down for me. "Ladies first."

I smiled and hopped up onto the net, crawling towards the centre. He followed, and the pair of us laid side by side, staring up through the hole.

"I'd never thought of coming here..." I spoke.

"I've been here a few times since training started. I figured that no one ever came here. It's just where the initiates jump."

I nodded. "It's a good idea."

We laid in silence for a few moments, and I closed my eyes, just feeling the cold air smother me.

"Do you ever miss Erudite?" He questioned.

I opened my eyes and turned my head to look at him. He was already looking at me. I thought about his question. I missed my family, but not really the faction. I'd never been fully comfortable there.

"Not really. I miss being able to pick up a book at any moment and read it, and I miss my parents, but I didn't ever fit in at Erudite." I answered. "What about you?"

"The same really... I do miss those videos I used to watch about those tigers, the ones that are extinct."

I smiled. "You're still a geek at heart."

He chuckled. "I guess I am."

* * *

The pair of us headed back to the accommodation about an hour later, to find everyone huddled around Four and the chalk board.

"What's going on?" I questioned.

"This is a progress report of your rankings. Stage two differed from stage one because it is emotional rather than physical. The ranks are determined by the average simulation time and how well you calmed down, meaning that if someone was ranked fifth after stage one, they could be given a higher ranking. Stage one was to determine your physical skills in combat. Stage two was facing your fears and calming down in the face of them. The final stage will be weighted more heavily, as it will focus on the number of fears you have and how to resolve them. Remember that." Four informed us.

"There isn't anymore cuts after this though... is there?" Freddie asked.

"No," Four replied. "but the better the ranking, the better job you'll get after initiation."

Freddie nodded.

Four glanced down at the board one last time, before turning and hanging it on a nail beside the door.

Once he stepped out of the way, I could clearly see the board, and I was glad to see that I was second. Of course, Nathan was first and Talulah was third, and luckily Freddie was Fourth.

The irritated growl of James made my stomach churn, and he shoved past me, storming into the bathroom.

I bit my lip and watched him, then turned to look at Freddie, before I got the chance to make a comment, Four spoke.

"Where's Talulah and Nathan?"

"Doing something for Lu I think... she asked them before she left, then I think they're going for a walk." I answered.

Freddie nodded, as if to agree with me.

Four nodded. "Well, I trust that you'll let them know their ranks when they get back."

"Sure will." Freddie replied.

"Good." Four turned to the door. "I'll see you in the morning."

We waited until Four had left, then looked at each other with knowing expressions on our faces.

"I wonder if there's rules against what they're doing tonight..." I mumbled as I headed towards my bed.

"Eric and Four never mentioned anything if there is." Freddie followed me. "Plus, they put the same sex initiates in the same living quarters, they must expect it at one point or another."

"Hmm..." I mumbled, and flopped down on top of the sheets. Freddie sat down next to my pillow. "Have you ever.. you know?"

He shook his head. "No... but I know people that have."

"What, people our age?"

He nodded. "Yeah.. younger too."

I raised an eyebrow, it was unlike Erudite youngsters to be 'into' that kind of thing... but I guess everyone did it eventually.

"Have you?"

"No. I'm not exactly what you call desirable. Most people thought I was stupid in Erudite, therefore stayed away from me."

He nodded, as if he understood. "Well, if I'd have known who you were in Erudite, then I'd have been friends with you then too."

I smiled. "Thanks."

"You have kissed a guy though, haven't you?"

"Of course." I nodded, remembering the one boy that I'd ever been close to in my old faction. His name was Benedict, and he'd been the only person to ever notice me. He'd chosen Candor at the choosing ceremony a few weeks ago.

I rolled over into my stomach and looked at Freddie properly. "Looks like Nathan and Tee will be the first out of all of us."

"Or James... I have a feeling that there was something more than just friendship between him and Aimee."

I bit my lip again at the mention of James. I wanted to share my worries about him with Freddie. "Freddie... is James worrying you at all?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, he spends all of his time alone in here, and he's always so angry."

"So what? You would too if your best friend was made Factionless and no one else spoke to you..."

"Well, yeah, I guess. But I'm scared he's going to do something crazy."

"What like jump off of the Chasm?" He joked.

I tensed my jaw. "No."

"Then what?"

"He's bound to burst eventually... what if he physically takes it out on one of us? He's really strong."

Freddie sighed. "I think you're being stupid. He'll be fine. Stop worrying so much."

I nodded at his words, but they didn't reassure me at all. I was certain that something bad would happen soon, and I knew that James would be the one to do it.


	14. Chapter 14

I awoke the next morning to the sound of quiet humming. I knew instantly that it was Talulah, and that she was in a good mood.

I poked my head out from under the sheets to see that she was tying her boots up, smiling away whilst humming. She was in a _very_ good mood.

"Someone's happy..." I said, trying to cover my grin with the sheets.

She looked up at me and grinned, and I thought that she was going to burst. "I had such a good night, Jac!"

I rolled my eyes jokingly. "Spare me the gory details." I pushed the sheets back and sat up. "What happened?"

She sat up properly and held her arm out to me. "Well, look at the bracelet Nathan got me!"

I looked down at the small silver bracelet that was wrapped delicately around her small wrist. It had two small charms hanging on it, one red, and one black and white.

"He said that the colours of the charm represent us, and where we come from."

I smiled. "That's so cute!"

"I know!" She squealed. "Did you know that Lu had given him her keys for the night? We had such a good time! He gave me this, then we sat and talked and cuddled for a bit, then he asked me to be his girlfriend..."

I pretended to be surprised and let out an excited gasp. "What did you say?"

"Yes, of course!"

I let out a girly squeal and grinned. "Then what happened?"

"You wanted me to spare the gory details..." She pursed her lips, trying to smother a smile.

My jaw dropped open and then I grinned again. "You guys..."

She nodded.

"No way!" I cried.

She threw her head back and let out an excited giggle.

"Oh my gosh!" I laughed. "You dirty little..."

She giggled again.

I shuffled off of the bed and grabbed some clothes out from the small compartment underneath it. "How many times?" I asked. When it came to sex I only knew what I'd heard from other people, and read about, but I figured it was enough to have a conversation about it with her.

"Twice." She answered, still smiling away.

"Was it good?"

"It was great."

I laughed and searched for my shoes "I'm really happy for you, Tee."

"Thank you." She smiled at me.

"Oh, you ranked third by the way... Nathan was first!"

"Really?" She cried. "Oh this day is just getting better and better!"

I laughed again. "You're a lucky girl."

"Aren't I just?"

* * *

After everyone had finished eating their breakfast, Four stood up and paused between the two tables that all of the initiates were sat on.

"Transfers, we're doing something different today. Follow me."

We all got to our feet and followed him as he led us out of the dining hall and along the path that surrounded the Pit. Talulah and Nathan walked directly behind him, their fingers interlocked, as Freddie and I dawdled along just behind them, and James trailed along at the back silently. Sometimes I felt incredibly guilty that James was so alone, but he always had that look on his face that made you stay away. He was the type of person that you feared would eye strike you just for saying hello.

We walked higher and higher, going further up than I've ever been before. I looked up to find that we were getting closer and closer to the glass ceiling, then noticed how pale Talulah had gone. She didn't particularly enjoy heights.

Four led us up a flight of stairs that disappeared into a hole in the ceiling, and once we reached the top, I realised that the surface we would be walking across was the glass ceiling.

We go through another door, and beyond it is a huge, dark space with graffitied walls and exposed pipes. The room is lit by a series of old-fashioned fluorescent tubes with plastic covers that looked incredibly ancient.

Four paused in the centre of the room. "This is a different kind of simulation known as the fear landscape. It has been disabled for our purposes, so this isn't what it will be like the next time you see it."

'Dauntless' is spray-painted in a red artistic scrawl on the wall behind him.

"Through your simulations," he continued. "we have stored data about your worst fears. The fear landscape accesses that data and presents you with a series of virtual obstacles. Some of the obstacles will be fears you previously faced in your simulations however some may be new fears. The difference is that you are aware in the fear landscape, that it is a simulation, so you will have all your wits about you as you go through it."

I raised an eyebrow. That seemed interesting.

"The number of fears you have in your land scape varies according to how many you have. I told you before that the third stage of initiation focuses on mental preparation, that is because it requires you to control both your emotions and your body-to combine the physical abilities you learned in stage one with the emotional mastery you learned in stage two."

I took a deep breath, taking in all of the information. I wondered how many fears I would have?

"Next week you will go through your fear landscape as quickly as possible in front of a panel of Dauntless leaders." Four stated. "That will be your final test, which determines your ranking for stage three. Just as stage two of initiation is weighted more heavily than stage one, stage three is weighted heaviest of all. Understood?"

We all nodded. Talulah looked slightly overwhelmed, and I glanced back at James to see his solemn face just staring at the floor.

Getting a good score on this, would help my job opportunities when I became a proper Dauntless member. The thought of initiation being nearly over made me excited and disappointed at the same time. It would all change again once it was over.

"You can get past each obstacle in one of two ways. Either you find a way to calm down enough that the simulation registers a normal, steady heartbeat, or you find a way to face your fear, which can force the simulation to move on. One way to face a fear of drowning is to swim deeper, for example." Four shrugged. "So I suggest that you take the next week to consider your fears and develop strategies to face them."

"So some people could have something like seven fears and another could have fifteen?" Freddie questioned.

Four nodded. "Yeah."

"Won't that affect our rankings? What if someone gets tired after the first ten and struggles with the last few?" He quizzed.

"If they want to pass, they won't." Four answered, crossing his arms over his chest.

* * *

After dinner that evening, I headed up to the control room to find Calvin. I'd never been there before, and I'd got a little lost, eventually having to ask a Dauntless member for directions. I'd found it soon after that, and knocked on the door.

Four opened it. "Yes Jac?"

It was like he knew that I was coming. I tried to hide my confusion and spoke. "Is Calvin here?"

He looked over his shoulder, then nodded. "You shouldn't really be bothering him at work, you know." He held open the door, and gestured for me to go in.

"I'm sorry, it won't happen again." I said as I slipped under his arm and walked into the room. As soon as I spotted all of the computer screens, I realised that Four had been expecting me, and would've seen me on one of the computer screens. They monitored the entire compound, Lu had told me that yesterday.

"Good." Four let the door swing shut, then called out for the blonde man that I was looking for. "Calvin, it's a guest for you!"

I heard the rolling of wheels on the floor, then looked up to see Calvin appear from behind a wall. He was sat on one of those chairs that wheeled around, and I felt slightly jealous. I'd always found those chairs fun.

"Oh, Jac!" Calvin reached into his pocket and I heard the jangling of keys. He threw them at me, and I quickly caught them. "There you go. I finish at seven, so if you're not done until after then, you'll have to bring them to the tattoo place because Tori's filling in my back for me."

I nodded. "Okay. I shouldn't be too long, I'm just going to do what she asked then I'll bring them back."

"Who's keys are those?" Four questioned.

"Lu's." Calvin answered.

"You're giving an initiate the keys to someone else's apartment? They're not even supposed to be up there yet!"

Calvin shrugged. "Lu trusts her, I trust her... It's not my apartment that would get trashed anyway."

Four rolled his eyes. "We're going to be keeping an eye on you." He told me, gesturing to the computer screen.

"I'm only going to tidy up for her, then I'm out."

"Since when did you become her slave?"

"It's not called slavery, it's called having a heart and helping out a friend." I replied, grinning at him.

Calvin chuckled. "Get out of here, let us work!"

"Okay, okay!" I walked in the direction of the door. "See you later!"

* * *

Cleaning Lu's apartment was fairly easy. I found some products in her kitchen cupboard to use, and gave most things a wipe down, before working on the bathroom. I stripped her bed, then searched around for some clean sheets and struggled to put them on. For some reason, her mattress was ridiculously heavy.

By the time I was done, I was actually sweating and slightly out of breath. I'd have said that I was there for about two hours. I made sure to put the cleaning products away, and switch off any appliances, before leaving and locking the door behind me.

As I pulled the key out, a voice startled me.

"What are you doing in Lu's apartment?"

I span around and pressed my back against the door, looking up at the person that had startled me.

"You need to stop doing that!" I breathed, moving a hand up to brush my hair out of my face.

"Sorry." Eric smirked. "You didn't answer my question."

"Lu asked me to change her bedsheets whilst she was away. I need to get the keys back to Calvin soon."

"Why would she want you to do that?" He frowned.

I shrugged. "Don't ask me." I lied. _I knew exactly why. It just wasn't a good idea to tell him. _

"Right..." He mumbled, looking slightly suspicious.

I half-heartedly smiled at him, then turned to pull the key out of the door. Unfortunately, it wouldn't come out. I tugged on it a few times, irritated.

I heard Eric sigh behind me, then felt his hand on my waist. He moved me out of the way, then lifted the door handle and twisted the key a few times before pulling it out.

My cheeks flushed as heat rushed to them. _How embarrassing_. I couldn't even lock a door successfully.

He held the keys out to me. "You were doing it wrong."

I nodded. "Yeah, I see that now." I mumbled.

He smirked again. "So, you ranked second. Are you happy?"

"Second so far." I shrugged. "Talulah's not far behind me."

"She won't beat you." He stated after rolling his eyes.

"And you know that do you?"

"No. But I've got a pretty good feeling."

"Hm." I hummed, and pushed the keys into my pocket.

"Trust me. You're good. Quite fast for someone who has to face fear twice in a row."

"It's not easy that's for sure." I mumbled. "I've definitely calmed down with the needles though, I think I'm starting to realise that being pinned down on a regular basis isn't particularly enjoyable."

"Ah, well, now that depends on what situation you're in." He smirked and I felt my cheeks flush again. _Did he really just say that?_ He silently chuckled at my blush, then changed the subject. "Have you eaten today?"

"Yeah." I smiled.

"Good." He replied, but I thought I saw a hint of disappointment on his face. _No you didn't Jacquetta. Stop being stupid. _

"Thanks again though, for the other day."

"No problem."

I rolled up onto my toes, then back onto the heels of my feet. A strange feeling inside of me wanted him to ask me to stay, yet another told me that was stupid and I should just say goodbye and leave.

"What are you doing tonight then?"

I almost frowned at his question, wondering why he was interested, then I realised that it was keeping me here longer. "I have no idea. I've got a feeling that Talulah and Nathan will disappear together and I'll be left with Freddie again."

"Sounds like fun." He muttered sarcastically.

I hesitated for a fraction of a second before uttering my reply. "Well if you can suggest something better.."

He looked unsure of what to say for a second, before finally nodding his head. "Alright."

I looked up at him, waiting for him to continue.

"You transferred from Erudite. You like to read?"

I nodded. "Yeah..."

"Come with me then." He tilted his head in the direction of the stairs.

I hesitated for a second, mentally debating with myself whether it would be a good idea to go or not. Finally, I came to a decision. "Lead the way."

He took me down past the Pit, through to the accommodation, then all the way up to the hole in the ground that I had jumped down on my first day. We walked straight past it, and down into a dark hallway that I'd barely paid attention to before. A few moments later, we approached a hole in the wall and my jaw dropped as we reached the other side.

In front of me was dozens of dark wooden shelves, full of books. There was only three rows, but it was more than enough for me.

"Dauntless has a library?!"

He nodded. "Not many people come up here. I don't even think some people know that it exists."

My wide eyes explored the room. "They're all stupid then."

He smirked. "You didn't know it was here..."

"Yeah, because I'm new."

He chuckled quietly. "You're like a child in a playground."

"I feel like one..."

"Go and take a look." He said.

"Can I take one?"

He nodded. "You just have to tell Gina that you're taking it." He nodded in the direction of a middle aged woman sat behind a desk in the corner, her head in a book.

I grinned and dashed off into the row in front of me. I reached out and let my fingertips brush against the spines of the books as I read their titles.

It felt like forever since I last read a book, and I was eager to read another.

I pulled out a few of them, reading the back before pushing it back into it's space and continuing my search. So far I'd not found anything interesting, so I walked around into the next row.

Here, I found Eric looking at a few books on one of the higher shelves.

I headed over to his side, and looked up at the shelf that he was scrutinising. It was then that a book caught my eye.

_Peter Pan_.

It was a fiction book that I'd read as a child, and I'd loved it. The thought of the lost boys and the little fairy made a small smile tug at the side of my lips.

Eric noticed this, and looked at me before looking back up at the shelf. "What book is taking your fancy?"

"Peter Pan." I answered.

He reached up and pulled it down, looking at the cover. "Isn't this a children's book?"

I shrugged. "I guess I'm a child at heart."

He slowly nodded. "So you want to take this one?"

"Yeah.. please."

He gestured towards Gina's desk and we slowly approached it.

"Hello Eric." Gina looked up at him and smiled, then looked at me. "I'm sorry, I don't think we've met."

I shook my head.

"Gina, this is Jac. She's one of the new transfers."

Gina slowly nodded. "I see. An Erudite transfer I take it?"

"What gave it away?" I joked.

She smiled. "Well, it's nice to meet you, Jac. Are you taking that book?"

"Yeah." Eric answered.

"I want it back sometime this month. You still owe me a few from a while back."

Eric nodded. "Yes ma'am." He grinned.

Gina looked like she wanted to swat him on the head with a book. "Get out of here!"

He chuckled and put a hand on my back, leading me towards the door. "Bye Gina."

"Goodbye Eric, hope to see you again soon Jac."

Eric removed his hand from my back and handed me the book as we walked back down the dark hallway. A smile was still present on my face as I felt the hard material of the book in my hands.

"You two seem to get on well." I commented on his and Gina's relationship.

"Yeah. She's decent." He replied, taking a side wards glance at me.

"She seems it." I nodded, then looked down at the book. "Have you ever read this?"

He shook his head. "Nope, never."

I frowned. "Your childhood was never complete!"

A small smirk appeared on his lips. "You're a little nerd." _Was he being serious, or just teasing me?_

I frowned again. "You just took me to a library, I think I'm allowed to be a geek for a while."

He chuckled, then spoke again. "Come back to mine."

"Why?" My heart raced, and I was unsure why.

"It'll be quieter, easier to read."

I nodded. He didn't need to tell me twice. "Okay."

* * *

We arrived back at his, and the first thing that I did was curl up in the corner of the couch and open the book. Eric headed into the kitchen and made us both a drink, before joining me on the couch.

"Shuffle over a bit." He ordered, and I shifted over a little, wondering why he didn't just sit at the other end.

He slid in beside me, his arm rested on the couch behind me, his body basically pressed to mine. I didn't comment on this, but I felt my cheeks flush a little at the proximity. _Did he realise what he was doing? _

I tried to ignore it, and continued to read from where I'd gotten to before he interrupted me. I was still on the first page, and I noticed that he had started to read over my shoulder.

"You know, if you wanted to read it, you could just have it right now. I can wait a few days." I told him.

He shook his head.

"But I'm ahead of you, so it'll be complicated when it comes to turning pages." I complained.

He sighed, and I felt his warm breath on my neck. "Read it to me then."

"What?"

"You heard."

I frowned for a second, then sighed and started to read it aloud. "All children, except one, grow up. They soon know that they will grow up, and the way Wendy knew was this..."

I continued to read for a little while longer, managing to get through a few chapters before I needed to stop.

"Eric, can you pass me my drink?" I questioned and he groaned, before dragging himself away from me, off of the couch and towards the coffee table. He grabbed a cup and handed it to me before grabbing his own.

I sniffed it, realising that it wasn't water. "What is this?"

"Gin." He replied.

I raised an eyebrow. _Alcohol? _

"What? Have you never had it before?"

"Well, no.."

"Of course." He rolled his eyes. "Don't just stare at it. Try it."

I lifted the cup up to my lips and sipped from it. It had a very piney and biting taste, and as I swallowed my chest felt warm. Surprisingly though, I liked it.

"Do you drink this often?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Every now and again."

"It's got a very distinctive taste..."

He nodded. "Most people mix it with something, but I prefer it straight."

I looked back down at the cup and took another sip. "It's nice..."

I watched as he downed the contents of his cup, then put it on the table. "Carry on?" He gestured towards the book.

I sipped the drink once more, then passed him my cup. He placed it beside his as I got myself comfortable and picked up the book again, my legs stretched out in front of me.

I found where we were and started to read again. After a few minutes, Eric scooped up my legs and shuffled backwards, then laid my legs over his lap. I continued to read, glancing up every now and again to see him staring at me as I recited the book.

After a while, I'd started to feel a little tired and a yawn escaped my lips halfway through reading a sentence.

"Are you tired?" Eric asked.

"A little..."

He looked disappointed. "You can go if you want to."

I shook my head. "I can't. I know that you're enjoying the book, so I'd feel bad taking it."

"Don't worry about it."

I shook my head again, another yawn escaping my mouth. "How about you read it out for a bit, and I'll listen."

He considered it for a second, then held his hand out for the book. "I want that seat though."

I rolled my eyes and swung my legs around so that my feet were placed on the floor. I heard Eric move behind me, then as I went to stand up his hands found my waist and pulled me backwards.

"There's room for two of us."

I looked down at the small gap that he wanted me to fit into and slowly nodded. _We'd be pressed up against each other again... _

I lifted my legs up and shuffled downwards, so that my back was against his chest and my head was rested against the arm of the chair. One of his arms was just above my head on the couch, and the other he gently placed over my side so that the book was just in front of me.

"Where did we get to?" He questioned, and my fingers softly slid across the page at the point I had stopped at.

He started to read it out loud, his warm breath on the back of my neck. I tried to concentrate on reading the words as he spoke them, but my eyes began to feel heavy and continuously fluttered shut, no matter how many times I opened them again.

The last thing I heard before I sunk into unconsciousness was Eric's deep voice.


End file.
